Hey all,
I have an appointment with my therapist and parents in about an hour, so I'll be heading out soon.
I'll let you guys know how everything goes, and thanks for the support in the past as well as thanks in advance for future support.
Love you guys!!
*Shakin in my skate sneaks*
Good luck, Nate. No matter what happens, I'm (along with everyone else here!) here for you and I'm always here to talk.
*big hug*
Brady
Break a leg! ;D
We're all here for you. Don't sweat it.
Here's hoping to a non-event!!
Jay
Good luck, Nate. I hope it goes well.
Yes, good luck. Hope it goes well.
Good luck man, I hope they are understanding/ react nicely. Keep us posted!
Hope goes well. Haven't been able to get any of my family to therapist with me. Kinda afraid to as well.
Quote from: Aiden on August 14, 2008, 04:25:51 PM
Hope goes well. Haven't been able to get any of my family to therapist with me. Kinda afraid to as well.
Dude my hands were trembling while I read my letter! I was terrified too but I'm glad it's over with.
So I really don't even want to think about it right now, cause I have the biggest headache (caused by stressful over-emotional meeting) but I'm letting everyone who I know cares about me and has supported me know how it went. So you guys aren't left out of that loop.
I read them the letter....They both looked like they were gonna cry. And thank GOD I had my therapist there, she got conversation going, got everyone talking and we all talked it out. They think I'm just going through another phase (my dad mostly) because they know I've been trying to figure out who I am....
Mom is supportive though, she's very confused about why I feel this way but she wants me to be happy in the end. It's kinda the reaction I expected from her, so I'm happy. She wanted me to know she loves me no matter what. My mom's a great person and I know this, she accepts people no matter what because she knows there's no changing them! I feel like if there was a motto to describe her it would be "live and let live."
Dad on the other hand....thinks I shoulda told them all of this when I dressed like a boy on our family cruise, for formal night (it's in my avatar) DESPITE the fact that back then I was still trying to cope with the possibility of even BEING trans, and was simply trying out clothes I always wanted to try.
He didn't say all that, but I can tell he thinks I'm a liar because in my letter I said "I haven't really gone through phase 1 of this transition because I want you guys to be a part of it" and he's all "oh but you already cut your hair and started dressing like a guy." .......I told him "well I'm still not comfortable with the idea of chopping off my boobs, so technically I'm in phase one still...." I've always known that whatever I do though, nothing I ever do has ever made him happy so I'm not worried about him. I expected him to be that way. His motto is "you can't teach an old dog new tricks." Cause the old dog is to stubborn to change and to realize that I'm not the same person I was 2 years ago in my "Islam" stage which he brought up repeatedly. Back then I told them I was "thinking" about converting when I had already converted the day before....This is different to me because I still don't feel I know myself well enough to go through with all this let alone tell THEM about it. And I still told them. Which means I thought I had some kind of confidence in the hope that they could see I've changed.
No matter what though, I'm not doing this for my dad and it still hurts that he reacted that way even if I was expecting it. But I love my mom and I thank her for her continued support. I still want to go by "Nathan" in the fall at school, so I'm still going through this appointment I made with a counselor on campus to see if I could do that without having to legally change my name, because I'm not certain I'm ready for that step either no matter how much I love being called Nathaniel.
Thanks to all of you guys. I really just want to go watch movies and not think about this for a while since it's so fresh, but I felt all you guys who wanted to know had a right to know.
Well done bro. Well done. It is good you have someone in family to support you.
Thanks for posting, Nate. I've been thinking about you all day--you sorta helped me, too, because I was obsessing a little less about myself for a change.
Coming out took real cojones. Now maybe you can destress a little and come to terms with your new situation.
Be well, my friend.
You did it, you survived, congrats. Its a big day, a lot to take in for parents. Hopefully all your dad needs is time. But even if he never comes around you gotta live your life.
I'm in a group with 2 young girls. One is out and the other is not. If I were their age I'd be terrified to come out, too. And you guys (most of you) aren't much older than they are.
At my age (old fart!! LOL) it was scary enough. But I'm at the age where I don't need their approval and can do whatever the he** I want. Not the case if I were younger and still depended on them for housing or financially or whatever.
Good for you. Now pop a cold one and chill... you deserve it!
Jay
Good job! I just blurted it out before I even had a chance to think about it when I was upset. But you actually went there and told them! That does take a lot of courage. We're all proud of you. :icon_tenisclap: I wish I had been able to do that because they don't really know how far I want to go with this. They actually don't know that much at all. But anyway, Congrats! And don't worry about your dad. :icon_chillpill:
And don't worry about your hands shaking either; it probably wasn't as noticeable as you think.
Congrats on the coming out, Nate! It took a lot of guts, but you did it! :eusa_clap:
Your mum sounds supportive, and yeah, your dad needs a lot of time, but who knows, he might come around in a while.
For now, try to relax a bit, watch a movie, take a walk in the woods, hang out with your mates, and generally try to be yourself. Rest assured, you are one step closer to being your true self.
Im glad it went well and that your mum supports you and will love you no matter what.
It was probably the best enviroment to do it in aswell!
Im happy for you dude!
Well done mate!!! :icon_clap: That's so good to hear, I was wondering how you went. :icon_bunch: It's wonderful your Mum took it so well, and if she and your Dad talk (which they undoubtedly will) she might be able to help him accept it as well. If not, at least he's not throwing you out or cutting you off or anything, which is something. And even if he does take a little while to come around, you haven't really lost either of them, which is what you seemed (justifiably) scared of. :)
So yes, well done for going through with it all! ;D :icon_clap: No idea what time it is where you are, but hope you're feeling a bit better about everything. :angel:
:icon_hug:
Lutin
Good job Nate, and congratulations. That's the hardest coming out you'll have to do, probably.
Dennis
Congrats!
Congrats, good luck with the rest of it!
Thanks everyone!!!
Things seem normal around the house, as if nothing ever happened. Mom is just as happy as ever, and dad...well dad never really talks anyway so nothing different about that.
Thanks for all the support, this was really stressful for me, especially considering I don't know what I am 100% and wanted to make that clear to them (and failed).