Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Non-binary talk => Topic started by: Pica Pica on September 07, 2008, 04:48:02 PM

Title: why i don't like managers
Post by: Pica Pica on September 07, 2008, 04:48:02 PM
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=P_pp4klYTzM (http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=P_pp4klYTzM)
Title: Re: why i don't like managers
Post by: Nero on September 07, 2008, 05:04:37 PM
I can relate to that somewhat. Not just with managers but with people in general. They come at me one way but in just a short time talking with me, they completely change the way they speak to me. Most of them anyhow. And then there's the ones who can't figure me out, so they steer clear after talking with me once or twice. I tend to make managers feel awkward and they then speak very formally with me.


and ginger - you butchered all your pretty hair! wild outift though.  :laugh:
Title: Re: why i don't like managers
Post by: Pica Pica on September 07, 2008, 05:05:53 PM
the hair needs to butchered every seven months...i'm wearing that to my cousin's wedding next week.
Title: Re: why i don't like managers
Post by: Seshatneferw on September 08, 2008, 06:12:39 AM
But, but, your old hair went much better with the dress. :'(

  Nfr
Title: Re: why i don't like managers
Post by: Jaimey on September 08, 2008, 06:14:24 PM
Hmm, this isn't something that I have experienced.  I think a lot of it depends on your ability to get on with people superficially or how good your mask is.  I've only had one manager that I despised and that was because she was stupid.  ...but then again, I don't have much experience with the type of managers you're talking about...the temporary or maybe consultant types.  ???  I don't think I've ever had a manager that didn't like me, mostly because I do what I'm told in a timely manner...that is to say, I never tried to get along with them socially, so I never noticed any gender oriented...well, whatever the word is.  But then again, I worked in a bookstore, at a university...yeah...so maybe it's a different crowd?

Title: Re: why i don't like managers
Post by: annajasmine on September 08, 2008, 10:44:51 PM
I just applied for a job as a manager today at ALDI's. Sorry if that makes you dislike me if I get hired but maybe I could lead you in a cheer about stocking shelves. Anyways what always bothers me about managers is a lot of them are so fake maybe that has something that to do with your dislike of them.


Anna
Title: Re: why i don't like managers
Post by: Nero on September 08, 2008, 11:01:16 PM
Quote from: annajasmine on September 08, 2008, 10:44:51 PM
I just applied for a job as a manager today at ALDI's. Sorry if that makes you dislike me if I get hired but maybe I could lead you in a cheer about stocking shelves. Anyways what always bothers me about managers is a lot of them are so fake maybe that has something that to do with your dislike of them.


Anna


Pica dislikes managers because they don't treat hir right.
Title: Re: why i don't like managers
Post by: Pica Pica on September 09, 2008, 01:14:34 AM
i like most of them over a time...

and jamie, how did you get a job at a bookshop? i have applied for hundreds of bookshop jobs, i am a voracious reader, i am a struggling writer, i am good with people usually and all the arrogant sods have ignored me.
Title: Re: why i don't like managers
Post by: Seshatneferw on September 09, 2008, 04:24:24 AM
Quote from: Jaimey on September 08, 2008, 06:14:24 PM
I never tried to get along with them socially, so I never noticed any gender oriented...well, whatever the word is.  But then again, I worked in a bookstore, at a university...yeah...so maybe it's a different crowd?

I think that's part of it; I haven't encountered these types in the academic jobs I've held. The ones I've come across at work were mostly salesmen (male salespeople :)), and for the most part my cisgendered colleagues were equally uncomfortable with them. But then they usually had other problems too -- these are the people who'd happily sell you their grandmother, then call a week later with 'Sorry, there are some delays at the crematorium. Don't worry, you'll get granny in a couple of months, and meanwhile here's this full ashtray.'

But yes, the behaviour is familiar, I just haven't had a boss who'd exhibit it. I guess that's in part because in the places where I've worked the managers generally don't come from outside so they don't need short-cuts in integrating, and also in part because these short-cuts would be seen as fake anyway.

  Nfr
Title: Re: why i don't like managers
Post by: Jaimey on September 10, 2008, 06:22:00 PM
Quote from: Pica Pica on September 09, 2008, 01:14:34 AM
i like most of them over a time...

and jamie, how did you get a job at a bookshop? i have applied for hundreds of bookshop jobs, i am a voracious reader, i am a struggling writer, i am good with people usually and all the arrogant sods have ignored me.

Good question.  You have to find the people who are book nuts and not sales nuts.  That's the difference.  I worked at Borders, but the store I worked at had been an independent bookstore and the manager (and 95% of the staff) were from the old store, so that worked in my favor.  Also, they didn't have anyone who knew anything about manga/graphic novels.  Being weird has it's perks from time to time. :D  (there was a guy there with a Ph.D in parisitology...but he worked in a bookstore and supposedly wore a kilt on St. Patrick's Day ???)

Come to think of it, I had a couple of sales jobs and I did hate those people on a certain level.  They were nice, but they weren't 'my people'.  I need the quirky folks...I only worked at my two sales positions for less than a week at each of them.  Yeah.  I could definitely feel a difference between them and me.  Thanks, Nfr, for mentioning sales.  I'd erased those jobs from my memory ;D, but they are good examples, I think, of what Pica was saying.  :D
Title: Re: why i don't like managers
Post by: Eva Marie on September 11, 2008, 10:57:21 PM
Quote from: Nero on September 07, 2008, 05:04:37 PM
I can relate to that somewhat. Not just with managers but with people in general. They come at me one way but in just a short time talking with me, they completely change the way they speak to me. Most of them anyhow. And then there's the ones who can't figure me out, so they steer clear after talking with me once or twice. I tend to make managers feel awkward and they then speak very formally with me.

This has also kind of been my experience. Male managers especially don't know how to take me and what usually happens with them are awkward, professional level interactions. I can tell that they sense something is different about me, but they can't exactly put their finger on it  :laugh:

I'm never "one of the boys", and I don't really want to be. For some reason I can usually get along fine with the female managers.

I can't stand arrogant managers, idiotic managers, narcissistic managers, managers possessing book knowledge and a degree but not having any real life experience (ie: know it alls), short-time managers, and managers with apparent hearing issues (as in they don't listen to their people). And there seems to be plenty of these kinds around. I've only worked for a few managers that i've really admired and respected.

The mark of a good manager is that he has gained enough respect to lead his people instead of having to resport to fear and intimidation to drive them. The fear/intimidation model is easier, the respect model is a lot harder.
Title: Re: why i don't like managers
Post by: Constance on September 28, 2008, 12:05:36 PM
Very nice outfit indeed.

Turns out that I, too, had 9 jobs by the time I was 23.

Again, you've put out another video that really explains what it is to be an androgyne. Thanks, Pica.