Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Female to male transsexual talk (FTM) => Topic started by: Jasonk16 on September 21, 2008, 10:14:41 PM

Title: love life after transition
Post by: Jasonk16 on September 21, 2008, 10:14:41 PM
once you have the bottom surgery
u still cant have a sexual relationship without telling the person


Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: Elwood on September 21, 2008, 10:28:57 PM
Depends, really. It's amazing, really. If you are willing to go through crap loads of surgeries and if you can pay for it all... you can get a pretty realistic looking phallus.

But sure. I think living 100% stealth is an unrealistic dream. I want to find a lover who can stand not outing me everywhere we go, but they will know my "secret."
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: Jasonk16 on September 21, 2008, 10:33:07 PM
the money part just sucks

finding a lover isn so easy either
ive given up trying to find anyone

ima let someone find me.
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: Elwood on September 21, 2008, 10:34:54 PM
Meh. Dating isn't part of my life right now. I'm too busy. School, transition, OCD, health, being underweight, community service, peer counselor training... Sure, I could date someone, but they'd have to ask me out. I'm not going to be hunting at a time like this.
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: kestin on September 22, 2008, 01:44:15 AM
Meh same here >_> though, I get envious of how easily the 'straight' people can just hook up with eachother, go out for a few weeks and then stop without any issues. I just want one friggin relationship! JUST ONE! lol XD my increase in libido has made me want one more... - -
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: Dennis on September 22, 2008, 02:02:15 AM
Straight bio folks don't think it's easy for them to find a partner either. When the right person happens along, she or he will, and won't care whether you've had surgery or not. When I met my gf, she'd been in a straight marriage for 20 years. I was trying to figure out how to tell her I had no dick. Turns out she'd researched ftm's and was hoping that whatever I had, I had feeling. She's ok with whatever I need to do to get the bits in line with what I feel I need, and she's ok with what I've got.

Finding a partner sucks no matter what configuration you have or are attracted to, but when you find the right one, it's all worth it.

Dennis
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: Jay on September 22, 2008, 05:30:56 AM
I have no real intrest in finding someone either. Yeah I would like some someone exspecially now christmas is coming.. but it doesn't look like it is going to happen and Im fine first christmas in four years that I am going to be spending alone. I have my friends at least!

Its to complicated to get into a relationship with some one new at the moment and I myself do not feel in the slightest bit commfortable in this body.. perhaps after chest surgery maybe guess we shall have to see...


Jay

Just waiting for that lovely woman to find me...
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: sneakersjay on September 22, 2008, 11:18:51 AM
Quote from: Dennis on September 22, 2008, 02:02:15 AM
Straight bio folks don't think it's easy for them to find a partner either. When the right person happens along, she or he will, and won't care whether you've had surgery or not. When I met my gf, she'd been in a straight marriage for 20 years. I was trying to figure out how to tell her I had no dick. Turns out she'd researched ftm's and was hoping that whatever I had, I had feeling. She's ok with whatever I need to do to get the bits in line with what I feel I need, and she's ok with what I've got.

Finding a partner sucks no matter what configuration you have or are attracted to, but when you find the right one, it's all worth it.

Dennis

Thanks, Dennis.  That gives me hope!!  I'm not planning on dating until at least a year has passed on T, when my surgery sites will have healed pretty much, and I'm more comfortable in my new male role.

Jay

P.S.  Your wife have any single open-minded girlfriends?   ;D  Dang, I gotta get that passport!!
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: James-Alen on September 22, 2008, 11:42:17 AM
Yeah I'd say there are far more accepting people out there than you guys think (for some reason my brain wants to say mostly women) but still lol. You'll find someone don't worry about it, they come along. I have a weird thing that I almost don't want someone right now. I was in a short, crappy relationship and realized how much I unappreciated the freedom. I like being my own dog for now, maybe I'll settle down a little farther down the road.
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: jonjon on September 22, 2008, 12:59:59 PM
I keep umming and arring about relationships. Hmm... That almost sounds like a commitment! >_< lol

I dont think i have the time or the space in my little world for anyone else at the moment... but i really do miss having a sex life.
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: Jay on September 22, 2008, 01:12:58 PM
Quotebut i really do miss having a sex life.

Damn me too! 4 3/4 months.. not that anyone is counting! *sigh*
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: icontact on September 22, 2008, 06:14:43 PM
Frankly, I just want to be seen as the [generally] straight guy. Not some obsessively butch lesbian.

All the straight ladies think I'm a lesbian and all the lesbians treat me as a man to the extent of ruling me out before they even really know me.

:'(
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: tekla on September 22, 2008, 06:22:40 PM
A)  People want what they want, and nothing about your live is going to interfer with that.  So, if they want to be crammed with the big man sausage, it will not be you.  So, find someone else.
----------- P. S. lots of girls like that MS deal, don't bother trying to change them.

Be yourself - or, if that's just some jerk off jerk, be someone else - and go for it.
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: jonjon on September 23, 2008, 02:23:08 AM
Quote from: Jay on September 22, 2008, 01:12:58 PM
Quotebut i really do miss having a sex life.

Damn me too! 4 3/4 months.. not that anyone is counting! *sigh*

lucky you. 3/4 years here.

I dont really seem to attract women much... more the gay guys than anything. I've no idea whats up with that.
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: Jasonk16 on September 23, 2008, 11:31:04 AM
I don't think I've ever had a guy like me

that would be interesting.
Title: Re: love life after transition
Post by: Jay on September 23, 2008, 11:36:19 AM
Quote from: jonjon on September 23, 2008, 02:23:08 AM
Quote from: Jay on September 22, 2008, 01:12:58 PM
Quotebut i really do miss having a sex life.

Damn me too! 4 3/4 months.. not that anyone is counting! *sigh*

lucky you. 3/4 years here.

I dont really seem to attract women much... more the gay guys than anything. I've no idea whats up with that.

I have had that every time I go to Gay bars the men always hit on me.. guess I do really pass!

Damn...

Quote
that would be interesting.

It is wierd actually.. some gay men dont understand that "Im straight" means I only like girls.. a bit to far!