i have no friends and my family never wants to do anything so i never have anything to do.
its so boring.
i like to be out with groups of people doing anything.
but no, people have to be rude.
also
i have no job because i havent changed my name and it costs $210 to change it.
thats also why im not in college.
i cant stand the idea of going back to being called my birth name.
i havent been called that in 2 years.
is that selfish of me?
idk.
i just feel i cant enroll for school and deal with anything like that until my name is changed
so my life is filled with nothing.
ha i live for my next shot basically.
that's no way to live bro :(
I've been exactly where you are before. I had no friends, which made me rely heavily upon my family to go out and do the things I wanted to do (skateboard, surf, do crazy shiz) and that ended badly because nobody ever wanted to do those things so I just ended up even more upset, lonely, BORED.
I say make some friends ASAP wherever it is you usually go during the day. They will SAVE YOUR SANITY. Then GO OUT with them!!!
Also, is there any way for you to make 200 bucks with no job? Do you have any money saved? Because if that's such a big driving force I feel like you can get it out of the way and get on with your life. In short, NO!! I do NOT think this is selfish of you, especially if you haven't been called birthname in years. I've been called LEGAL name for years and it always irritated the f out of me (even before I knew I was trans). Then I hit school this semester as a "girl" so I wouldn't "rush things" and it SUCKS and I wish they'd call me, Nathan, wish my school ID wasn't a miserable looking picture of me with long hair/legal name....... Names can play a big role in our happiness. Get your name out of the way, and get back in life!
I've been called all sorts of name, including 'HEMROID' I've been called boys names, girls names and Tinkerbell (frequently as a matter of fact) - its worth the money each and every time I cash the check.
Pride goes before the fall. I'd rather be with people who hate me than not with anyone at all. But that's just me.
I'm in the same situation almost. I don't have any friends really (home schooled) and the only people I talk with is at Church and the Church I go to isn't really open-minded to GLBT so going by my trans name there is kind of out of the question. The only open-minded friends I can make are online and most people I meet in chat rooms aren't friend material. I've become kind of a quiet, keep to myself person even when I'm around people. When I'm around new people I don't socialize much because I'm afraid they won't accept "me". I'm the same with the name thing..I'm not looking forward to getting a job and having to go by my "birth name". I love my family, it's just sometimes they get in the way of things and their interests are way different than mine. Oh well, I'll be happy if the friends I have someday, online or offline, will accept me as my gender
Quote from: trapthavok on October 24, 2008, 01:04:30 AM
that's no way to live bro :(
I've been exactly where you are before. I had no friends, which made me rely heavily upon my family to go out and do the things I wanted to do (skateboard, surf, do crazy shiz) and that ended badly because nobody ever wanted to do those things so I just ended up even more upset, lonely, BORED.
I say make some friends ASAP wherever it is you usually go during the day. They will SAVE YOUR SANITY. Then GO OUT with them!!!
Also, is there any way for you to make 200 bucks with no job? Do you have any money saved? Because if that's such a big driving force I feel like you can get it out of the way and get on with your life. In short, NO!! I do NOT think this is selfish of you, especially if you haven't been called birthname in years. I've been called LEGAL name for years and it always irritated the f out of me (even before I knew I was trans). Then I hit school this semester as a "girl" so I wouldn't "rush things" and it SUCKS and I wish they'd call me, Nathan, wish my school ID wasn't a miserable looking picture of me with long hair/legal name....... Names can play a big role in our happiness. Get your name out of the way, and get back in life!
i would be all for going out and making friends but I live in such a small town, you wouldn't believe and I'm know in my town and the surrounding towns as the freak or it.
no one will do anything with me except make fun of me and some ppl arent sure what I am and I'm afraid if i were ever caught alone of what might happen because so many ppl my age around here are drug dealers.
Check out your state's laws on names. In my state, it's legal to go by just your first initial + last name, even on official paperwork.
And go do something. Even if it's not something 'fun' - just find something you can get absorbed in. Get a job, or a hobby, or find somewhere to volunteer. Heck, even if you can't take going to school full time, hit up the local community college for a couple of courses. It's usually pretty anonymous (no one ever called on me in a community college class), you can get federal student aid to cover your expenses, and you may be able to get some academic credit for the future.
The only way to make life not boring is to find something to do.
Just my two cents.
Quoteit costs $210 to change it.
OMG, that's a lot! :o
Here, it costs half of that and I'm lucky, 'cause my mum did and would pay. :)
And, hell, I know how you feel, people calling me by my birth name= >:(.
I can't stand these reminders either. :(
I haven't got that many friends either but that's alright, I don't need fakes in my life. ;D
Hold on, smile for ickle Jörgen, it would make Jörgen's day (and hopefully your day too!). :)
AFA the money thing, there's ppw you can file called "In Forma Pauperis" (I'm too broke can you do this anyway) This can get you your name change for free.
Normally I am not big on people just taking like that but really, if it's gonna make you a productive member of society, do it. Just make sure you don't find another excuse dood.
Sorry to be blunt..
Start job with old name.... save money up... get name changed quit.. previous job.... get new job with new name... make new friends... go out.
Simple as..
Quote from: Jay on October 27, 2008, 06:17:17 AM
Sorry to be blunt..
Start job with old name.... save money up... get name changed quit.. previous job.... get new job with new name... make new friends... go out.
Simple as..
it depends. I actually started going by an asexual name a few years before I started expressing my gender and most places it was cool but one place the other employees took great pleasure in referring to me as my (very feminine) birth name (someone was being nosy and saw my former legal name on my paycheck, then spread it around). So you never know.
But if OP can find a job where that won't happen (say, where there is privacy and security about the paychecks) it won't be a bad deal.