In response to Goldy's thread about being a bioguy. Thought we should have our own.
Me - tits.
1) a horrifying fear of pregnancy, illness in my female parts, menopause, etc. it just doesn't seem part of me at all. and i never get anything checked on.
2) not having facial hair. i don't want to grow it, just want to feel stubble. i try to get it by shaving, doesn't happen...tell your female friends who are skittish about razoring their fuzz...it doesn't grow back thicker OR darker. (or maybe it's my native american, no facial hair genes! durnnit!)
3) when talking to someone i don't know at work, my voice gets all high and mousey... just happens when i'm trying to be accomadating. i can't control it.
i don't know if i'd ever want to go through operations but i do often really really want the hormones so i could shave my face and all. otherwise i do all i can on my own to change things. feels more like i'm walking around dressing up or being an actor 24 hours though.
Before T, I'd have said the same things - voice, period, tits. Now, it's just that my parts don't match and it leads to awkward situations, like bathrooms and change rooms. I always have that extra bit of stress.
Dennis
1. the monthly illness
2. chest
3. height/weight
4. voice
5. people trying to squeeze me into a certain social role
6. being treated as one expected to conform to that role
7. increasingly bothersome bottom dysphoria
8. feminine endearments
I could go on and on but I shan't.
Before T and Still now :-
Tits
Period
The contant reminder I dont have a penis
The fact I personally wont be able to have kids.
My weight/height.
My hands
My smile
I could go on and on and on and on...
Mostly just that it doesn't feel right. I don't hate anything about the female body or the female gender role. It just doesn't feel like me. It sucks not having my boy parts.
Uh... let me think...
I hate having to pack to swim. I hate making an impromptu overnight at my lady's place only to remember later that i didn't bring supplies to do my shot. I hate those weird situations where my old name is still on random records.
Packing isn't the thing I hate. The packer helps me. It's the fact that if I'm in the mood to have sex, I have to two cartwheels and sing the National Anthem before I'm ready to even get started. I've gotta make a girl wait because I don't have the proper tools.
...O CANADA
Tits/period/voice. Being stuck on the wrong side of chivalry.
What I hate most is nothing physical.
I hate that I must constantly prove over and over that I am just as good, and in some cases better, than any male at what I do (I work in IT, currently tier 2 server support. ) That my boobs and/or gender are not an intelligence indicator.
Physical stuff is much easier to fix.
WR
Just having the female body. Period, breasts, femenine voice, and when I get angry I act angry in a girly way which is uncontrollable for me. My parents raised me as a girl all my life and since it's not even been a year since I started identifying as male it's still hard to me to really act male. And that just because I have a female body that I should act like an average female. It's hard for me to even socialize because I know anyone I talk to sees me as female. It sucks
Quote from: Nero on November 20, 2008, 07:07:45 AM
In response to Goldy's thread about being a bioguy. Thought we should have our own.
Me - tits.
My soon to be 17-year-old daughter has said pretty much the same thing. But, that's about the extent of what she's mentioned thus far. I don't know how dysphoric she is in that regard. But she's mentioned numerous times she'd like to be rid of her breasts.
Who knows; I might have a TG daughter, though it still seems too early to tell.
My sister, even as a "natural" female, wishes she did not have (large) boobs. They get in the way of all sorts of things, such as exercising.
Quote from: kephalopod on November 20, 2008, 04:22:01 PMBeing stuck on the wrong side of chivalry.
Is there a good side to chivarly. To me, the whole idea of it quaint, and benevolent sexism is still ultimately sexism. That's not really good for anyone.
It's good for people to do favors for others, but it should be because we care about them as people, not because of the bits attached to them.
before T:
feeling "wrong"
monthlies
and everything below
now:
chest
height
fact i look a decade younger
not a bio-dude
Quote from: Kaelin on November 20, 2008, 08:38:11 PM
Is there a good side to chivarly. To me, the whole idea of it quaint, and benevolent sexism is still ultimately sexism. That's not really good for anyone.
It's good for people to do favors for others, but it should be because we care about them as people, not because of the bits attached to them.
I've got to apologize for my wording here. I picked a short facetious quip over a wordier spiel on gender and society when I probably shouldn't have.
I largely agree with your view of chivalry. (The idea that women need special treatment because they are women is inherently sexist.)
What I intended to say is that I find the social role that's been handed to me intensely uncomfortable in all its generalities and particulars.
Quote from: Windrider on November 20, 2008, 04:36:52 PMPhysical stuff is much easier to fix.
I beg to differ. Phalloplasty is not a "fix" for me. I want a transplant, and not only is it expensive, but no doctor in his right mind would do it.
Quote from: Elwood on November 21, 2008, 01:41:48 PM
Quote from: Windrider on November 20, 2008, 04:36:52 PMPhysical stuff is much easier to fix.
I beg to differ. Phalloplasty is not a "fix" for me. I want a transplant, and not only is it expensive, but no doctor in his right mind would do it.
And until the male dominated society accepts that boobs or the lack thereof does not indicate the level of the person's intelligence, my fight will *never* end.
I stand by my original statement.
WR
Quote from: Elwood on November 20, 2008, 02:45:19 PM
Packing isn't the thing I hate. The packer helps me. It's the fact that if I'm in the mood to have sex, I have to two cartwheels and sing the National Anthem before I'm ready to even get started. I've gotta make a girl wait because I don't have the proper tools.
...O CANADA
Its ok, I'd be waiting anyway... : \ (Lol...)
The lumps of doom and the parentals' refusal to let me get my hair cut. That's literally all that's keeping me from passing. Well the boobage can be dealt with, but the hair is the only thing that keeps me looking iffy. >:(
I'm starting to get bothered by my boobs more lately. At first I didn't mind them too much but for the last couple of months I'm getting annoyed by 'em.
And yeah, having a penis would be nice. And facial hair :D
The rest doesn't bother me too much.
i got the "looking a decade younger" thing too. i'm not on T at all, but a lot of my body and face looks boyish. boyish, not mannish.
which results in things like: me on airplane. lady next to me "well, hello! is this your first time flying alone?" me "Um...I'm 31." lady "you've flown thirty one times? you must be a busy young man." or lifting my luggage. "whoa...strong little dude!"
people say i should be thankful for looking younger but
a) i get talked to in a patronizing way, or people assume i don't know how to handle anything
b) OR sometimes people are very nice and sweet and i can tell they are impressed that a young person is so independent and smart. and then i feel bad about that, like i fooled them, or, inside, i think "well, i'm a lot older than they think and not special at all"
an interesting bonus is i get lots of free food all the time from older people who think i'm a growing young boy. (or they may know i'm a girl, but i swear i inspire that feeling...no one gives loads of food to 30 year old feminine women, right? or am i imagining that?) i could probably go 2 weeks without groceries.
sorry guys, i am wordy online. i don't get to talk about that stuff much i guess! :embarrassed:
voice
can't gain muscle mass (enough) no matter how much I work out
Fat distribution
Myles
Quote from: Shades O'Grey on November 20, 2008, 07:57:57 PM
Quote from: Nero on November 20, 2008, 07:07:45 AM
In response to Goldy's thread about being a bioguy. Thought we should have our own.
Me - tits.
My soon to be 17-year-old daughter has said pretty much the same thing. But, that's about the extent of what she's mentioned thus far. I don't know how dysphoric she is in that regard. But she's mentioned numerous times she'd like to be rid of her breasts.
Who knows; I might have a TG daughter, though it still seems too early to tell.
I was discussing this thread with my daughter. While she reiterated her antipathy towards her breasts, she insists that SRS is "never gonna happen." So, it seems she has mild dysphoria but no TG/TS leanings.
It would definitely be the parts down below. and since my poison (birth control) hasn't been working, i get bleeding and pms symptoms almost every day, all the time. and the unexpected surprises i find in my underwear. :icon_blah:
it's getting to the point where i'm getting extremely angry - hitting, throwing things, when it bleeds, cause it's not supposed to happen for one. at least with normal periods I know when the crap comes.
i fantasize about carving it all out with a knife, and doing all sorts of violent acts on it when it's out of me... using every kind of weapon on it, putting it thru a shredder, burning it, etc..
I have some nice nicknames for it.. slag, stabwound, piece of ->-bleeped-<-.. I truly despise it, it is my worst enemy. it must be destroyed!!!!
yeah i know i have some major emotional problems... i blame the twat.
I hate my hands too, Jay... they are ridiculously, and distinctly feminine.. oh well better than havin sausage fingers imo
yes i hate my chest too but since it can't even fit in an A cup, they arent a huge problem.. dont even really need a binder if i wear layers.
I hate how it's so feminine tho, i hate how women's nipples are so big and pointy.. :eusa_sick:
and i just hate the shape of my body.. it looks so fat and girly even tho I'm a normal weight.. i guess that's what you get when youre a woman.. fat...sigh..
sorry long post, need to vent
Quote from: northy on November 23, 2008, 02:28:09 AM
and i just hate the shape of my body.. it looks so fat and girly even tho I'm a normal weight.. i guess that's what you get when youre a woman.. fat...sigh..
I know what you mean. Before I realized what my problem was (TS), I was so freaked out by being "fat" that I would go for days without eating and all that ED crap... Then I realized I was a boy, started binding, and the feelings went away. Damn tits are the only things that make me feel fat anymore. Fat and gross. Ugh.
The Moobs, the period, pms, the loss of control over emotions every month, lack of penis, no beard, and the times my voice goes high or feminingly soft.
Oh and one more other thing I hate about being a bio girl. Being treated like a girl from your family members and friends. I came out to my friends and my mom and they act as though I never said anything
My hated things:
1. The bloody waterfall of doom.
2. The problems that occur around the time of the bloody waterfall of doom.
3. The opening where the bloody waterfall of doom falls from.
4. The organs from which the bloody waterfall of doom is produced.
5. The wide hips made for baby-harvesting that will not likely occur, resulting in my messed up knees (the hips widened at a fast rate and the alignment of my kneecaps is now off).
6. The hill-like flabby bits on the upper-body that don't seem to be related to the bloody waterfall of doom.
7. The voice that is also seemingly unrelated to the bloody waterfall of doom.
8. The inability to freak other guys out with urinal-to-urinal conversations. (Can't pee standing and can't enter the boys' bathroom.)
9. Upper-body underwear.
10. The general idea.
The way people treat me. I could deal with the physical aspects, but what always makes my dysphoria spike is being treated like a girl.
boobs. yuk.
I have a VERY feminine body. I have 36DD boobs, I'm curvy, short, and "cute"
I hate getting hit on by men all the time who seem to be fascinated by the two lumps of gross on my chest. Especially considering I prefer to hang out with guys, I think I've got just a buddy and it turns out they want to sleep with me. - This is definitely what depresses me the most. I just wanna be one of the guys =(
Quote from: Dawni on November 27, 2008, 08:24:07 AM
I have a VERY feminine body. I have 36DD boobs, I'm curvy, short, and "cute"
I hate getting hit on by men all the time who seem to be fascinated by the two lumps of gross on my chest. Especially considering I prefer to hang out with guys, I think I've got just a buddy and it turns out they want to sleep with me. - This is definitely what depresses me the most. I just wanna be one of the guys =(
I hear ya man..I just wanna be one of the guys too and I have the same femenine body thing. It sucks when you can't do much about it
Quote from: freespeechz on November 21, 2008, 07:00:23 PM
The lumps of doom and the parentals' refusal to let me get my hair cut. That's literally all that's keeping me from passing. Well the boobage can be dealt with, but the hair is the only thing that keeps me looking iffy. >:(
break out the scissors, nothing they can do about it then!
Quote from: Godot on November 27, 2008, 01:14:47 PM
Quote from: Dawni on November 27, 2008, 08:24:07 AM
I have a VERY feminine body. I have 36DD boobs, I'm curvy, short, and "cute"
I hate getting hit on by men all the time who seem to be fascinated by the two lumps of gross on my chest. Especially considering I prefer to hang out with guys, I think I've got just a buddy and it turns out they want to sleep with me. - This is definitely what depresses me the most. I just wanna be one of the guys =(
I hear ya man..I just wanna be one of the guys too and I have the same femenine body thing. It sucks when you can't do much about it
Same here. It sucks. I try to hide it with the types of cloths I wear and such but seems I still get clocked half the time. Binding chest presses breasts down but they go to far down torso to be taken as pecks. Loose shirt that comes over the top of the pants hide hips some but only so much.
Quote from: Aiden on November 27, 2008, 03:02:32 PM
Quote from: Godot on November 27, 2008, 01:14:47 PM
Quote from: Dawni on November 27, 2008, 08:24:07 AM
I have a VERY feminine body. I have 36DD boobs, I'm curvy, short, and "cute"
I hate getting hit on by men all the time who seem to be fascinated by the two lumps of gross on my chest. Especially considering I prefer to hang out with guys, I think I've got just a buddy and it turns out they want to sleep with me. - This is definitely what depresses me the most. I just wanna be one of the guys =(
I hear ya man..I just wanna be one of the guys too and I have the same femenine body thing. It sucks when you can't do much about it
Same here. It sucks. I try to hide it with the types of cloths I wear and such but seems I still get clocked half the time. Binding chest presses breasts down but they go to far down torso to be taken as pecks. Loose shirt that comes over the top of the pants hide hips some but only so much.
I can't pass at all, even if I bind and wear baggy clothes, my face gives me away totally.
Probably doesn't help that I wear a lot of makeup
but even if I was a bio-guy I'd still wear a ton of eyeliner
Or guyliner as it were :P
B4 top surgery. chest
B4 T. aunt flo
Hard to pick one thing out of the teetering pile, really, but often it's muscle strength. That might sound odd, but I'd dearly love to be stronger and have more stamina.
The curves, definitely and infinitely the curves! >:(
Like others have said the breasts. Also when my voice gets high pitched and overall being underestimated.