For over a year I was heavily involved in a crossdresser forum as moderator and administrator. Then I got burned out and left. I later joined another forum but it too was a crossdresser forum. Many of the friends I had made at the first place found a home at the second place. I declined the offer to moderate but kept fairly active. Then when I made the decision to fully transition I found myself feeling out of place there.
It was hard but I knew I had to find somewhere I felt more at home. Susan's Place has been that for me. It's so nice to be among so many wonderful people who know what it's like to be transsexual. While I am really close to many of the members at the CD place, only a couple could relate but none were transitioning.
I know what it's like putting together a comprehensive website such as this. It takes a lot of time and great insight. So I just wanted to say thank you to Susan for doing such a fabulous job with this website and to all who have found a home here that help make it what it is. Thanks to Susan's hard work and all the great people she has helping her keep it the way you have made this a place to call home sweet home. Nice job ladies! (https://home.comcast.net/~julimarie/image_files/emoticons/thumbs_up.gif)
Julie,
There are some good people here for sure. I'm glad you like it.
Cindi
I'm glad you found a home here Julie. I love your attiude you help me top stay up even when I'm having a down day. Thank you Juile.
This has been my home for 10 months now.
There are lots of good people here who really seem to care and want to help.
I know that I have went through a lot of ups and downs and have received love and got allot of guidance.
Yes Susan has done a great job creating, maintaining and continually improving this site.
I have to applaud her for all of her work.
:)
Jillieann
Ive ben visiting susans off and on for years :) Ive gained so much from the people here through the good and the bad. I love hearing about your experiances Julie and Im glad you joined the family *Hugs*
The people here at Susans have been my lifeline since I started tackling my ->-bleeped-<- head-on. I have never met a more caring group of people than what I have found here. And Susan, thank you for all you do to make this site as wonderful as it is.
Welcome home, Julie.
Chaunte
Well Susans is my lifeline as well during my current difficault times. I always enjoy chatting and conversing with the people here.
Hugs for All
Alice
I managed to somehow avoid "Susan's" all of my life, not sure how..... I only arrived less than 2 weeks ago. I guess I just didn't look in the right places during transition.
I have never found so many genuine and wonderful people in one place and the atmosphere is fantastic both for the lighthearted stuff and the more serious information.
Having been through a dark tunnel in my life, at which from times there seemed no escape, I realize how valuable a support this site provides both as an opportunity not only to find help, support and learn about other peoples experiences, but also to provide friendship during difficult and lonely times...
This place is the best, we should keep it that way and aim to make it better and better for everyone in the future....
Buffy
Buffy,
Wouldn't it have been great to have a resource like this 20 years ago? how would it have been?
Cindi
Hey Julie,
I also had a hard time fitting in, in crossdressers forums. Not that I don't understand thier plight, I do. It's just that so many of them are in the closet and plan on remaining there. Something that I presume can be done if one is a crossdresser.
I however, beleive that Transsexuality requires coming to terms with it, accepting it, and dealing with it. Because of this I end up in an impasse with crossdressers and particularly thier SO's who really don't want to hear what I have to say.
Here I can relate to what others are feeling and what is going on in thier lives. Thier stories ring true with me. I get that same feeling of home that you do. I really like it here at Susan's, this really is a wonderful site.
Love always,
Elizabeth
A resource like this 20 years ago :( It would have been salvation. Thirty years ago even better
Rana
We all need to remember Susan's is a Transgendered site. Including transsexuals and crossdressers. Most of the newest members seem to be transsexual and it follows that most of the posting lately has been related to that. Please keep this in mind in your posts.
thanks
beth
Quote from: Melissa on August 07, 2006, 11:53:38 AM
When I first came to Susans (I started lurking last October), it was about half and half with crossdressers and transsexuals with a few who were neither interspersed into the mix. After a few months, I was feeling like it was taking more of a crossdresser tone and I was feeling somewhat alientated, but during the past 4 or 5 months, it flip-flopped to a more transsexual tone and I have been feeling right at home ever since.
Melissa
Exactly Melissa,
We must be careful to not make the crossdresser members feel alienated now.
beth
Yes, Thank you Susan, you really did a great job for all of us, this is my home for the last 5 months and I have learned so much about TS from all of you.
If it wasn't all of you great members, friends, this site wouldn't be so good site. Thank you Susan, Thank you friends!! Love you all!!!
take care,
* :icon_hug:*
Michelle
Quote from: Melissa on August 07, 2006, 12:02:04 PM
As far as I'm concerned, it's up to the crossdressers to start posting crossdresser messages. I have no problems with that. I try to provide input where I can, but there is a limit to how much I can understand about them. Now that I think about it, it slowed way down once Shelley left in March.
Melissa
hmm - I do wish there where more cross dresses here to see how I relate to them. I am not to sure if being here has affected my mentality or if my emotional breakdown in the last few weeks would of happen regardless. I am having trouble these days holding onto my current throughts that I am a simple CD considering I have had depression etc in the last few months.
Shelly and Louise where the two CDs who I identified with when I first came into this site. Since that side of things has been very quiet I am very confused as to where I stand.
I guess if I had to sum up where I am at the moment it is the word 'afraid'. Since depression etc set in over the last months I have relised that standing still is going to be very hard. If i do need to move forward my whole life could turn upside down in the comming years - something that I do not want.
Alice
I think Louise is still around. I've also seen a lot of new crossdressers, but they usually don't seem to post more than a few posts. :-\
Melissa
I would be nice to have some more cross dresser to talk with.
But we are in the transsexual forum on this posting.
Is anything happening in the crossdresser forums?
Maybe someone should start a poll to see the what makeup of Susan's is.
I just recently switched camps myself. And yes I do miss Shelley too.
She was a good friend.
Alice please don't push yourself and don't let anyone her at Susan's push you. If you feel more comfortable as a cross dresser that that is what you are, at least for now.
Okay. Be yourself not what anyone else wants you to be. Take your time exploring that your TG has put you in. You don't have to figure out everything right now.
I care for you as a sister and I hard to she that you are hurting Alice.
PM me if you want and we can talk more okay.
I do love this place and all the great people we have here.
:)
Jillieann
Quote from: Alice on August 07, 2006, 06:46:42 PM
Quote from: Melissa on August 07, 2006, 12:02:04 PM
As far as I'm concerned, it's up to the cross-dressers to start posting crossdresser messages. I have no problems with that. I try to provide input where I can, but there is a limit to how much I can understand about them. Now that I think about it, it slowed way down once Shelley left in March.
Melissa
hmm - I do wish there where more cross dresses here to see how I relate to them. I am not to sure if being here has affected my mentality or if my emotional breakdown in the last few weeks would of happen regardless. I am having trouble these days holding onto my current thoughts that I am a simple CD considering I have had depression etc in the last few months.
Shelly and Louise where the two CDs who I identified with when I first came into this site. Since that side of things has been very quiet I am very confused as to where I stand.
I guess if I had to sum up where I am at the moment it is the word 'afraid'. Since depression etc set in over the last months I have realized that standing still is going to be very hard. If i do need to move forward my whole life could turn upside down in the coming years - something that I do not want.
Alice
It is sad when we loose contact with friends here at Susan's, but that is the nature of the site. We come and go and some even return, some just lurk. I think that it's up to us as current members to be encouraging and supportive of everyone. We are all equal members here, there is no quotas set for posts or topics. Remember that there are many, many guests who are just looking for information and advice without having to actively participate, and that's cool too.
Alice why not take the lead in this and start something, something that
YOU feel needs addressing, something that you need answers to. There is always a danger of divisions within a community, it's perfectly natural. Of course in doing this you will get advice from "the community" and from that you and others just need to separate the wheat from the chaff. Jilleann put it quite nicely.
Steph
Hi everyone,
I certainly don't want to alienate the crossdressers here. It's just that, here, there are also many transsexuals so there are people that I can relate to. When I am in a crossdressers forum, what I have to say just does not ring true with most of them. They are in a different place than me and going in a different direction. Some things are very similar, as we are all transgendered, but it is really nice to have people who understand what it's like to be transsexual. It is the diversity of Susan's that makes it special, not exclusivity.
Love always,
Elizabeth
Quote from: Steph on August 07, 2006, 09:29:01 PMAlice why not take the lead in this and start something, something that YOU feel needs addressing, something that you need answers to. There is always a danger of divisions within a community, it's perfectly natural. Of course in doing this you will get advice from "the community" and from that you and others just need to separate the wheat from the chaff. Jilleann put it quite nicely.
Steph
Steph, I tried this on a CD forum that had a TG/TS section. For almost a year I tried to generate interest and activity by being very open and honest in my posts. Some of the girls who were on the fence were extremely grateful but I was at the opposite end from most of them and further along than any of them.
When I told the girls at the CD forum I had to find something to fill the void one of them wrote me saying she cried thinking I would be gone from there forever. It made it harder to leave. But I still had to do this. That void inside me was filled when I realized how many people like me there are here. It's a feeling inside that logic alone cannot satisfy.
If new people coming here see this as a transsexual forum and they are not TS, they will most likely move on. CDs cannot understand our life anymore than we can theirs. I asked many of the girls at the CD forum, "Why would anyone want to dress as a woman but not be a woman?" Most often I got the reply, "I like my guy self." I just couldn't understand that.
I'm not trying to discourage anyone from trying to build up the CD section but there are limitations as to what one person can do. While the owner of the CD forum wanted to increase TS membership, she realized word of mouth alone could not do that. She needed to advertise and that cost money, money she didn't have.
We are all in this together. CD, TG, TS, it doesn't matter to me but when I need support or answers to my questions I have to be amongst TSs. That's who I identify with. But I will always be an active part of the entire community and not just the transsexual portion.
What do I consider myself? I crossdresser (I think) I just truely do not know.
I will tell you this thou, I have never felt alienated by any posts here. Religion & politics can get me going I am ashamed to say - but that is a completely different matter.
Actually I have felt uplifted by posts here, certainly not offended
Love
Rana
Hey there Julie & Rana.
I agree with both of your replies, and in fact there may not be a problem here as Rana pointed out. We simply have to respect others and forget this we/they attitude. It is rude to refer to anyone or any group that is reading posts here as if they weren't here by referring to them as "those", "they", and "them", it's impolite and borders on disrespectful, use their names or titles.
Susan's is a place that every member of our community can feel at home. And for many this site has become their home. It's up to us to keep it that way. :)
Steph
Quote from: Steph
Alice why not take the lead in this and start something, something that YOU feel needs addressing, something that you need answers to. There is always a danger of divisions within a community, it's perfectly natural. Of course in doing this you will get advice from "the community" and from that you and others just need to separate the wheat from the chaff. Jilleann put it quite nicely.
Well I should add that I have never felt alone here at Susans as I continue on my life's path. I have found there are many here that I have related to and I have made many good friends.
I am now looking outside Susan's to see what I have in comon with other CDs and to see how I relate to them. I may end up relising that I am indeed TS and this is the site for me. However I still do not wish to transistion - I have been a relativly happy male all of my life dispite my TG feelings and I would be happy if I could continue to live as a male. I want the choice that many in here have said they did not have and I need to ensure I get a balanced view of the TG spectrim.
Alice
Alice do what you need to do to find out where you fit in the transgender spectrum.
If you really need to. I'm not alway sure where I fit in but that okay with me.
I would sure hate to see you leave. :'(
You have helped me by expressing some of your fears and I'm sure you have helped many other people here too. I think you are a very strong person because you will face your fear were as some like me just usually hid them. You have helped me to face some of them.
Other may never say thanks but I will.
Thank you Alice I consider you my friend.
:)
Jillieann
Jilliean,
I am not leaving as I have learnt so much here at Susans and I have been able to face my fears.
You have also taught me a lot about how this whole life evolves. We both have faced similar fears etc and we are both looking for out place in this world. You are a great person who I will always consisder a friend. The friends I have made here is one of the reason I will never leave - I love to hear what everyone is doing.
I do feel it best however it I broaden my horizons to balance what I have found here.
Alice
Alice I'm glad you will be staying because Susan's is a better place because of you. :D
Your Sister TG,
:)
Jillieann
Sometimes I wonder.... why am I here? ;)
I don't know really. It is pretty fun to get everyone's insight. I know that I come off brassy sometimes and I certainly don't mean to do so.
Cindi
what am i ? cold lettuce? :D :D
sorry, CD, TG, TS to is all the same. Here is why for me:
I am a Transexual and if I had the money I would take the SRS in a ny minute.
with me so far?
because I Have not had SRS's nor had HRT that makes me a CrossDresser right?
This is the sad part of our predicament when we want to tailor our community to fit our specific needs and trim our tree to be just right, than we lose sight of the whole TG/TS forest. :(
What makes this forum works in my opinion is the mix the integration of CD, TS, TG, M2F, F2M Significant Others, straight friends, ...
because we talk about life issues in general and life happens to us all, if this was a forum just to exchange fashion or make-up tips versus hormone dosage tips I would understand the alienation factor.
So please think it over because otherwise we are talking about every body going to their respective corners ...if it comes to that well that is life however it seems to me that the reason why people feel like this is home is because is like in a home where your mom is a male your dad a female your brother a skinhead your sister is autistic and you are ... well you ;) All together. :)
this is my 2 dollars worth ( a buck isn't much anymore)
sheila18
Quote from: sheila18 on August 09, 2006, 02:31:47 AMbecause I Have not had SRS's nor had HRT that makes me a CrossDresser right?
sheila18
Being a TS, TG or CD is more a state of mind than what you do physically. I have been a transsexual all my life simply because I have wanted to be a girl all my life. A crossdresser likes to dress in the clothing of the opposite sex but would never want SRS. Some may want to dabble in hormones but I'll bet most who would wouldn't like having boobs when they wanted to go to the beach and look good for the babes. If you want to be on HRT and have SRS then you are a transsexual.
We are all here as we are part of a "Community"......The majority of us could be considered a minority in the eyes of the general population, lets leave it there.
I don't do labels.... TS, CD, Bi, TV whatever. I read the CD threads, the FTM threads and any I am interested in.
I post because I enjoy posting, I respond because I enjoy responding.......I enjoy reading about peoples feelings, experiences, hopes, desires and fears.
I have seen enough debates and antagonism around the merits of being TS v CD and others.... Lets not go there. I don't question why the FTM's want to be men, I admire them for that. If people enjoy dressing in Female clothes because it makes them happy, feel good... great
Whether it is physical, mental, curiosity or plain insanity that brings us to this forum, we all have a right to be here.
No one, group is better than anyone else, there is enough discrimination in the "real world" without bringing debates into a safe and happy forum for everyone.
Buffy
Already hacked off after a bad day.....
Quote from: Julie Marie on August 09, 2006, 06:07:26 AM
Quote from: sheila18 on August 09, 2006, 02:31:47 AMbecause I Have not had SRS's nor had HRT that makes me a CrossDresser right?
sheila18
Being a TS, TG or CD is more a state of mind than what you do physically. I have been a transsexual all my life simply because I have wanted to be a girl all my life. A crossdresser likes to dress in the clothing of the opposite sex but would never want SRS. Some may want to dabble in hormones but I'll bet most who would wouldn't like having boobs when they wanted to go to the beach and look good for the babes. If you want to be on HRT and have SRS then you are a transsexual.
Sheila,
What you just described is exactly what I TS would describe. I identify myself as a CD as I do not want to transistion. Why I want to wear skrts and dresses I do not know - it is something inside me that I can not control - wearing a skirt just makes me happy and is shows I have a big feminine side.
We had a big discussion a few months ago about the difference between CDs and TS. I do not want to go back to that debate as I still think we have a lot in common which is why I have been here for a long time. If you wish I can point you to those threads as so you have a better understanding of why I wish there where more CDs here at Susans.
Alice
I have a hard time discerning differences beetween TS, CD, whatever. For every person, there's a new level of creativity. That's how I see it... creativity. We create an image of ourselves and then try to climb into it. So when I think of us versus them, I have a real difficult time placing people in any kind of category. But for us it's some level of gender uncertainty and great creativity compared to just your plain old average normal person.
Cindi
julie:
thank you for agreeing, that was my point. ;)
LAbels and boxes is what got our community in the predicament we are among the general population.
So why have labels and boxes here? It makes no sense to me.
We are here because we identify and meet people who understand what we say and our experiences our "State of Minds" as julie said. Not because we "know the meaning of a labels" lets leave that to the scientists, is my opinion only, life will go where it will, i can't stop it am not god thank god :D
sheial18