Have you ever purged, Thrown out all your good stuff? If so why? Fear? Guilt? How long before you started collecting new things?
Oh, Ive done it...a few times...guilt and fear of being caught. I would delve back in evry 2 years or so.
I have more now than Ive ever had and actualy considered a purge recently. Dont know why. Im married and my wife is all for what I do. But the "man" in me sometimes surfaces and is very hard to deal with.
:-\
I think purging is one of those behaviors that is part of a crossdresser's natural progression. It's part of the maturation process. I purged often in my early years as a crossdresser. Later though, as I grew more comfortable as a crossdresser the need to purge abated. I can't speak for everyone but where I was concerned self acceptance eliminated that nagging need to purge.
Hugs,
Sally
Hello Sally and Rita. The "Urge to purge" has seen it's days. Never more. The last time it happened to me was not a voluntary act. I wanted my clothes and shoes but the lady who lived in my apartment with me got a restraining order because she was afraid I may take other things like my range , refrigerator, washer ,etc.She did not care if I dressed but she was upset and she knew that keeping my favorite things would upset me. Oh well ****happens. Actually she did me a favor. It's fun to start shopping again. I will never do it again on my own. When I was younger I thought maybe there was something wrong with me only to find I'm not alone. My wardrobe increased today. A lady friend has to get larger sizes so she gave two nice skirts. I think she should eat more. I'll feed her a bunch pizza and when her clothes no longer fit...... That sounds self serving but I might do it. I look forward to talking again. HUGS Genevieve
Hi All,
I think like many of you I too have purged, many times, and just like Sally, my wardrobe is now bigger then it has ever been before. If I were to purge now... WOW! That would be a pretty penny. :) I already know I would just start over again. The last time, I didn't purge everything either.
Why have I done it in the past? Mainly out of the fear of getting caught, I think. I also had the intention of "quitting" a couple of times, but that never lasted. :angel: Now that I live alone, I'm not nearly as worried about getting caught as I used to be. As long as keep everything put away, I really don't have much to worry about.
Patricia
I only purged once and that was when I got caught. I haven't built up a wardrobe or dressed in any significant fashion since then.
My advice is to never purge anything that can't be replaced. If you have something special that has a special significance then hold on to it. :)
Well, everybody can stand to clean out the closet now and then, but this is a bit different, of course. I've done it a couple of times back when I was struggling to conform to what I thought was the "norm". Later, I realized that while you can clean out your closet, you can never clean out your soul. I decided to face this part of myself, sort of the opposite of purging, to see where it goes. I'm still at it and I love it. Why purge something that brings you such joy?
Lyric, What is "norm"? I believe crossdressing is so common it is considered fairly normal behavior. Many years ago most psycologists determined it was not an illness. I have friend in Salt Lake City who was crossdressing at a young age and believed the if Deborah was ever found out they would use electroshock therapy to cure the disease. He/she Malcolm/Deborah was living in small town in Ohio.That's probably the cause of the extreme paranoia. It would be very interesting if all of the crossdressers in America came out of the closet. Even 50% would be a lot of people.
Purging happens to most of us at some time. I found it to be a waste of time and money because I just replaced what I discarded in due course only to do it all again.
These forums hopefully will guide others dealing with gender identity problems and help save time and money and heartache by reassuring people that it is normal to purge but that there is also another way and that is to talk to someone, anyone because purging is an inward emotion and does little for you in the long term.
I purged only one time - when I got out of the military and my family wasn't too supportive (specifically my mother). All of it, except the breastforms and a couple odds and ends that were not in the main trunk, went to Goodwill.
Well, I said I struggled to be what I though was the norm. I haven't seen any statistics, but I believe in a society where so many try to be just alike, it's really wonderful to embrace what is distinctive about yourself. Diversity is a very healthy societal condition, though can be difficult on the personal level, particularly for the young.
Quote from: Genevieve Swann on February 20, 2009, 02:59:25 PM
It would be very interesting if all of the crossdressers in America came out of the closet. Even 50% would be a lot of people.
I did some research once and found that 7% of all men feel the need to wear women's clothes at some point in their lives. That means in a city of 300,000 (kind of like where I live) there are 21,000 of us. Yes, that is a lot of people.
Have good cheer!!! By the time someone has gotten to one of these Board places, anything short of a court order, and not all of those, will not make us to purge. The only time I have done it was as a teenager with a sister who was going to be alone in our family home for a summer while I was on a "Boy" camp staff. Too late, she had already seen it and make life hell then, and recently outed me to other non-approving (but more accepting than she had thought) family members. Now I don't have a "secret life" and its actually a relief, I am angry, but now that I am getting used to it, the anger is dying. To get over the anger, I bought a nice new dress, and I love it!!
The folks for whom purging will be a big deal and happen often will never get here to talk about it, which is too bad.
I have only purged one time volutarily. The other times were when a hasty escape from bad relationship was needed and I could not get it all together quickly enough.