Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: kareema on February 20, 2009, 01:43:29 PM

Title: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: kareema on February 20, 2009, 01:43:29 PM
well im 20 yrs old been transitioning since i was 17 i feel that im very passable but when it comes to voice i can't get it down pack :'( I got the finding your female voice discs from deep stealth by andrea but still seems to not be helping, someone please help me with methods or something that could really help me or other voice therapy programs It's really depressing me  thanks, kareema
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: Janet_Girl on February 20, 2009, 01:51:35 PM
Tape recorder and Practice, Practice, Practice.  Also try finding a female vocalist that you like that isn't really high.  And sing along.  I use  Cher because I can march her almost note for note.  And it trains the voice.

Janet

Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: kareema on February 20, 2009, 02:02:30 PM
Ok kool i just got one the other day so did that help you? is your voice passable??

ps janet how do i put avatar pic on profile??lol
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: Janet_Girl on February 20, 2009, 02:06:57 PM
Yes my voice is very feminine.  And it took months to develop.  But it is worth it.

And you need at least 15 Posts to modify your profile.

Janet

Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: kareema on February 20, 2009, 02:10:37 PM
kool thanks well yeah i guess i just need to practice and more practice...so the best method is to sing along with female singer???
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: iminadaze on February 20, 2009, 02:17:41 PM
I used training discs and they were informative. But I got to go with Janet on this one,
singing along with female singers has helped me more than the discs.

I have been doing Peggy Lee's Fever, I sang it for my GF and she was Like  'what!'
She told me she didn't know I could get my voice like that, I told her neither did I.

Now I want a really nice gown so I can Vtape me singing it on youtube. I already have
the instrumental, now all I need the confidence...Oh, and the gown  :laugh:
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: kareema on February 20, 2009, 02:24:47 PM
lol ..yeah but thx janet and nicole for that advice i diffenately will be using that method , thanks
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: Sandy on February 20, 2009, 02:25:29 PM
I assume that you got the spectrograph program that came with the voice training CD/DVD.  That is one good tool to make sure that your timbre is in the right range.  And constantly reminding yourself to keep your larynx elevated to reduce your resonance.

Singing is a great way to learn the way to sound feminine.  But try not to strain your voice.  If it hurts, don't do it.

And yes, mucho practice.  Generally going full time is a great teacher.  ;)  And that very first time you get read as female on the phone without prompting is your graduation test!

But remember having a feminine voice is more than timbre and resonance.  It is vocal mannerism and vocabulary and sentence structure.  That is where a lot of practice comes in.  Listening to the way women speak is helpful, but here too is another place to practice.

Best of luck Kareema!

-Sandy
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: kareema on February 20, 2009, 02:36:43 PM
ok kool so im going to practice my little heart out until i get it lol thanks, ladies
If any more helpful advice my eyes and ears are open  ;D
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: funnygrl on February 20, 2009, 10:23:41 PM
Check out "CandiFLA" and her videos on 'youtube'. Good Luck :-*
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: Natalie3174 on February 20, 2009, 10:30:44 PM
The way I found my female voice was by pretending to be South American , french or Canadian. But Spainsh or latino girls helped me the most. THen I met Kat and loved her and she stared talking through me same with Jelissa jaconi.
Just copy other transsexuals you adore and it's like they come into allignment with your soul..
Beware this is dangerous.
Bri gave me my giggle.
It works well to have womens intuition with other transsexuals that see themselves as very feminine and pretty. Sexy helps too...Thats me-- Sexy.
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: V M on February 20, 2009, 10:43:14 PM
I sing along with Patsy Cline, Blondie, Siouxsie & the Banshees and a few others. I also learned to use a piano to match the general fem. vocal range. If you'd like to know more about that let me know. It's something I learned from singing lessons  :laugh:
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: kareema on February 20, 2009, 11:18:20 PM
hey virginia can you give me some of the methods you do that helped????
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: V M on February 21, 2009, 12:00:41 AM
Quote from: kareema on February 20, 2009, 11:18:20 PM
hey virginia can you give me some of the methods you do that helped????
Sure :laugh: Singing along with female singers is very helpful. So how do you reach those notes?
Things that help:
A piano or inexpensive portable keyboard w/a good piano sound (Guitars work well also)
A small pocket size recorder of some kind
An inexpensive acoustic guitar tuner

OK-Get busy-
Learn the A scale starting at A-3. That's the A just below middle C
Using the tuner, practice matching the notes of the scale. Start out with dif. sounds of the ABC's- Then words-Then sentences
Take the recorder and strike up conversations with women who have a nice voice you like. Ask a few questions and let them do most of the talking  ;)
Practice matching their Tone, Pitch and inflection and record yourself to check your progress. Notice the chirping sound of their voice? How they start and end sentences dif. from a man?

I hope that helps some :laugh: Keep us updated. I would like to know how it works out for you and anyone else who tries these methods  :laugh:
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: kareema on February 21, 2009, 12:27:54 AM
oh ok i will virginia thanks so much ;D
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: cindybc on February 21, 2009, 12:35:45 AM
Voice Training

The voice is very important at least just as important as your appearance if you are going to be credible to the folks you interact with everyday. I am only a small person so I never really had a very deep voice. the mode of exercises I used to bring my voice up closer to sounding like that of a feminine quality I just did mostly by humming tunes to myself, I could also hum tunes no mater where I was without bringing much attention. Let me introduce you to my little friend on this voice training you tube video, I thought it was pretty good way to train your voice and I have used it myself for fine tuning my voice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qbaj4tIX1kw#hq (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qbaj4tIX1kw#hq)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaxxEyZBgR4&feature=related#hq (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BaxxEyZBgR4&feature=related#hq)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7qSJ19f_QU&feature=related#hq (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7qSJ19f_QU&feature=related#hq)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EeBwNWETJ5o&feature=related#hq (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EeBwNWETJ5o&feature=related#hq)

Cindy
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: kareema on February 21, 2009, 12:37:31 AM
thx ;)
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: V M on February 21, 2009, 01:15:52 AM
Those are some really good videos. Helped to explain a few things that I couldn't quite explain in a short typing. And they are fun. Having fun is prob. the most important part  :laugh:
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: sd on February 21, 2009, 04:29:23 AM
I tried a few things, but what helped was as mentioned finding the right singer.

I think some the tapes and things make you expect something you aren't capable of, but if you find the right singer you can find where you are going wrong. I still have a long way to go, but I am not freaked out by it at least and I can see it coming around for me.  (YAY!)

Think of the videos and tapes and such as a learning tool, but an incomplete one. You need to find where your voice will work.

Belinda Carlisle and her live stuff with the Go-Go's works well for me. It was on some of that that things finally clicked and I understood it. Try various singers and songs, it was 2 songsin particular that finally helped me get it, but others were not even close at first.
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: helenr13 on February 21, 2009, 06:43:37 AM
I found this video helpful
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P22OZNjUdvQ&feature=channel_page#hq (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P22OZNjUdvQ&feature=channel_page#hq)
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: kareema on February 21, 2009, 12:57:58 PM
yeah i found that video helpful thanks
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: whatw on February 21, 2009, 08:30:40 PM
Quote from: Janet Lynn on February 20, 2009, 01:51:35 PM
Tape recorder and Practice, Practice, Practice.  Also try finding a female vocalist that you like that isn't really high.  And sing along.  I use  Cher because I can march her almost note for note.  And it trains the voice.

Janet

how do we find  a local female vocalist? i was thinking of doing vocal surgery or somthing?
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: Purple Pimp on February 21, 2009, 11:19:56 PM
Just to add my two cents, I think that for as important as pitch is, proper resonance is equally necessary (we can all think of examples that don't-sound-quite-right, like a high pitched voice that still sounds like a man because of the resonance, or the opposite of that, a low pitched voice that still sounds feminine, Bea Arthur being a good example).  The best thing I learned practicing my own voice is to learn how to control the muscles in the throat so that you're able to "lift" the voice box as you're speaking.  Over time, it takes less and less effort as you become accustomed to it (probably like the lowering of the larynx during male puberty becomes naturalized over time).

Lia
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: Beyond on February 22, 2009, 03:03:46 AM
I think most people that have problems with voice do so for psychological reasons.  I write the following several years ago:

QuoteHi all,

I thought it was about time that someone brought up the subject of psychological barriers to obtaining a female voice.  People have already beat to death the mechanics of voice, but rarely discuss the mental aspects.  I think these mental barriers are mainly responsible for people giving up on their voice.  Some may be asking why I placed this thread here and not on the open board.  Because I didn't want some anonymous posters derailing the thread and besides anyone who's serious about developing a female voice will have joined the forum already.

The first barrier occurs at the beginning: To try or not to try.  Due to fear, pride or other reason some people never even make an effort at all.

Next up is "What if someone hears me?".  Everyone has time alone to work on voice.  Talk to yourself in the shower or in the car coming to and from work.

Next hurdle is testing your voice on someone else.  You can submit voice sample to sites on the internet.  Not being a techie I just started testing my voice on unsuspecting family members.  I'll never forget calling my sister early on and fooling her with my new voice.  She said "You little Sh*t!" after I told her it was me.  This told me I was on the right track.  Voice is about taking chances.  You have to take chances if you're going to get anywhere.

The next BIG hurdle is your public debut.  This is when you go out and about as yourself and use your voice for the first time.  Stage fright threw me for a loop at first.  My throat would close up and I could only manage a whisper.  I just kept at it and eventually got past this.  I knew my voice in private was okay, I just had to get over my shyness.  This was not easy and took months.

WTF?  This hurdle came out of nowhere twice.  First, early on I was completely caught off guard how my personality seem to change when I used my new voice.  Of course that didn't happen, but my new voice was definitely more expressive and this led me to be even more open with people.  Don't be afraid of how you sound!  This is the real you finally being expressed, go with it!

WTF?-part 2  After having done lots of private practice and after I was starting to get over my stage fright I had another WTF moment.  At first it stopped me in my tracks.  This time my voice seemed to sound different than it did in private practice.  Once again the answer was to persist and overcome.  The term I use for this is to take "ownership" of your new voice.  Your new voice is YOU.  Your voice is a conduit for not only your thoughts, but emotions and your state of mind.  Let yourself go, stop monitoring yourself!  Your old voice is the enemy.  Again it took me a period of months to fully integrate this lesson.

Don't give up!  I told myself at the beginning that failure was not an option.  Sometimes I took a break, but I never gave up.

Tape Recorder Fiasco-A tape recorder may work for a lot of people but it almost halted my journey.  I was devastated how bad I sounded when I played the tape back.  I took a break and went out to a movie.  After thinking about it for a bit I never used the tape player again (It eventually got sent to another forum member).  After that I went strictly by ear (80%) and feedback from others (20%).  If the tape player doesn't work for you, don't be afraid to try something else.  There's more than one way to skin a cat.

1.  Be patient

2.  Be persistent

3.  Appreciate how much work voice is psychologically.  Mechanics is only a small part of the total project.

4.  Practice, practice, practice and then practice some more.

5.  Take ownership of your new voice.

6.  Never give up.


I hope this helps somebody out there dealing with their own hurdles.

Don't psyche yourself out.  Just do it.

Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: Soapyshoe on February 22, 2009, 12:06:16 PM
Beyond, thanks for reposting this.  Like ALL of transition, your voice is no different.  It's about expressing yourself (a TRUE FEMALE) through your voice.  The self-conscious man just has to let go, and that's probably why people struggle so much with their voice.

When your outer voice changes, your inner voice changes too.  This is incredibly disorienting.  Because the male voice inside MUST go, and when he's gone, you've crossed a psychological barrier that you probably won't come back from.  Read about NLP, voice hypnosis, and other stuff like that to understand what to expect when your "inner voice" changes.  As you begin thinking in a female voice, your entire experience of the world will change, and this can be really uncomfortable, disorienting, and disconcerting if you're not ready. 

I'd like to summarize here what it takes BEYOND just listening to one CD and practicing:
1. Auditory feedback.  You need to listen to youself in a tape recorder so that you can get the sound you want.  You've got to let others hear your voice and critique it.  Take this criticism literally, and get it from somebody who is reasonable, not stupid, and wants to help you.
2. Speech Therapist.  Probably a good person to get PROFESSIONAL feedback from.  In fact, I think this is extremely underrated in terms of passability goes.  It costs money, but the psychological benefit of a voice is enormous.
3. Imitate female voices.  That's how women learn to talk the way they do.  Sing, laugh, BE the female voice.  Get tons of voice clips (download a program called HiQ Recorder for free, rip audio in MP3 format from Internet streams like Youtube.)  Imitate the clips that approximate the voice you want.
4. Experiment.  Voice lessons are good to get you experimenting and learning how that complicated meat instrument (your voice box) works.  But YOU have to experiment with YOUR OWN instrument until you've mastered it.

To transition successfully, you're going to have to learn to do things that the AVERAGE person will never know how to do.

P.S. Writing this post just made me think of a profile signature.



P.S.S.  Think about how long it takes to get good at the guitar.  You pick it up, it makes no sense.  You female voice is no different.

You figure out a few chords (start to sound remotely female) and can play along to some easy tunes.  You play, and play, and practice, and practice, and eventually you sound competent (have a reasonably female voice) but it still takes a lot of effort.

In the end, you go see a guitar teacher (vocal specialist, hopefully a good one) and they set you straight, based on their years and years of experience teaching people.  Practicing with their new tips and advice, you sound like Jimmy Page (you reflect your true inner female with your voice).  In other words, if you're driven to have a better female voice, then seek out knowledge of the voice until you have your breakthrough.  If you give up because "you just can't do it", then you'll never reach your goal.

Example: I've been playing guitar since I was 17.  I went through the above process.  I always wished I was better at guitar and could play super-fast lead parts.  I wish I knew more popular songs.  Up to this point (age 25), I never had the motivation to practice.  Guitar has become a hobby, and I'm okay with that.  I express myself as best I can, I sound good, and I have fun.  MY FEMALE VOICE IS NOT LIKE THIS TO ME.  I will spend YEARS working on my voice to perfect it.  I will see a specialist.  I will purchase every female voice DVD there is.  Guitar is nothing compared to my desire to have a BEAUTIFUL female voice.  In fact, I probably picked up guitar as a substitute for my inability to develop a female voice.  The female voice is the real deal for me, and it's an instrument I am absolutely driven to perfect.

P.S.S.S. There's nothing more fulfilling than expressing yourself, whether it be through a musical instrument or your own voice.
Title: Re: Being M2f and not sounding like a female?? help please
Post by: chrysalis on February 24, 2009, 11:08:24 PM
Awesome post, thankyou!