hi there, this may have been posted before by someone else.
I am having speech therapy and my therapist has asked me to listen out to the different words women use in a conversation to that of men. For the life of me I have listened and I can't see that much difference. it may be the circles I live in, lol. Not that brash, no swearing (hardly any), etc.
Any help would be great
hugs
Stardust
You mean these words?
OMG OMG OMG!!
Look at those CUTE shoes, earrings, necklaces...etc
Oh she is so pretty
She is my girl crush...
My breasts are tender.
I feel crampy.
I have SOOO got to get my nails done.
Omg I am having SUCH a bad hair day.
I cannot believe she is wearing that.
Cute shoes, where did you get those?
Can I borrow that top? Dress...etc...
My boss is such a jerk
That movie was SOO retarded
I'm so sorry
Quote from: stardust on May 03, 2009, 01:57:05 PM
hi there, this may have been posted before by someone else.
I am having speech therapy and my therapist has asked me to listen out to the different words women use in a conversation to that of men. For the life of me I have listened and I can't see that much difference. it may be the circles I live in, lol. Not that brash, no swearing (hardly any), etc.
Any help would be great
hugs
Stardust
Although targeted for writing... gender genie is an interesting exercise... I typically take advantage of it for dialogue in my own fiction.
http://bookblog.net/gender/genie.php (http://bookblog.net/gender/genie.php)
That will give some indication of word choice differences.
"Tummy" and "yummy" are two that always leaped out at me.
i et such odd results with that, my male narrated stories all come out as female and my female narrated all come out as male and my non-fiction comes out as in the middle, weird ol' site
Quote from: Pica Pica on May 03, 2009, 06:06:45 PM
i et such odd results with that, my male narrated stories all come out as female and my female narrated all come out as male and my non-fiction comes out as in the middle, weird ol' site
LOL - mine pretty much too - but just about all my friends I have tested that are clearly and genetically on one side of the gender divide get results which match their gender. Anyone gender queer, androgynous or trans get unclear results.
I've personally found that guys [straight guys?] tend not to say 'adorable.' I mean, they might, but it's very very rare and it has to be when there's a female present, I think. I don't think guys would say 'adorable' if they were amongst themselves with no women present. Same thing with 'cute.'
Also, "god I look/feel fat" and "no I can't eat that I'm counting calories."
This is from a BBC brain sex ID article, they have a whole series of them and an online test thing. Maybe I'm weird, but I found the test and the articles all pretty interesting:
QuoteThere is no evidence of vocabulary sizes differing between men and women, but women have demonstrated the ability to recall more related words under a time constraint.
Women's verbal skills appear to begin early in life. Studies of children's behaviour have found that girls speak earlier, have larger vocabularies and are better at spelling and reading.
Research has also shown that young girls are less likely than boys to use dominant, imperative language "Stop it," "Don't do that," instead preferring to say "Would you mind not doing that?"
Baron-Cohen suggests that because women tend to be better empathisers, the language they use is more emotive. For example, if a women disagrees with someone, she would often soften the blow by saying "You're right, but maybe it could be...". Whereas a man's response is more likely to be "I'm sorry but you're wrong," or even more direct "You're wrong."
And from another page on the BBC site:
QuoteWomen are said to use both sides of the brain when doing verbal tasks while men mainly use their left side.
Which is especially interesting (to me) because they seem to be citing pre-natal testosterone levels as a possible reason for the difference in verbal processing.
Word choices are important, but some of the most important things are, resonance, pitch, enunciation, modulation.
Men speak in a somewhat monotone style, and make emphasis with volume.
We speak in a more modulated voice, showing emphasis with body language that is freer than men's body language, and by modulating our voices.
We pronounce the letter s in a verrry essssse way, with the tip of the tongue just behind the top front teeth. Not many men do this (thisss).
Men have their shoulders squared, or physically occupy a whole space, spreading out their limbs, and show dominance behavior.
We make fluid gestures with our hands, and use facial expression as a huge part of our communication. Most straight men do not.
Most women's faces are relaxed, and so our voices are more relaxed. Men are always on the defensive or offensive, and speak in abrupt, staccato-like sentences, almost punching out the words.
That......and a million other nuances separate our communication from that of men's. The most important thing, is to speak female all the time. Every ticking second, minute, and hour of speech should be female, unless you are not full time, or if it is painful. You transitioned your body, or are, I presume, so (my opinion) you should also transition your voice. Everyone wants it right now, but it takes time. It would be like wanting "insta-breasts" in your very beginning transition. But it takes lots of time, and so will your voice.
Good Luck!
Bev
I swear all of the time. LOL I guess it depends on the age group. Different women of different age groups will speak differently.
I don't have a problem speaking in person or on the phone, I usually don't get called sir. I don't really know what I do. *shrugs*
there's a lot too it, I just kinda soaked it in. Plus, I was pretty effeminate before -- I wore make up before even transitioning! (yeah, out in public!) o_0
But, yeah, take your time and try to soak in what you can. You start to pick up on a lot of language and body cues over time. Be patient, and enjoy the ride.
--natalie
--natalie
Quote from: stardust on May 03, 2009, 01:57:05 PM
hi there, this may have been posted before by someone else.
I am having speech therapy and my therapist has asked me to listen out to the different words women use in a conversation to that of men. For the life of me I have listened and I can't see that much difference. it may be the circles I live in, lol. Not that brash, no swearing (hardly any), etc.
Any help would be great
hugs
Stardust
Yes, that is true. Some just don't get it though.
I have a very passable TS friend who looks female but her presentation and opinions come out in a very male way. She has a short temper, swears and really gives herself away when she wouldn't otherwise be read visually.
Quote from: Naturally Blonde on May 04, 2009, 07:25:47 AM
Yes, that is true. Some just don't get it though.
I have a very passable TS friend who looks female but her presentation and opinions come out in a very male way. She has a short temper, swears and really gives herself away when she wouldn't otherwise be read visually.
Hmm....I can get verry pissed once in a while, and swear like a sailor(usually, I'm more refined ;D) but even then there is no mistaking that I'm female.
I can say, "I hate this f*c**ng ->-bleeped-<-!", and no one mistakes me for male.....just a woman with a temper, and suspect breeding.
My voice as such is fine when I speak, if anything, I suppose a little monotone at times but that's getting better. I pass even when speaking and I live full time and work full time too. I suppose its just trying to refine what I already have and I thank you all for your help. Please keep replying with your thoughts as its been really, really interesting to read your thoughts on the subject.
hugs
Stardust
women in politics with the exception of Sarah Palin seldom use "girl speak" like OMG
Quote from: pheonix on May 03, 2009, 02:02:58 PM
Although targeted for writing... gender genie is an interesting exercise... I typically take advantage of it for dialogue in my own fiction.
http://bookblog.net/gender/genie.php (http://bookblog.net/gender/genie.php)
That will give some indication of word choice differences.
I tried it out on the manuscript I had started last year.
Words: 5092
Female Score: 6653
Male Score: 6269
The Gender Genie thinks the author of this passage is: female!
| Analysis |
| Feminine Keywords | | | | | | Masculine Keywords |
| "with" | 27 | x | 52 | = | 1404 | "around" | 5 | x | 42 | = | 210 |
| "if" | 13 | x | 47 | = | 611 | "what" | 17 | x | 35 | = | 595 |
| "not" | 47 | x | 27 | = | 1269 | "more" | 9 | x | 34 | = | 306 |
| "where" | 9 | x | 18 | = | 162 | "are" | 12 | x | 28 | = | 336 |
| "be" | 23 | x | 17 | = | 391 | "as" | 29 | x | 23 | = | 667 |
| "when" | 21 | x | 17 | = | 357 | "who" | 15 | x | 19 | = | 285 |
| "your" | 11 | x | 17 | = | 187 | "below" | 0 | x | 8 | = | 0 |
| "her" | 72 | x | 9 | = | 648 | "is" | 21 | x | 8 | = | 168 |
| "we" | 12 | x | 8 | = | 96 | "these" | 3 | x | 8 | = | 24 |
| "should" | 0 | x | 7 | = | 0 | "the" | 258 | x | 7 | = | 1806 |
| "she" | 142 | x | 6 | = | 852 | "a" | 160 | x | 6 | = | 960 |
| "and" | 127 | x | 4 | = | 508 | "at" | 22 | x | 6 | = | 132 |
| "me" | 8 | x | 4 | = | 32 | "it" | 65 | x | 6 | = | 390 |
| "myself" | 1 | x | 4 | = | 4 | "many" | 5 | x | 6 | = | 30 |
| "hers" | 0 | x | 3 | = | 0 | "said" | 12 | x | 5 | = | 60 |
| "was" | 132 | x | 1 | = | 132 | "above" | 0 | x | 4 | = | 0 |
| | | | | | "to" | 150 | x | 2 | = | 300 |
>:(When I speak in person I am very softly spoken and sound female
But on the phone or in my videos I sound like a male (->-bleeped-<- I'll have to stop making video and using the phone ) :angel:
Well, I have to give GenderGenie a ringing endorsement. I plugged in a dozen writing samples of fiction and non-fiction that I had written over the last 30 years, and it concluded every one was written by a female.
Yeah the genie was one of the first things I tested when I was first thinking about this, and no surprise it decided I was female based on my fiction writing, by a decent margin. Even when I plugged in stories where I was attempting to write a male-minded male character, it said female. I mostly write stories about girls anyway (was kinda of my way of being virtually trans without any of the risk).
Also, there's definitely no reality to the 'girls don't swear' idea.... BUT girls do tend to swear *differently*, I think. Basically, don't swear like a frat boy watching a football game when his team is losing. And when using the S-word, it usually gets the high note, as opposed to with guys where with guys it's kind of muttered on a lower note.
Some of it is regional. I went to a voice coach at first. She is from Georgia and told me things I recognize as very southern but probably aren't as obvious here (voicing a statement as a question, for example). I live in the American west, where most women don't talk like that.
Is it words or is it manner of speech? Probably both, but I think more manner. Men are outward, pushing, thrusting and parrying. Women are inclusive, relating, trying to find connection. Men tend to have a protective shell, a carapice. Women tend to be more open, receptive. Speech reflects these things. Listen (another non-masculine trait).
Early on (actually, even earlier on, since I'm still early on now) I was talking to a friend, worrying about my voice. He said: Oh yeah, everyone always thought my mother was a man on the telephone.
- Kate