huh? what the heck is LMGTFY????
weeeel... Let Me Google That For You. (http://www.lmgtfy.com/?q=lmgtfy)
good for a laugh :laugh:
Oh my I've heard of that before :D, so funny! :laugh:
I like that.
I also Really love PEBCAK (problem exists between chair and keyboard).
And RTFM (read the frigging manual!)
Brilliance! :D
Jay
"Helpdesk? Yes, this is Syne. User's problem is fixed. Yes, it was just a nut loose on the keyboard."
And most of the L-User's never got it.
Oh the stories from doing tech support :laugh:
I had one guy that bought 48 of our systems because supposedly he ran a porn site. I ask him why he thought it necessary to purchase 48 systems. Turns out he didn't know you could put more then one HD in a system! This was about 8 years ago when 40 gig drives were top of the food chain.
If he was telling the truth it only goes to show any idiot can do porn.
New employee: Hi, Is this the IT Dept?
Me: Why yes it is. What can I do for you today?
New employee: Hi, I've run out of mouse pad and I need to click the top right of my screen
Me: :icon_omfg:
I once read what was supposed to have been an actual help desk call in which the user said their computer screen was black. After asking a few questions, the support person asked the user to make sure the switch was on. The user replied that they couldn't tell because it was too dark. When asked why, the user said the power was out. :o The support person supposedly told the person to put the computer back in the box and return it. The user asked if the computer was broken beyond repair. The support person said, "No, you're just too stupid to own a computer!" :icon_lol:
I have no idea if the story is true or not, but it's certainly funny. :laugh:
Quote from: Starr on May 20, 2009, 03:43:16 PM
I once read what was supposed to have been an actual help desk call in which the user said their computer screen was black. After asking a few questions, the support person asked the user to make sure the switch was on. The user replied that they couldn't tell because it was too dark. When asked why, the user said the power was out. :o The support person supposedly told the person to put the computer back in the box and return it. The user asked if the computer was broken beyond repair. The support person said, "No, you're just too stupid to own a computer!" :icon_lol:
I have no idea if the story is true or not, but it's certainly funny. :laugh:
We had an incident similar to that. A customer had previously owned an old imac, you know, the all in one systems? Any way she bought a new PC from our company and could not for the life of her figure out why the computer wouldn't come on when she pressed the power button just below the screen. After more then 20 minutes on the phone with her explaining that the tower and the monitor each had their own power supply we to discovered she had never plugged anything in. The guy handling the call couldn't convince her that this was normal so in the end he told her to go ahead and return it for a full refund. She says "So you admit it is defective!!!" to which he very calmly replied. "Well no, but there is a certain level of intelligence required to properly operate a computer and I feel that it may be a bit to advanced for you at this time."
She agreed feeling like she had won and sent it back.
ROTFL. In that case, I suppose there's a decent chance the story I heard is true. I know there are stupid people out there, but I really didn't think they were THAT stupid. :laugh:
QuoteWell no, but there is a certain level of intelligence required to properly operate a computer and I feel that it may be a bit to advanced for you at this time."
Then there is the help desk "experts" that can not speak English and tell you to do dumb things and then pass you to someone else.
At work we like to tell people they have an ID-10T error.
You can always tell when the head of my dept has been using the computer. We have to wipe the white out off the screen.
Cindy.
ROLF means?
I think NASA had a LTRS, for a Lunar Terrain Removal System, otherwise known as a spade / shovel
Quote from: CindyJames on May 21, 2009, 03:59:17 AM
ROLF means?
ROTFL--Rolling on the floor laughing. Sometimes you'll see ROTFLMAO--Rolling on the floor laughing my a** off.
This thread is reminding me of the windows 3.1 error..
"Keyboard not detected, press F1 to continue."
I've referred to them as Mouse Driver problems...
They were never the wiser.
-Sandy
this thread is full of lol
:D
About 3 weeks ago I handed out a dozen notebooks to remote users (salesMEN of all things). One called to say he couldn't get his mail, so I asked if he was connected to the internet and he said 'No'. He was in a Starbucks that charges for a connection and he didn't want to pay.
I made him pay them.
Then a couple of days later, another guy called with the same issue. I said, are you at Starbucks? He said yes. He knew he had no connection but he still wanted his mail to work. In his case, he refused to pay for the connection and he waited until he was at a Panera's
:laugh: I guess it just goes to show how successful web app developers have become at blurring the line between desktop and web apps. Or even scarier that some people are really that clueless.
I guess it'd be like me working on a car though. ::)
Tales from the field... bedtime stories for IT helpdesk personnel
Double-Click on My Computer
I was on a call with a lady who was having Internet connectivity issues. I listened to her describe what was happening and was just starting to guide her through a few things to try to find the problem. I asked her to double-click on My Computer to which she replied, "How can I double-click on your computer?" I had to hit mute and collect myself because I didn't see that one coming.
650 MB = 832 KgB
Worker: So, with this software I'll be able to burn my own CDs?
Me: That's correct.
Worker: Now, I see some information here at the bottom when I add a new file... what does KB mean? Is that how many Kigabits it can hold?
Me (repressing laughter): No, I think you're thinking of gigabytes, which are "GB." "KB" means kilobyte.
(To this day I use kigabits as my preferred unit of storage. Kilobytes are just overrated.)
I Love You
We were hit by the ILOVEYOU virus back in 2000. I was working at a large oil company, supporting the refineries and would get calls from people that worked at them when they had a PC problem. There was usually only a small number of PCs and the users were the refinery workers. They were usually gruff guys, but not altogether impossible to work with. So, this particular day I get in and we are notified of the virus and to expect calls about it. I get a call that goes like this:
Me: Help desk, this is Ben, how can you help you?
Worker: Yes, I'm not sure if you're the one I need to talk to about this; but there's this guy here that ... well, umm, maybe he's one of those types – you know what I mean. I don't know... but he's sending me emails saying he loves me and, well, I just am not like that and I want him to quit it.
Me: Oh, I see, well sir, I don't think it's quite like that, you see we were notified this morning that we've been hit by the ILOVEYOU virus. This computer virus causes emails to show up like they are from someone and the email says "I love you" in it. So, you see, this person that it's coming from is not really saying that to you; it's the virus sending the message.
Worker: Oh, I see, well I sure am glad I called because I was liable to go give that feller a piece of my mind; I don't take too kindly to that kind of thing.
Shake It, Baby
In the early 2000s, Jan was administering a small network of Windows 95 PCs. The internal mail was Microsoft Mail running on an ordinary workstation. When Jan arrived, he was told that they were still on Windows 95 and Microsoft Mail because "it had been working for several years and there's no money for an upgrade."
Except that it wasn't working. The mail was hilariously unstable. Sometimes the "server" wouldn't work, sometimes the clients couldn't see the server... and no matter what, you'd have to reboot your workstation at least a half dozen times a day just to get it to work. The staff wasn't happy about it, but they begrudgingly accepted it, learning to reboot their systems every time they went for a drink of water or on a break.
That is, except for Kelly, the owner's wife and "Creative Chief." She was the only one that would continue to call Jan for support, knowing full well that she'd always get the same response. "Did you restart yet?" To which she'd say no, reboot, and then thank Jan when it was working again. This would happen again in an hour or two with the same dialog. And again two hours later. And on and on.
Will it ever stop? Yo, I don't know. But Jan had a plan to play a little joke on Kelly. The seventeenth time she'd called about email issues that week, he had a different response. "Hi Kelly, I think I found a problem with your laptop – a byte has become stuck on your hard drive. Usually you can just shake it loose." Jan expected a chuckle, but got an "OK." Kelli shut her laptop down, undocked the computer, shook it, redocked it, and started it up again. And it worked! To be fair, it might have had more to do with a restart than clearing the byte clog.
From that day forward, her days were brighter. Jan got less calls, Kelly perfected her technique of resolving stuck bytes, and her colleagues had fun trying not to laugh whenever Kelly undocked her computer to shake the bytes loose.
Mom struggles the entire morning trying to get her internet to work. She's checked all the settings, rebooted the main connection, restarted her computer several times. Finally she begs me to get up and take a look at it to see what's wrong.
I quickly assess the situation.... And turn the internet connection button to the "On" position. :D
the 'shaking the computer' story reminds me of an old Dilbert strip-- they tell the boss to do that to his laptop that's locked up. After he walks away shaking his laptop, Wally says to Dilbert "Do you think he'll ever realize we gave him an Etch A Sketch?"
Quote from: Jessica L. on May 22, 2009, 02:22:24 PM
the 'shaking the computer' story reminds me of an old Dilbert strip-- they tell the boss to do that to his laptop that's locked up. After he walks away shaking his laptop, Wally says to Dilbert "Do you think he'll ever realize we gave him an Etch A Sketch?"
When I was promoted to the manager of my tech support department, my kids bought me an Etch-A-Sketch as a gift.
I still have it at my desk.
It still works fine.
-Sandy("...you stop the computer by pressing the Start button? ? ?")
www.thewebsiteisdown.com (//http://)
this video is powered by pure win!
I worked for a few years at a big electronics company, on Sunday the techs were off and they would often put though calls to us back in the car stereo install bay, amazing the number of problems that were solved by step one. Is it plugged in?
Not sure I should post this :embarrassed:
I run several large analytical machines. We pay for 24/7 service at a great cost. I'm well versed with th machines with 30 yrs operation.
One went down and my tech called me. I went through everything, including checking it was plugged in. Couldn't get it to work. CAlled a service engineer, who expected the worst, 'cos he knows my experience. After several minutes he also checked the plug, turned the plug power on. Smiled at me and walked away laughing
:embarrassed: :embarrassed: :embarrassed:
Cindy