Hi everyone! I am new to susans forum, and I came out on Sunday. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done. Anyway I am in England where it is sunny at the moment, in Beautiful Devon.
We are surrounded with beauty! :D
Welcome Helena. Coming out is one of the hardest things to do, but each time gets easier.
How wenderful that you are surrounded by beauty in a beautiful time in your life. :)
- Kate
Hi Helena, :icon_wave:
Welcome to our little family. Over 2500 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.
Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams. Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.
But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another sister. :icon_hug:
And be sure to check out
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Janet
Hi Janet,
It's really nice to be with people who understand here at Susan.org.
I came out as transgender a week ago. I haven't found anyone to "hang" with and help me transition, while the people who support me don't think I am transgender, and don't want me to express my true feelings. I don't know how to put on eyeliner properly and people could help so much. I let lots of people know and even then there wasn't always the right time to say anything and it's hard. I don't think it's hard to say who you feel you are, it's just that people may reject it or even you or be hostile. I have a couple of really cool friends who are so supportive which is more than some people.
Truth is I am surrounded with beautiful people who are on different levels of acceptance or non acceptance of who I am.
As far as transitioning goes, are there any suggestions, because it feels like I have made no headway and I am still wearing male clothes because I am expected to and not even putting make up on etc etc. Since I came out nothing has changed, well nothing at all has changed even? Thank you for your help!
;D
Hi Helena.
People will react differently. Some will be enthusiastic for you and others will be "that's nice - what else is going on." Mostly this is is FAR more important to you than to anyone else. I would have to keep reminding myself of that.
If you can find a professional to talk to - a therapist - it will help you a lot. If you can find a support group in your area, that will be a big help, too.
You can only rely on your friends for so much. Most people have no experience with TG issues. You may be the only TG they've ever met. But be a good friend to your friends - you'll need them as you go along even if they don't know and aren't interested in how to put on eyeliner.
Good luck. This can be an exciting, scary, thrilling experience.
- Kate
Hi Helena
Welcome :) I wish you lots of good luck with transitioning. I'm sure things will change, even though it might be changing slowly right now ^^
Hi girl! Welcome to the forum. Hang out here as long as you wish :).
Congrats on your coming out, Helena. Welcome to Susan's.
Gennee
:)
Hi everyone,
:) Thank you for supporting me and all the replies. I have met some really cool people and they have been really supportive. There was the girl who is now a qualified herbalist working at the doctors. And all of you and my OT friend who has been so good. It really makes a difference.
What is coming out, and how should it be done, for nest results. It would be better with a female to try to "pass" of venture out. I know some people can be shocked or even antagonistic and I would probably prefer some female company at that time. I am taking everything so slowly, but it is making me impatient.
My friend from my Spanish class has been so good and I feel she can help me with this, I don't know.
Thank you for all your replies and I hope to hear from you again soon.
Santa Helena
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Amor no es aquello que queremos sentir - sino aquello que sentimos sin querer
Love is not something we want to feel – it is something that when we feel it, we don't want to.
Hi Helena and welcome to susan's.
What I'm doing is baby steps in order to get others used to me, what i mean by that is i started by wearing woman's jeans then a month or so later added woman's tennis shoes then clear nail polish and now everything i wear is woman's, others have noticed the changes and ask my friend what's going on, she tells me and then when i get a chance we have "the talk", so far it's working great. When telling friends i like to do it face to face. At first i only told those that needed to know, parent's, doctors and a couple friends but after a few months i started expanding now my neighbors and more friends know. I know you want to shout it to the world but take it a bit slower.
Those that are at different levels of acceptance give them time to get their head wrapped around it, you have known for a long time but for them it's new. If you are like most of us you tried being a manly man and they have a hard time seeing you as anything but right now.
Get thee to a gender therapist if you are not yet, they will help you down this usually long and winding road to transition.
HUGGS!
Paula
Hi Helena. I'm so glad you found this forum, it's a great start. The first thing (as already stated) is to find a gender therapist, and make your transition at your own pace. Don't let anyone rush you. We are all individuals, but our experiences are remarkably similiar, so ask anything and everything.