Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: Krissy_Australia on August 04, 2009, 10:36:18 AM

Title: Divorce
Post by: Krissy_Australia on August 04, 2009, 10:36:18 AM
Im so sad
Today my wife Claire and I decided to proceed with divorce. I really didnt think it was going to affect me so much as it has. We have been married 16 years and known each other for 20.
I now things will feel better in a little time but tonite all I want to do is cry.
Just needed to say something.

Krissy
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Syne on August 04, 2009, 01:05:08 PM
I am so sorry to read that.

Hugs!
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Sarah Louise on August 04, 2009, 01:12:24 PM
Divorce is always hard, are their any children?

A good cry is always in order.

Sarah
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Zelane on August 04, 2009, 04:13:16 PM
Its for the best, isnt it?
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Dana_W on August 04, 2009, 05:29:23 PM
Very, very sorry to hear that Krissy. I've been married & together with my spouse roughly the same amount of time and I really sympathize with how traumatic it must feel. I only hope you'll now get to have some more freedom to be who you really are. That doesn't make the hurt go away now though, of course.

Stay strong. You'll pull through this!
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Krissy_Australia on August 05, 2009, 09:22:56 AM
thankou to all of you
support here means so much especially when you are feeling down.
I knew divorce was coming and it was a mutual decision but the reality of these events is quite confronting.

Transition teaches you a lot of things. As you feel better about yourself you have to let the people you love grow them selves without the person they once thought they knew.

Ive read so many times that the cure for transexulism is to transition. There is no truer statement than this. The demons that Im now overcoming are amazing.

Hopefully at the end of the process (when ever that may be) Claire will see the person that she fell in love with.
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Janet_Girl on August 05, 2009, 10:03:38 AM
Big Hugs, Hon

I understand how much this hurts.  But in time you may find that you two can remain very close friends.

I just finished mine this year.  Someday, some where you will find someone who will accept you for you and love you as you are.

It can happen.  I know that this is true, because I found someone.  And she is the center of my world.

Janet
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Nigella on August 05, 2009, 07:26:05 PM
So sorry to hear your news. I too have spilt with my wife of 27 years only 10 months ago and it still hurts and I wish there could have been something I could have done but there wasn't. I still love her with all my heart and soul.

My heart goes out to you, big hug.

Stardust
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: katherine on August 06, 2009, 07:38:54 AM
I'm sorry to hear that Krissy.  I know there are some here who managed to stay together, but for many of us our transition leads to divorce.  I've been married 29 years and my wife and I will divorce as a result of my transition.  It is difficult to leave someone you love and care so much about.  I truly hope the two of you will be able to remain friends.  Either way, you have friends here when you need a hug...
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Genevieve Swann on August 06, 2009, 07:55:16 AM
Sorry to hear about that. Maybe it is a blessing in disguise. I found that I respect and enjoy my wife more now since seperation over 15 years ago. You're headed for greener pastures dear.
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Naturally Blonde on August 06, 2009, 08:33:00 AM
It seems to be the norm in these forums. I personally have never been married to either gender.
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Genevieve Swann on August 06, 2009, 09:49:36 AM
We must all keep in mind that marraige is the number one cause of divorce. Naturally Blonde has it right. The solution to the problem is to not create it in the first place. I have only made the same mistake once.
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Chloe on August 09, 2009, 08:05:04 AM
Quote from: Krissy_Australia on August 05, 2009, 09:22:56 AMTransition teaches you a lot of things. As you feel better about yourself you have to let the people you love grow them selves without the person they once thought they knew.

So true! Cheer up Krissy, separation/divorce is not bad especially when it's friendly, mutually agreed upon. Trick is to keep busy and it's even better when the so-called 'dad' gets to keep the kids (9 and 11)

;D ;D My definition of "love given freely": Sometimes one needs to be willing to completely let go of that which one otherwise totally needs/wants to keep the most!
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Ellieka on August 09, 2009, 09:47:59 AM
Hi hun. I'm so sorry to hear this. Even when you know it's coming it still rips your heart out. I'm going through it too. PM me if you need to talk, k?

(HUGS)
-Cami
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Janet_Girl on August 09, 2009, 10:52:24 AM
I got my finalized paper yesterday.  And it hit home that we are done.  She also moved to another city.  But a very good point is that I am in a new relationship and this frees me up.

Krissy, you're cute based on your avatar.  You will find someone new.  And if you to are still friendly, it doesn't mean your not friends.   It just means that your are no longer married.  Being a free woman will open doors.


Janet
Title: Re: Divorce
Post by: Krissy_Australia on August 10, 2009, 09:33:48 AM
Again Thankyou

Im coming to terms with the issue of divorce.Claire and I have become a lot more stronger in our personalities now. The thing about divorce is it seem so final. We will always be friends which is great as we do have four children together. I know things are going to work out.
Janet, you really know how to make a girl feel great.

Krissy