I'm just a bit paranoid now and again. I worry that I don't look man enough and though my girl says otherwise, I err on the side that she's biased. What do you guys think? I would especially like a note on my face shape. Thanks :)
Here's a good show of face shape.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi804.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fyy325%2Fsebludo%2Fme1-1.jpg&hash=611f85e310d6bb6f09970823a02d2bc252f871ae)
Here's what I usually look like.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi804.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fyy325%2Fsebludo%2Fme2-1.jpg&hash=0300c3ee196924ae789fcdadf9477134965a5cf2)
Here's my chest from a shorts ways and the side.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi804.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fyy325%2Fsebludo%2Fme4-1.jpg&hash=429f270bbd525949e69ef07cf1a3014a33a316e6)
And here's my chest a bit closer.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi804.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fyy325%2Fsebludo%2Fme3-1.jpg&hash=37b28a13b15042747ad952cac219ec25e2439eae)
Thanks for any and all comments.
EDIT: Pictures were not working before. I fixed that.
EDIT 2: NEW HAIRCUT :D
How do I look with the short hair?
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fv671%2FVohlk%2F12281002401.jpg&hash=55e7cf51545ae80e4d8287b8b501626807c4e5d9)
chest is fine, face ...don't smile and you pass, you have a bit of hip-tummy thing that prob gets in the way.
so saying, I'm no better.
Just by looking quickly i would say you pass, but i think your mannerisms and voice would shift my thought since you could go either way if you wanted
I agree with Lordkat, your face looks feminine when you smile (god that's a horrible thing to imply that someone shouldn't smile :-\ but from the pics I would assume female in the smiling one and male in the second one). As for the third, I think cutting your hair would tip you over into the male section.
I disagree, I don't think you look 'feminine' when you smile. You look like you're happy.
This is going to sound obtuse... but your smile looks exactly like the smile of other people with your facial structure :P.
You sort of look like a friend of mine. Biological male too.
Quote from: Nero on December 12, 2009, 10:19:32 PM
I agree with Lordkat, your face looks feminine when you smile (god that's a horrible thing to imply that someone shouldn't smile :-\ but from the pics I would assume female in the smiling one and male in the second one). As for the third, I think cutting your hair would tip you over into the male section.
Hmm, alot of smile comments. Haha. It's funny to think something I can't avoid is something that doesn't help. :D And Nero, would cutting it more really help? I actually had hair length past my shoulders before I cut it to this length. I couldn't exactly go any shorted because of family and my girlfriend. Everyone had an issue with it, though it was really my family that was the problem. I could always go in alone and come back saying, "There was a little mishap. Oh well!"
I'm liking the advice so far. It's good... and bad I gues :P to hear that my fears were in fact true. Though I would hope my mannerisms tip me over enough because I use the mens room and it's a terrifying thought to think I might get read wrong.... Maybe I should stop? More advice guys? Thank you in advance.
hmm well, due to comments that the smile passed, I looked closer. I think the hair is a factor. in the smile pic, it's sorta slicked back or wet, making it look like it's in a more female style. you know how girls often have it pulled back in a ponytail or something. when it's dry and fuller like in the second pic, not so much. the hair is such a tricky thing.
Quote from: No-Name on December 12, 2009, 11:30:08 PM
Hmm, alot of smile comments. Haha. It's funny to think something I can't avoid is something that doesn't help. :D And Nero, would cutting it more really help? I actually had hair length past my shoulders before I cut it to this length. I couldn't exactly go any shorted because of family and my girlfriend. Everyone had an issue with it, though it was really my family that was the problem. I could always go in alone and come back saying, "There was a little mishap. Oh well!"
I'm liking the advice so far. It's good... and bad I gues :P to hear that my fears were in fact true. Though I would hope my mannerisms tip me over enough because I use the mens room and it's a terrifying thought to think I might get read wrong.... Maybe I should stop? More advice guys? Thank you in advance.
I think you pass...though very young. I would clock you around 13 or so.
On a slightly unrelated note, does anyone notice ethnicity playing a part in passing? I generally have a harder time reading someone of African or Hispanic descent than someone Caucasian, but could just be me.
Quote from: No-Name on December 12, 2009, 11:30:08 PM
I could always go in alone and come back saying, "There was a little mishap. Oh well!"
I cut my hair for about 2 years using that line.. as it got shorter and shorter ;D . I have to agree with Markster, to me you read male, but appearances are only half of it. Your mannerisms are going to be what tips the scale either way. If you project that you are male, you'll more than likely be read as male, that's my experience anyways.
You look a lot like a cisgendered male friend of mine from Singapore. (Really! So "a lot" that it's a little creepy/confusing..)
Even in the smiling shot.
So I'd say you pass...
I probably wouldn't look twice - depends on mannerisms though, either way. Could go for either depending on the clothes, too.
I agree with some others on the hair though - a slightly shorter hair style would go better. Depending on your age you can always tell the family to "shove it". YOUR hair, YOUR choice - you know?
I had long hair for most of my life. Two years ago i got it snipped shoulder length - my dad cried. Literally. He loved my long hair, hates it short. Last year i got the back trimmed more though left the bangs long. Finally took the step to get it cut even shorter last week - bangs included. My dad cried - again.
Now he's used to it. My mom likes it. Big family drama over hair, but its done. You can always grow it out again (i think my dad's holding onto that hope...)
Hm, well I'm sure that my clothing and mannerisms pass. My voice is androgynous... I can push it either way and so I'll have to be more careful with that. I'm told on occassion 'what a girl' I sound like :-\
All this advice is great guys ;D I see that shorter hair is really a must, huh? I'm 18, but I can't really tell my parents to "shove it". Hispanic family, bottom of the food chain, not a good idea. But maybe it'll be for the best. I'll have to some up the courage for that one. :P
The fat distribution on your face is feminine, but that's to be expected. Are you on T?
Post Merge: December 13, 2009, 04:33:27 PM
Quote from: No-Name on December 12, 2009, 11:30:08 PMThough I would hope my mannerisms tip me over enough because I use the mens room and it's a terrifying thought to think I might get read wrong.... Maybe I should stop?
If the men haven't noticed and haven't confronted you you're probably safe. Just be cautious if you go somewhere where people might be more aggressive, like a bar.
Quote from: Radar on December 13, 2009, 04:27:37 PM
The fat distribution on your face is feminine, but that's to be expected. Are you on T?
Post Merge: December 13, 2009, 06:33:27 PM
If the men haven't noticed and haven't confronted you you're probably safe. Just be cautious if you go somewhere where people might be more aggressive, like a bar.
No, I'm not on T. And thanks for the advice, I'll keep that in mind. :)
Quote from: Kvall on December 13, 2009, 05:33:58 PM
Some guys pass better with long hair. I think your hair is okay. It's hard to predict what short hair will do since you may end up getting read as a butch lesbian.
And yeah, I get how longer hair can help others be read as male. I don't really like long hair because it gets in the way and I think of it as a female thing. However, when I didn't know I was trans and has my chest out for people to see (mind you I'm not large to begin with) I was sir-ed all the time. Unless I was with a group of girls, because with my girlfriend I even got sir-ed, I was seen as male.
It was terribly embarassing though to have them realize their mistake. Funny how it took me this long to understand why it felt so good to be sir-ed and so bad to ma'am-ed. Haha :D
yeah it's the way you hair is in the first smile pic. Your smiling avatar looks male. the difference is the hair. I actually think the long hair helps you.
I think the longer hair helps too. It doesn't have to be long long, just longer for a guy's cut. Some guys have said that when they got their hair cut really short/buzzed/shaved they passed less.
I have to agree with Nero, the avatar pic passes fine. The longer hair is probably it. I think if you keep it about where its at you should do well.
You look like a guy to me, and I think that the hair works for you.
Not knowing you at all, I would say you pass fine at this point and I wouldn't even question it unless your voice/manner/confidence made me suspicious.
And yeah, don't be a non-smiley happy guy - smile whenever you want. :P
As for the hair, I would keep the bangs you have but if you just wanted to cut the back up toward the hairline a bit, I don't think that would hurt at all.
you pass to me
Keep the hair.
When you cut your hair short, you can still look very feminine and beautiful (Rihanna)...You pass better with long hair. Please keep it!
Also you pass on everything! But like other people say...If I saw you, your mannerisms and your voice would be the key factor of "picking your gender".
So I've finally cut my hair! Check out the OP for the pic, or just check it out on the side.
How does it look? Do I still pass? ;D
the short hair looks great
If I saw you walking around I don't see anything that would make me think female. Unless you walk like a girl or something, but I doubt you do.
It ain't about the hair, though a short bad haircut screams guy - or at least - congressman. It's about a hundred, if not a thousand little things. How you walk, how you move. How you cross your legs, how you pick things up. How you pour a beer into a glass, and knowing enough that it ain't the kind of bar where anyone but a woman would pour a beer into a glass. It's never anything huge that gives you away, it's all about the little things.
i think you pass better
Thanks you guys! ;D
Oh, and Tekla, I know what you mean. I've got at least half of the little things down. I passed way before I even knew what trans was. Masculine has really just been me. There are however a few things I have yet to learn, especially with the whole bar thing. I'm 18 and I've only had drinks with friends when I was 16 in an abandoned house. So, that whole ordeal with definitely be something to work on and many other tiny details that men are accustomed to. Thank you, however, for pointing it out. :)
Quote from: tekla on December 30, 2009, 08:27:21 PM
How you pour a beer into a glass, and knowing enough that it ain't the kind of bar where anyone but a woman would pour a beer into a glass.
It's funny you mention this. When you first said something about "how you pour a beer into a glass" I was thinking "who pours it into a glass??" lol
Your hair looks good. That's a good cut for you.
Yeah but your glasses are quite female...
Jay
Quote from: NES_junkie_James on December 31, 2009, 01:37:37 PM
It's funny you mention this. When you first said something about "how you pour a beer into a glass" I was thinking "who pours it into a glass??" lol
True. But I've finally conceded to pouring one beer into a glass: the bottled Guinness that has a little liquid nitrogen 'rocket' in it to create a nice, foamy head upon pouring.
OP: hair looks pretty good, though I'm gonna second what's been said about mannerisms, etc. It looks like you have a shadow under your lips, which is what reads 'male' to me the most. Granted, it's 14-year-old male with a boystach, but I don't look much older so *shrug*
Quote from: Eryk on January 01, 2010, 01:32:19 PM
True. But I've finally conceded to pouring one beer into a glass: the bottled Guinness that has a little liquid nitrogen 'rocket' in it to create a nice, foamy head upon pouring.
Actually, I guess that's true, I pour my Kilkenny or Hoegaarten into a glass at home (Kilkenny cuz of the Nitro widget, Hoegaarten cuz it's an unfiltered wheat beer, so it needs to be poured right to maintain the intended cloudiness). But at a bar I usually order draft or drink out of the bottle.
Are my glasses really feminine? :o
... Well, actually, I take that back. They are feminine. I remember when I had to get these new frames and when I first got them I was all, "These look so girly!" Uhg, I had forgotten that they look that way since I've had them for a time. Maybe I can get some new frames... Manly frames. ;D
Ray-Ban has lots of cool frames for prescription glasses, that are stylish, yet look designed for prescriptions, not sunglasses. Of course then you can get the Wayfarers for your sunglasses and you'll be set.
I think new glasses will help in the long run, I myself am buying new ones this month and hope to find a more masculine frame.... it seems to be an issue for those of us with glasses. My fiancee is MTF and she has the same issue, we are also buying her new glasses this month haha.
I agree with what has been said so far about the first picture, it wasn't the smile, it was the hair. I was actually surprised to see how short your hair was before you cut it in the second picture, the first one did seem like it was just pulled back in a ponytail and that made it seem more female to me. And I do like the new hair cut, I think it went well and didn't get so short that you have that butch lesbian look.
One thing I did before I began T (since I too look like a younger guy) was to use men's facial hair dye to make my fuzz look more like a young man's fuzz when they first start growing their facial hair. It will still be fine and soft (so it will add to the young appearance sadly) but it will also create less doubt at the same time. Especially if you shave the parts of your face that you don't dye.
I personally don't see the hip problem that was mentioned by someone earlier, but the pictures don't really show enough. If you feel this is an issue for you experiment with different cuts of pants and shirts in the dressing room next time you go shopping. I've found for me it works best to wear pants lower on my hips (just above the crotch hair line) and then to wear a shirt that reaches just past the top of my pants. It helps me look like I have less curves, you may find a way to wear clothing that does the same for you, but we have very different body types so I don't have any specific suggestions for you. I personally am very thin so I had a big problem with the hip area, since it is pretty much the only place on my body that appears very female. There are also different kinds of control top under garments for men including long under shirts or even bike style shorts that some of my bigger friends swear by to help shape their body into a masculine look. If you are interested I can ask them what they use or if there is a good site online that sells the items for you to look at. Just let me know :)
I think you pass better with your new haircut.
It's much better! :)
The new cut looks good, better.
It's great to know that my new cut looks great and that some new frames will be a benefit. But what is sad is that I live at home and the hair grows out or I'm kicked out. So yeah. I'm very sad about that, especially since my hair has always grown like a weed.
Quote from: No-Name on January 03, 2010, 11:06:52 PM
But what is sad is that I live at home and the hair grows out or I'm kicked out. So yeah.
What a pain in the a**. Good luck with your parents.
I know! Uhg, I'm just going to have to move out. I'm job hunting because I'm jobless and I've already got a friend or two who can pitch in for a place. California isn't very fun, however, when it comes to finding a job. But, I shall prevail! ;D Transition is very important to me at this point.