...any last minute advice before I email it?
It's basically me telling them that I want to be a girl, what that means to me specifically (since we all have our own individual take on that), as well as the fact that I'm seeing a gender therapist about it. I've decided to skip the part where I plead like a puppy for them to maybe help me with electro/hrt/surgery until after I find out how they react to just the idea of it :P. I would post it here but it's relatively long and has some personal stuff between me and my parents in it. Oh, and I also included a link to the PL->-bleeped-<- trans support site for them to look at, assuming they don't burn the email immediately (figuratively speaking).
So yeah, I'm mostly terrified about doing this but I can't really put it off any longer (especially since I've already told them I'll be sending them an email soon about something big).
What do you think the reaction will be? And if it isn't positive can you live with that?
Hate to be the devil's advocate but it can happen. Are you ready for that? If it is "Yes", rock on Girl. Rock ON.
Janet
I'm pretty sure they will be supportive -- eventually. I've told them what *I* would consider worse things, but people don't always act rationally around this subject. And I'm already mostly on my own financially (they pay for health insurance), so it's not like I will be in dire financial straits if they have a bad reaction... So I guess I'm going to send it. Only question is tonight or tomorrow...
Send it tonight and get a good nights sleep. Once it is sent then it will be beyond your control.
Oh wait. You might not sleep. Never mind.
But best of luck, Ketsy. It is always a hate thing to do, come out to the parents.
Janet
I don't know what I should say. I can say that you alone are responsible for your decision, your life and your future.
Anyway, in my case, what they saw was more effective than what I said. To see is to believe. Of course, I had to talk and talk with patience.
It will take more time and effort.
Barbie~~
Well, I just clicked the send button... what have I gotten myself into now? ??? Fingers crossed...
I hope all goes well for you, Hon. And that you are pleasantly surprised by the return e-mail or phone call. :o
Janet
Hope for the best, hon.
Just remember that they will not lose a child. But perhaps see the child they always should have had.
Let us know how it goes.
-Sandy
crosses fingers
It's been about four days and no reply... I'm not sure when/if I should expect a reply though.
Maybe a phone call is called for on your part. Just as a followup. Kinda "Hi How you are doing?" sort of thing.
Just saying,
Janet
I think I'll give it a few more days... I'm in the process of moving to a new place anyway, got enough to deal with.
Best of luck Ketsy.
You know they have it. If they aren't responding, they may simply be trying to regain the upper hand.
If you phone them now, will you be letting them have it?
As it's been a few days, can you perhaps write another email?
Shorter this time. Tell them this is what you are going to do. As them for their opinions.
That way, you still have your cards, so to speak, but you leave them an opening to come back.
Well, they wrote back...
It's not the end of the world. But it's not super fantastic either. Basically, back when I was in high school there were some issues that came up between us and we went through a lot of family therapy type stuff dealing with it. My impression now is that after reading my email they think it's some crazy thing from me to try to 'erase' what happened before. And from there they went on about how I need to finish college and get a job and they want written proof before they pay more tuition or some nonsense. I guess they forgot that they already agreed not to pay any more tuition at my request! Gah! As for what happened back in high school, I spent a long time and a lot of therapy getting to the point where I could move beyond that, but I guess they're still a little hung up on it. Anyway I'm going to write them back to try to clarify some thing a little and see how it goes from there.
Well at least you heard back from them. And while it may not be the greatest news, it has opened the lines of communications.
Janet
Yeah, I just spent a long time writing a really long reply. I'm kind of doubtful they will *really* take in what I said, but it was more saying it for me. I'll be okay either way. I'll probably call my therapist tomorrow, if I can find some time to be on the phone when other people aren't around -- not totally out of the closet yet :(.