Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transitioning => Coming out of the closet => Topic started by: El on January 07, 2010, 04:24:19 PM

Title: The scary front door
Post by: El on January 07, 2010, 04:24:19 PM
Ok so mum and dad know, my friends knows, im pretty "out" and i spend 99% of the time at home "dressed" now but the step out of my front door terrifies me, i know i need to sort out my hair and make-up before i venture out but still even after that its still a damn scary proposition.

How did you who are 24/7 get the courage to expose your condition tot he general public? im looking for a little inspiration!
Title: Re: The scary front door
Post by: june bug on January 07, 2010, 04:37:02 PM
Quote from: El on January 07, 2010, 04:24:19 PMHow did you who are 24/7 get the courage to expose your condition tot he general public? im looking for a little inspiration!

A step at a time.

I started out places I felt most comfortable (local coffee shops, clubs) and went from there.

It's also nice to have friends who support you and go out with them the first few times.

Also, you don't have to necessarily put on your prettiest dress the first time... I started out with just a tank top that revealed my figure and some make up.  Just a thought.

Congratulations and good luck!  Much love!  :icon_boogy:
Title: Re: The scary front door
Post by: El on January 07, 2010, 04:50:37 PM
:) sounds like sound advice, im kind of worried about running into someone from work before i come out there

also everyone in norfolk knows everyone else so as soon as i do it, it is very much finalised
Title: Re: The scary front door
Post by: Janet_Girl on January 07, 2010, 05:46:20 PM
If you run into anyone you know deal with it then, not before.

Go for a short walk, check the mail.  Anything then go one step further.

And if you are out and about in drab, think how many people to you see that know you.  If many shop where you shop, change when and where.

And when you go for the big one, I agree, take a friend if possible.  I did that when I first started, but now I go where I want, when I want.  Most who know me now know anyway.
Title: Re: The scary front door
Post by: CharleneT on January 15, 2010, 05:06:49 PM
You might try going to a nearby town and walking around there.  Do some things, go to a store etc...  It will help get used to walking around and having people looking at you.  Just remember, they don't really know anything and there could be many reasons why their glance falls your way.  At first it can seem like everyone is staring and knows everything, almost all of that is in your head though.  Just the normal butterflies . . .

Most important:  try and relax.  No kidding, it will help more than great makeup or a killer outfit.