I just wonder why
It's a support site. It makes people feel better to get these things out.
Quote from: SilverFang on January 10, 2010, 08:31:10 PM
It's a support site. It makes people feel better to get these things out.
Word. :P
I'm pretty sure that the answers people give is almost always relevent to the persons topic, regardless of whether or not the story has been posted previously. Sometimes it's good to tell your own story as it shows that we share universal experiences.
And many time the new ones need to know that we have all done there, done that.
To show that they are not alone.
Janet
Quote from: Greg on January 10, 2010, 08:44:36 PM
I'm pretty sure that the answers people give is almost always relevent to the persons topic, regardless of whether or not the story has been posted previously. Sometimes it's good to tell your own story as it shows that we share universal experiences.
This too. I find it's a way of grounding the experience and helping relate to other people. Give an example of situations I've personally been through in the hopes that it might help them with their own.
People like to talk about themselves, just in general. I don't think that is just a transgendered phenomenon.
If it does seem to be more prevalent here, it may be because dealing with these types of issues is an introspective process and people tend to be pretty focused on themselves while they figure things out. Also, the related experiences of others is more welcome here than other places because it can be really helpful to hear how people have coped and which processes worked, etc.
Also, we're all major narcissists =P.
I am a major narcissist and I love to talk about myself. In fact, I can see Russia from my house
Quote from: xsocialworker on January 10, 2010, 08:54:06 PM
I am a major narcissist and I love to talk about myself. In fact, I can see Russia from my house
:laugh:
Quote from: SilverFang on January 10, 2010, 08:31:10 PM
It's a support site. It makes people feel better to get these things out.
Yepper Pepper.
Quote from: SilverFang on January 10, 2010, 08:31:10 PM
It's a support site. It makes people feel better to get these things out.
Another vote here
But in regards to narcissism, I've notice that since I started HRT my panties seem a bit tighter and I'm worried that my butt might look big in these jeans and I keep looking to see if I can see Russia from my house and if my boobs are big enough yet and if I can consider my body to be mine or if it is a body that I took over and I painted my toenails and I'm sure they are prettier than everyone else' and (pant pant, catches breath) and........
i could give examples but it wouldn't be fair to the posters so just trust me..you all know what i mean... i'm not talking about someone posting looking for support..i'm talking about repliers who reply to answer a post and then either conciously or unconciously start to talk about their own problems, issues, etc... they very commonly move into their life story in what seems to be a self-affirming need to state how and why they are...and almost always, especially with the more transitioned or arrived iMtFs an underlying inference of i'm more real or female, attached to this...now i'm am not looking to attack, be mean or make anyone uncomfortable...i just wonder why and want to understand the drivers.....why do some need to do this...what is it about...
Quote from: Virginia Marie on January 10, 2010, 09:45:43 PMBut in regards to narcissism, I've notice that since I started HRT my panties seem a bit tighter and I'm worried that my butt might look big in these jeans and I keep looking to see if I can see Russia from my house and if my boobs are big enough yet and if I can consider my body to be mine or if it is a body that I took over and I painted my toenails and I'm sure they are prettier than everyone else' and (pant pant, catches breath) and........
You too?
Probably because a lot of the opening posters questions or comments reminds us of where we were and where we are now. It sparks our emotions.
Quote from: lauren3332 on January 10, 2010, 10:30:05 PM
Probably because a lot of the opening posters questions or comments reminds us of where we were and where we are now. It sparks our emotions.
That sums it up very well.
Quote from: legion on January 10, 2010, 10:07:02 PM
i could give examples but it wouldn't be fair to the posters so just trust me..you all know what i mean... i'm not talking about someone posting looking for support..i'm talking about repliers who reply to answer a post and then either conciously or unconciously start to talk about their own problems, issues, etc... they very commonly move into their life story in what seems to be a self-affirming need to state how and why they are...and almost always, especially with the more transitioned or arrived iMtFs an underlying inference of i'm more real or female, attached to this...now i'm am not looking to attack, be mean or make anyone uncomfortable...i just wonder why and want to understand the drivers.....why do some need to do this...what is it about...
Looking through some of your previous posts, it seems that you also have related experiences of your past when responding to a thread.
I, for one, will knowingly respond with my own experiences if someone is looking for an opinion or seeking answers. Depending on the nature of the response, I may relate a synopsis of my experience, or point them to an entry in my blog, "Sandy's Transition".
I do not do it for any need of affirmation. I already know who I am. But there are others who are questioning their journey or are seeking to find out if they are in fact horrible people. When others relate that they also have had the same feelings that these seekers do, it can provide comfort.
When I first started on my journey, I sought out the experiences of others to help answer my questions about myself. I am now paying it forward.
-Sandy
Okay, I was kidding around a bit. But I somewhat understand what you mean
But most folks don't have much else to go on but their own personal experiences and there's nothing wrong with that
But sometimes I wonder if they are replying to a thread or writing an autobiography or some other literary composition
What ever the case, folks are just expressing themselves in the best way they can
I tend to use minimal posts and my somewhat odd humor. Other times I'm very serious
I want to be the perfect woman!!!!!!!!!!! I want Michelle Bachmann's hair, Gretchen Carlson's legs, and Glenn Beck's tear ducts. And Lindsay Graham's name
Quote from: legion on January 10, 2010, 08:23:38 PM
I just wonder why nearly everyone who posts here has a need to continually tell, and re-tell their life stories.....i notice how often it takes over a post they are answering on one subject and then ends up being focused soley on the answerer's story about themselves... every one does it from new born to deep stealth... the main group affected however, seems to be MtF and have been transitioned for a few years and upwards... i wonder why that is.....
Quote from: legion on January 10, 2010, 10:07:02 PM
i could give examples but it wouldn't be fair to the posters so just trust me..you all know what i mean... i'm not talking about someone posting looking for support..i'm talking about repliers who reply to answer a post and then either conciously or unconciously start to talk about their own problems, issues, etc... they very commonly move into their life story in what seems to be a self-affirming need to state how and why they are...and almost always, especially with the more transitioned or arrived iMtFs an underlying inference of i'm more real or female, attached to this...now i'm am not looking to attack, be mean or make anyone uncomfortable...i just wonder why and want to understand the drivers.....why do some need to do this...what is it about...
Why? for the same reason that we respond to silly, trollish posts.
Hey hang on... are you calling me a troll ????
...but putting "thems fighting words" aside for a moment i noticed what i asked touched a few nerves..why would that be...
I suspect it has more to do with the fact that when we post we want someone new, who may niether have the time or inclination to go back reading through a lot of historical posts, to know where we are coming from.
I like my answers to be correctly understood in context, not missunderstood becuase the reader, whom I've often not seen before, doesn't know who I am, what I've done in life, and where I'm coming from.
And now here (in the italics) is a very tiny but entirely relevant example:
One feature which I miss on Susans, which exists on two other non trans forums which I moderate, is the ability to write a biographical paragraph or more in my profile. If we had that then I for one would not feel the need to do this.
actually we are no different from all the sex researchers who post the same old incorrect crap about us ad nauseum. I've just spent a lot of the weekend researching some transsexual topics and it is amazing how some of the researchers and writers repeat the same stuff. so perhaps its just that transsexual is so fascinating to live through and observe.
Quote from: SilverFang on January 10, 2010, 08:31:10 PM
It's a support site. It makes people feel better to get these things out.
Got it in one. Past experiance helps..
Jay
there is a good example under "transgender talk" within "how much time do you spend" right now.... i wont name the poster it is easy to see anyway...now why? what is that about?
Quote from: legion on January 11, 2010, 03:22:54 AM
there is a good example under "transgender talk" within "how much time do you spend" right now.... i wont name the poster it is easy to see anyway...now why? what is that about?
I think the real question you need to meditate on is why you are so fixated on such behavior in others.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi50.tinypic.com%2F2h3sv8z_th.gif&hash=6ba2023c7852f9202e4e8dcda2130381af91a31e)
Quote from: legion on January 11, 2010, 03:22:54 AM
there is a good example under "transgender talk" within "how much time do you spend" right now.... i wont name the poster it is easy to see anyway...now why? what is that about?
Some questions can't really be answered. . . You just come to your own conclusion. Sort of like me and my "Why do women go to the bathroom in packs?" question that nobody can answer. It's either so common and obvious that it need not be explained, or nobody has figured out how to put it into words yet. Or nobody wants to. Anyway, you're probably not going to get a satisfactory answer from us.
It's not a poor me thing for most. When someone makes a comment, others may see a common thread within themselves and feel the need to express how they feel or have felt along with responding to the poster. Also it helps to clarify our views on whatever the topic may be. If people just answered the original poster's question without explaining why we have such a view, why bother commenting in the first place? How can the original poster be helped if he or she does know about those who came be them?
Quote from: legion on January 10, 2010, 08:23:38 PM
I just wonder why nearly everyone who posts here has a need to continually tell, and re-tell their life stories.....i notice how often it takes over a post they are answering on one subject and then ends up being focused soley on the answerer's story about themselves... every one does it from new born to deep stealth... the main group affected however, seems to be MtF and have been transitioned for a few years and upwards... i wonder why that is.....
I find that kind of thing very boring!
"I am more real and more female than-------"
1) Ann (adams apple ) Coulter
2) Laura Ingraham
3) Carrie Prejan ( probably not)
4) Carson Daly
5) Tom Cruise
6) Tony Perkins ( the late actor or the still living right-wing fanatic)
7) Rep. Eric Cantor snuggling up to Rep. Boehner in Congress
8) All of the above
9) None of the above