Monogamy: Gender vs. Sexual Orientation
http://www.bilerico.com/2010/02/monogamy_is_it_about_orientation_or_gender.php (http://www.bilerico.com/2010/02/monogamy_is_it_about_orientation_or_gender.php)
Michele O'Mara
2/4/10
I also wonder, does the open option work better for men than for women? Is this really an issue that is rooted in sexual orientation, or one rooted in gender? Traditionally men are thought to be better at separating sex from emotion, which is helpful in an open arrangement. As Spears and Lowen point out on their website:
We found many couples had a somewhat compartmentalized perspective and approach to outside sex. "It's just sex" - a release without meaning, quite separate from the relationship.
The statistics on fidelity among men and women suggests that monogamy is a struggle for heterosexuals too. According to Peggy Vaughan, author of The Monogamy Myth, "Conservative estimates are that 60 percent of men and 40 percent of women will have an extramarital affair." That's a whole lot of cheating. To clarify, infidelity is deceptive non-monogamy, but an open relationship is non-monogamy that occurs with the consent and knowledge of both partners.