Hey guys, I'm new to these forums, but not new to the idea of transsexuality. I'm not a transsexual myself, but I found someone on youtube who is, a few years ago, and since then I've just been really interested in them. I think transsexuals are lucky, they get to experience life as both genders. Ok correction - they get to be TREATED by others as though they are one gender at point in their lives, and then the opposite at another point.
I'm a woman. For a little while now, i've been thinking about changing genders.. before you jump on me and say I'm crazy or whatever, consider my circumstances. The part of the world in which I've grown up in and currently reside in, is very male dominant. All my life I've been overlooked, I've been passed over for job interviews purely because of my gender; I've had my contributions to conversations waved aside because people around here care more about what's between your legs than the words that come out of your mouth. And I believe to a lesser extent men all over the world have a decided advantage over women. They are taken more seriously, they don't have to constantly worry about how pretty they look, there are no needless mind games between men (or at least not as many as there are between women. I can't tell you how many bitchy women I've known who will treat you absolutely charmingly to your face, and then like you're lower than a worm, behind your back.) Women are crueler in so many ways. Men might not be as naturally empathetic as some females are, but they are direct; I can appreciate that directness and I would love to be a part of that world. I want my career to mean something (I'm in chemical research), I want people to treat me with respect and dignity, and not be dismissed as vacuous or irrelevant simply because of my gender. I realize many women don't share my experiences and thus would come to a completely different conclusion to the one I am proposing, but for me personally, it seems like a viable option.
And who I am inside isn't necessarily going to change; all I want to change is the outside. Is that so strange? People try to control and adapt to their environments no matter who they are; transsexuals by conforming to their gender identity, people like ME by conforming to an external standard. I'm not sure about it, though, which is why I'm posting here now. I would love to hear your thoughts. Do you think this is a good idea? How could I get started?
This is probably the worst thing you could be thinking of doing if you are not trans.
The world ->-bleeped-<-s on us. We loose our families, our jobs our standing in society and the respect of our peers.
We do not do this on a whim, we do it for a serious medical reason. Gender Dysphoria. If you do not suffer from GD then I highly sugest you re-evaluate.
I wish you the best and good luck.
I think it would be a good idea for you to spend some time reading the writings of MTF women - see through their eyes what it's like to be a woman inside, but living in a male body and being treated as a man. To put it as concisely as possible, it's intolerable for them.
Reading what you've written though, if you hadn't explicitly said you weren't trans, if you'd instead said you were questioning whether you might be...well, from my perspective, I wouldn't have ruled it out. There was a time in my life when I was trying really hard to pretend to myself and everyone else that I was a woman, and I felt a lot like you say you do and said some very similar things at that time.
Quote from: cynthialee on March 19, 2010, 02:43:13 PM
We do not do this on a whim, we do it for a serious medical reason. Gender Dysphoria. If you do not suffer from GD then I highly suggest you re-evaluate.
+1
If you can safely avoid transition, go for it, otherwise be prepared for
consequences.
Also, there is no such thing as gender change, but aligning the body to make peace. (assuming there is no delusional thinking)
The standards of care for TS in America specifically state that the motivation for transition must not be in any way desired because of a perceived improvement in social standing. Wanting to transition so you are taken seriously in business would be one of those reasons.
And the nature of hormone therapy on the brain means you will be a different person after transition.
Spend the money on moving to country with better equality if you aren't a transsexual.
Quote from: kyril on March 19, 2010, 02:44:31 PM
I think it would be a good idea for you to spend some time reading the writings of MTF women - see through their eyes what it's like to be a woman inside, but living in a male body and being treated as a man. To put it as concisely as possible, it's intolerable for them.
Reading what you've written though, if you hadn't explicitly said you weren't trans, if you'd instead said you were questioning whether you might be...well, from my perspective, I wouldn't have ruled it out. There was a time in my life when I was trying really hard to pretend to myself and everyone else that I was a woman, and I felt a lot like you say you do and said some very similar things at that time.
Wow really? That's very interesting. No I've always been a woman, I think I can relate to transsexuals though because I get insecure about myself just like they do, perhaps this is a consequence of our natural repressive society, and not specifically to do with gender? Anyway, thankyou for the advice. I will certainly read up on MTF blogs, and hopefully they'll give me some perspective on the issue.
Transitioning also isn't meant about making your life easier just for practical purposes such as getting a better job, etc. You have to really want to be a part of that gender and not just want the benefits.
I would suggest you speak with a gender specialist in your area to help you sort out what you are feeling.
Flexible, I've met "real" women, cisgender women, who envy certain aspects of men's lives but would never undertake any kind of physical transformation. I've never met a cisgender woman who would or did. I have heard that there are a few people out there who claim to take testosterone and/or get top surgery as some sort of political or social statement, but I feel that these people would not be able to do that if they didn't feel some sort of gender variance. I could be wrong, but I would call these people transgender just on the basis of that physical transformation. I don't know what they call themselves.
If you did start T and/or have top surgery so you could live as a man, I would see you as a transsexual of sorts because one definition of that word is someone who wants to live in the sex opposite to the one they were assigned at birth. There are a few definitions of "transsexual." That's part of the problem; someone I would think of as transsexual doesn't necessarily see himself that way. It's up to you to define yourself for yourself.
From my perspective, you are somewhere in the transgender world. Have you done any research on transgender issues? Perhaps you can just be a full-time drag king! :P
Since you are definitely "questioning," you might want to find a good gender therapist to help you to sort all of this out. But be warned; if there isn't any kind of informed consent system in your neck of the woods, you will need recommendations from a therapist (possibly two; I'm not sure how it works in some venues) in order to get the physical changes that you think you want, especially if you want surgery. If the therapist says no, then you will have to decide what to do. It really depends on where you live. And a person who sees "herself" as a woman who wants to transition and live as a man might well be classified as mentally ill. I don't know.
I don't recommend that you start any physical changes without the benefit of therapy. Being transsexual and going through transition is a tough road, even for FTMs. I know that this is not absolutely true for absolutely everyone, but I've seen few exceptions. For actual transsexuals, the regret rate is low, but for someone who says she isn't a transsexual...I don't know.
Think about how you see your future life. What physical changes do you expect to make? Will you still see yourself as a woman even when you're living as a man? Will you want to stay legally female? If you feel like a woman and identify as a woman, what will it be like to have that go unrecognized by others? Will your transition make you the target of work discrimination? And what about family and friends and romantic relationships?
I should also point out that for a lot of us, the promise that we'll "still be the same person inside" is a lot of hooey. Take me, for example. In many ways, I've stayed the same. In many ways I've changed. Freeing myself up has changed me and is still changing me. Being seen differently by the world is changing me. The stresses of transition are changing me. Testosterone has definitely changed me in some ways. It's different for everybody.
Therapy should help you to figure out what you want. You might find that you haven't been entirely honest with yourself. A lot of us who do identify ourselves as transsexuals find that out about ourselves. Many of us compartmentalize our lives and have elaborate coping systems. I've been in therapy for over a year and a half, and I've been in transition for just over a year--and I'm still peeling back layers of self-deception. But then I guess my self-deception ran pretty deep. That might not be true of you.
Good luck. I hope you get some useful feedback here.
Quote from: Autumn on March 19, 2010, 02:50:32 PM
The standards of care for TS in America specifically state that the motivation for transition must not be in any way desired because of a perceived improvement in social standing. Wanting to transition so you are taken seriously in business would be one of those reasons.
And the nature of hormone therapy on the brain means you will be a different person after transition.
Spend the money on moving to country with better equality if you aren't a transsexual.
Can you elaborate on how hormone therapy affects the brain?
Also, I'm not in America (not even close), so I doubt the motivations for me "transitioning" would pose a problem.
Quote from: flexible on March 19, 2010, 03:04:37 PM
Can you elaborate on how hormone therapy affects the brain?
Also, I'm not in America (not even close), so I doubt the motivations for me "transitioning" would pose a problem.
You need to do research on what standards your country adheres to.
Hormone therapy changes people differently. I suggest that you acquire some trans biographies and read what some of those guys say about how they have changed or how they think they've changed. Do some reading online. There are a lot of resources out there. But definitely get some of the "standard" books. Jamison Green, Matt Kailey, Max Wolf Valerio. Guys like them.
I have to say that although I'm trying to keep an open mind here, I have strong reservations about some of your perceptions. For example, you feel that transsexuals are lucky because they get to experience life from both "sides"--living as male and living as female. It's true that many trans people consider this a gift and a unique experience. I don't. It was torture living as a woman because I was not a woman. I turned myself off. I shut down. I got stuck. I turned into a person whose main goal was survival, and that made me selfish to a degree that I'm just beginning to appreciate. I hurt my partner in unfathomable ways. I lied to myself and therefore to him. I hate myself for it. And my career...well, the term "late bloomer" doesn't even begin to cover it, and I've had to decline all sorts of career-enhancing opportunities because I was always barely managing to stay alive.
All those wasted years...no, I do not consider transsexuality a gift. For me it is a curse. It's what I have to work with, but I do NOT consider myself fortunate because I lived as a woman.
I have a strong sense of self. Nothing scares me more than those body snatcher movies in which people stop being themselves, or the
Twilight Zone episode in which the girl Marilyn gets a beautiful new body but loses her self in the process and goes from a smart, angsty, and inquiring person to a happy, brainless bimbo. But if I could erase it all, start over and just be a boy. I would do it. I would.
Quote from: Arch on March 19, 2010, 03:04:03 PM
Flexible, I've met "real" women, cisgender women, who envy certain aspects of men's lives but would never undertake any kind of physical transformation. I've never met a cisgender woman who would or did. I have heard that there are a few people out there who claim to take testosterone and/or get top surgery as some sort of political or social statement, but I feel that these people would not be able to do that if they didn't feel some sort of gender variance. I could be wrong, but I would call these people transgender just on the basis of that physical transformation. I don't know what they call themselves.
If you did start T and/or have top surgery so you could live as a man, I would see you as a transsexual of sorts because one definition of that word is someone who wants to live in the sex opposite to the one they were assigned at birth. There are a few definitions of "transsexual." That's part of the problem; someone I would think of as transsexual doesn't necessarily see himself that way. It's up to you to define yourself for yourself.
From my perspective, you are somewhere in the transgender world. Have you done any research on transgender issues? Perhaps you can just be a full-time drag king! :P
I've never considered that I might be transsexual! Maybe it's true. I don't know honestly if I would ever actually transition, it's an idea at this point, one escape from the gender biases I face each and everyday. But you're right, "cis" gendered women don't generally consider such things. How would you know for sure? Is there some concrete test? I've never actually, for lack of better word, "felt" like a man, I've always been a girl inside my head, and all the parts fit, so there should be no confusion.
QuoteSince you are definitely "questioning," you might want to find a good gender therapist to help you to sort all of this out. But be warned; if there isn't any kind of informed consent system in your neck of the woods, you will need recommendations from a therapist (possibly two; I'm not sure how it works in some venues) in order to get the physical changes that you think you want, especially if you want surgery. If the therapist says no, then you will have to decide what to do. It really depends on where you live. And a person who sees "herself" as a woman who wants to transition and live as a man might well be classified as mentally ill. I don't know.
I'm not mentally ill, simply curious about alternative possibilities. A gender therapist I fear will label me with some disease, though, so I'm not very inclined to go that route. But I suppose it is a wise suggestion, and I will seriously consider it. Those who have actually been in gender therapy, what actually happens during sessions?
QuoteI don't recommend that you start any physical changes without the benefit of therapy. Being transsexual and going through transition is a tough road, even for FTMs. I know that this is not absolutely true for absolutely everyone, but I've seen few exceptions. For actual transsexuals, the regret rate is low, but for someone who says she isn't a transsexual...I don't know.
Think about how you see your future life. What physical changes do you expect to make?
I want to look like a man. Pass as a man. Be treated with the respect and dignity that men of any class and creed gets treated. I don't want to experience the inequality involved with being female all my life; I want something to change.
QuoteWill you still see yourself as a woman even when you're living as a man?
I guess so..? Not sure if gender identity is actually something you can change. But I don't think it matters very much.
QuoteWill you want to stay legally female?
No.
QuoteIf you feel like a woman and identify as a woman, what will it be like to have that go unrecognized by others?
I think it'll be an improvement upon my current conditions. Whatever I identify as doesn't matter; how I'll be treated will be better. As for what it'll be like for others not treating me as a girl, I think it'll be great. Liberating.
QuoteWill your transition make you the target of work discrimination?
It's a definite possibility, however, I already am discriminated at work as a female, so it can't be much worse.
QuoteAnd what about family and friends and romantic relationships?
I'm not currently involved with anyone, and my family is very kind and open minded, they pretty much don't mind what I do as long as I believe it to be correct. Friends.. well, you can always make new friends, right?
QuoteI should also point out that for a lot of us, the promise that we'll "still be the same person inside" is a lot of hooey. Take me, for example. In many ways, I've stayed the same. In many ways I've changed. Freeing myself up has changed me and is still changing me. Being seen differently by the world is changing me. The stresses of transition are changing me. Testosterone has definitely changed me in some ways. It's different for everybody.
Therapy should help you to figure out what you want. You might find that you haven't been entirely honest with yourself. A lot of us who do identify ourselves as transsexuals find that out about ourselves. Many of us compartmentalize our lives and have elaborate coping systems. I've been in therapy for over a year and a half, and I've been in transition for just over a year--and I'm still peeling back layers of self-deception. But then I guess my self-deception ran pretty deep. That might not be true of you.
Good luck. I hope you get some useful feedback here.
Thanks for your response :) I appreciate the honest insight.
Flexible,
May I ask what country you're in? From the sounds of things, you may be better off changing countries than genders.
Your desires are pretty common for oppressed women. Women all throughout history have dressed as men, worked as men, loved as men, etc just to avoid sexism and discrimination. Sexism is very real but I don't believe transitioning to male is the answer. Being a woman in this world is tough. But so is living as a gender you don't belong to.
Please don't feel this is a way out. You have other options.
As someone who lived most of her life in the wrong gender, I can tell you it is very awkward. I never passed 100% as a man despite having the anatomy. It was always a struggle. Perhaps you will be more successful than I was, but for me living in the wrong gender was awkward at best and sometimes downright miserable.
You do not have to accept your plight as a woman in a male-dominant society, but I think changing genders - while correcting some of your problems - will create so many more for you that I think you will not be happy.
Just my 2 halala. ;)
- Kate
What the hell? Go for it. You wouldn't be the first.
Literature and history are replete with stories of women living as men, from classical Greece to Disney cartoons. Half of Shakespeare's plays seem to involve the idea. Mythologies from cultures around the world contain plenty of such stories. Hillary Swank lived as a man as preparation for her role in "Boys Don't Cry." Daniela Sea lived as a man for a while. Norah Vincent wrote about living as a man for a year in her book, "Self-Made Man."
It can be dangerous, make no mistake. But as long as you're aware and stay safe and don't do anything permanent, the worst that can happen (PROVIDED you are safe, and don't get beaten to death or worse), is that you find it doesn't work for you. Actually -- scratch that: The real the worst that can happen is that you find it does work for you. But you might as well find out.
QuoteThose who have actually been in gender therapy, what actually happens during sessions?
I sit, I talk, my wallet gets lighter.
Quote from: arbon on March 19, 2010, 11:22:04 PM
Quote from: flexible on March 19, 2010, 03:40:08 PM
Those who have actually been in gender therapy, what actually happens during sessions?
I sit, I talk, my wallet gets lighter.
... and the junk in my head gets straightened out and starts making sense. :)
- Kate
Post removed.
I should have said these things and I am most sorry to any who have read them.
I don't think it's crazy or silly to want to be treated as an equal in the world. I suppose, not knowing how painful and debilitating living as one gender when you are really another inside, that the idea might be intriguing to make the switch. Suffice it to say, while going that route while being ignorant or indifferent to the whole set of consequences might seem a bit insane to those of us who have experienced them, it certainly isn't stupid to question things and wonder about it.
A book by Norah Vincent, Self-Made Man: One Woman's Journey into Manhood and Back might be a good read for you. She describes an experiment that she did, undergoing a temporary social gender change from female to male and writing about it from a female point of view. An interesting note, after her "research" she actually signed herself into a mental health facility - it caused that much damage to her psyche.
Ms Vincent is rather unkind to the idea of MtF transsexual people in other ways but I think this book might help you figure out what you'd like to do for yourself. By all means, a gender therapist, which is not impossible to find in your country, can help you work things out too if you cannot go it alone. Good luck and fare well, flexible, I hope you find an accommodation to the patriarchy that works for you.
hugs & smiles
Emelye
I don't agree with everyone who's jumping in saying 'if you're not transsexual don't even think about it!'
Historically there are numerous accounts of women who did exactly what you are describing -- they were fed up with not being taken seriously as a woman and decided to pretend to be a man in order to 'improve their social standing' usually by means of getting a job they couldn't have otherwise gotten. Just one example:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Tipton (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Tipton)
Now in America there is a big improvement in the way women are treated in society, but as you say, not all other countries have those improvements (and others are more improved, sigh). So no, I don't think it's at all crazy for you to want to try living as a man to see if life would be better for you.
What I will say is that it is an incredibly difficult thing to do if you're doing it for the reasons you're saying. As a transsexual, it's mostly a matter of aligning the external appearance with the internal identity. But for what you're talking about, you're basically thinking about living a double life -- one person on the inside and one person on the outside.
It's really not something you can pull off unless you are 110% dedicated. To be honest, if it's *really* what you want to do, you're going to do it no matter what we say, because otherwise you don't have the dedication required. And if you have that kind of dedication, then it seems to me like there might be simpler solutions that you would probably be equally capable of doing, so in that case it really might not be the smartest choice.
So I guess what I'm mainly saying is, yes it's possible, no it's not crazy, but is it *really* what you want to do?
Quote from: Ketsy on March 20, 2010, 11:12:05 AM
I don't agree with everyone who's jumping in saying 'if you're not transsexual don't even think about it!'
Historically there are numerous accounts of women who did exactly what you are describing -- they were fed up with not being taken seriously as a woman and decided to pretend to be a man in order to 'improve their social standing' usually by means of getting a job they couldn't have otherwise gotten. Just one example:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Tipton (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Billy_Tipton)
Quite true, Ketsy, but Flexible is talking about becoming legally male and is asking about hormones and such. Billy Tipton and many others like him did not irrevocably alter their bodies. I feel that such alterations require special attention and a great deal of introspection.
I believe that these days we actually have a much stricter view of what "passes" as male (and perhaps female, but I won't consider that here) than in the past. In the nineteenth and early twentieth centuries, male clothing was a much more definitive marker of male gender than it is now. Occupations had the same effect. And people didn't have HRT and modern medical advances back then; a short man with a high voice could still be seen as a man if he wore male clothing, had a male occupation (and wasn't a complete failure at it), adopted some stereotypical male mannerisms, and didn't have any really obvious cleavage. He wouldn't have to worry about identification documents, either.
It's harder today to pull a Billy Tipton, at least in America. I don't know if it would be as hard in Flexible's country, but I suspect that it might be.
Anyway...
I would think that going from being 'cisgendered' woman - as you say, "I've always been a girl inside my head, and all the parts fit" and transitioning would make you gender dysphoric. For us who have been "blessed" with GID we choose to transition to help make the parts fit, right now they don't. I would imagine that changing from Estrogen to Testosterone would trigger that GID where it does not now exist. Why someone would want to do that baffles my mind.
That said, I understand that people throughout history have lived their lives presenting as their opposites. I don't know how many of those were transsexual, transgendered, or just doing it for social/political reasons and if so, how it would affect ones mind. It's an interesting scenario.
I wish you the best in your efforts.
Only if you're sure, really sure you won't regret it.
I want to transition because everyday is torture. I hate living like this, and I don't believe transition will be worse than feeling so pathetic all the time as I watch my body mutate.
Anyways- consider the consequences. If you live in the same area, those that still know you as a woman will likely think less of you. You'd need to be stealth for it to help you get a job, well I think so. Do you want to have kids? Do you want to marry/be a partner of a straight man? Because testosterone will destroy your beauty if it matters to you.
No, it's not a blessing. I hate living as a female and I wish I didn't have this problem, this gender dysphoria but it doesn't just go away because I will it to. It would be nice to not have to think about it or worry. Just be alright like everyone else in this department.
Thankyou to everyone who replied, I very much appreciate your input. I've had a talk with my mother about this, and I described what my intentions were. She was surprisingly intolerant of the suggestion. I guess to most that would've been expected, but my mother is the most non-judgmental person I know, and she normally trusts that I can decide things appropriately for myself. She outright told me that this was not the answer, though, and, like many of you have suggested, that there were better alternatives. I'm seriously now considering applying for a job in Canada, and moving out of my country (I am in the middle east, I'd rather not go into specifics about my home country). Canada because my experience and education would be just enough to grant me a temporary work visa. My only problem and great fear is that I don't know anybody there, and I am not married, so there would be no one to support me. Hopefully, if this works out, I will not have to transition and can escape from these confining working conditions by moving overseas. I am very excited at the prospect!
If it so happens that I cannot get a visa, or that it will take an excessively long time (I've heard for some it takes five years or more), I will reconsider becoming a man. Honestly, men have the ability to do whatever they want in my country, there are no legal limits for when they can go outside, what kind of jobs they can apply for, I want this experience for myself. If it generates gender dysphoria in me when presently none exists, then that will be unfortunate, but as it is, I cannot continue living like this. It is unbearable and it is making me very depressed.
Thankyou once again.
Hi..
A very interesting thought . if your not like us who are trans people . my thoughts are not as a transperson, in the sence of male to female or female to male , more the mix of both male & female . & as i look at both sides i see pros & cons ,
I allso understand where you are coming from both where you live & yes your mind ., in why you are thinking this way . & yes it was not many years ago we in the english speaking world would think like many of you have thoughts concerning your lot in life,
For me i can live as a woman with out any of those concerns that you have . & yes here in new zealand , were we are more accepted as people not wether we are male or female ,
Thats the difference we have.
I am more accepted as a woman yet even with my male back ground it was not a issue nor is it now . age of cause, i m 62 & yes i can pull rank because of my back ground & that comes with age learning, how to do things , & yes acceptance is all a part of that life experance as a person .
If you have the guts to do what i have done & carry it off & be able to stand alone & go through hell & come out the other side ,
That does not say i did not accept help i did just not from where i thought i would get it . & from strangers .
It was not easy yet, i can stand on what i did & yes, no regrets to be able to live as i should be able to because i knew who i was . & going back 50 years .
I would not say if you are male or female or may be like i am a mix of both m & f .
Only you know that . & yes some times we have to do things that others do not understand .
All the best in what ever you do . & how you get there .
hugs xxx ,,
...noeleena...
Flexible,
That is great news about the possibility of a job in Canada. That could prove to be a very rewarding opportunity for you and give you a whole new outlook on life. I certainly hope this proves to be the case for you. Judging by your writing, you seem to be very well versed in English and would likely fit in well in the community in Canada.
Another thought came to mind about your thoughts of presenting as male. I know that in some countries, there are very strong feelings (and laws) against trans people. You may want to consider, or look into, how you would be treated if you were found out to be a woman "posing" as a man. This could be very, very dangerous for you. I also don't know how easily you would be able to pass as a boy/man presently. Are there medical professionals that you would be able to, safely, go to to administer you hormones and possibly surgeries? There is a lot that you would need to consider carefully.
I wish you all of the best.
Quote from: Deanna_Renee on March 22, 2010, 07:43:20 AM
Another thought came to mind about your thoughts of presenting as male. I know that in some countries, there are very strong feelings (and laws) against trans people. You may want to consider, or look into, how you would be treated if you were found out to be a woman "posing" as a man. This could be very, very dangerous for you. I also don't know how easily you would be able to pass as a boy/man presently. Are there medical professionals that you would be able to, safely, go to to administer you hormones and possibly surgeries? There is a lot that you would need to consider carefully.
Some Middle Eastern countries (I'm thinking specifically Iran here) actually recognize transsexuality and permit it to be treated, in some cases funded by the national healthcare system. Others, of course, don't, but my guess is that Flexible is located somewhere where treatment is possible.
That being said, as a (temporarily-displaced) Canadian, I do have to recommend Canada. It's a beautiful place and I hope you can get there, flexible.
Kyril,
I had heard that some Middle Eastern countries were open in regards to transitioning. It is interesting/wonderful to know that, in some cases, it is even funded. However, I have also heard of other countries where it is very much the opposite case.
Quote from: Deanna_Renee on March 22, 2010, 11:59:18 AM
Kyril,
I had heard that some Middle Eastern countries were open in regards to transitioning. It is interesting/wonderful to know that, in some cases, it is even funded. However, I have also heard of other countries where it is very much the opposite case.
And then there's Iran, where transition is used as a cure for homosexuality...I often wonder how those "trans" people cope and get through the day. Guess I should add more reading to my list.
What about being a female activist? You can do whatever you want bad enough in this world. Screw sexist people. I don't think this sounds like a good idea, what you want to do. I mean, if you just want to look like a man to be respected...maybe you have other issues?
Quote from: zombiesarepeaceful on March 22, 2010, 03:11:05 PM
What about being a female activist? You can do whatever you want bad enough in this world. Screw sexist people.
Such activism is still fatal in some countries.
if i were you, i would take a closer read at some of the other posts on here.
some of us trans guys, and women, lose alot.
Support from framily, jobs, respect.
Basically losing a little piece of everything.
If your doing this to be granted specific advantages of being a male, eg:better job oppurtunities, than you might want to think again.
Its easier said than done.
but good luck with whatever you chose.
Moving to a new country, though drastic, seems less drastic to me than transition. If you move to Canada, you can always move back, presumably. Or even go to another country entirely! But transition...well, if you "only" take T and then bind (don't get top surgery or any bottom surgery), then you could conceivably switch back to living as a female. Your voice would probably be very deep for a woman's, and you would spend a fortune in electrolysis, but you could get there. But seriously, explore all other options before you consider anything "transitional."