How do we go about selecting a surgeon that is right for our needs? Is it possible to have it all? Depth, aesthetics, sensitivity, ability to orgasm?
As I wait a few days away from my own surgery, I question myself whether I have done everything I can for my own well being and future. I believe I have and am very much looking forward to next week in what will be the beginning of a new life. Still ...I question as I wait.
What more can we do except:
1. Read as many people's experiences as possible.
2. Meet local people who have been to the same surgeon and get their direct input.
3. Have an in-depth consultation with the surgeon and try to get his honest assessment of the result you can expect, after he completes a physical exam.
I don't know that I can be guaranteed a perfect vagina, which doesn't make me feel great. But I am hopeful I can get a result that will be good enough to make me happy. Better than the original equipment. Still, I would like it to be perfect.
I have read so many people's stories here who are happy with their results. It is a little concerning that I have not read any truly bad experiences of the major surgeons, other than anonymous slander or hearsay. This leads you to think that surgery techniques are pretty advanced. I hope it is so.
Sleeping on this overnight I realize that the most important component is the trust between the patient and surgeon. The trust of both in each other will be critical to the final outcome. I very much trust my surgeon at this point, from all my research and working with his staff. When we meet each other in two days both he and I will be able to determine if we will work well together.
We have so much more information available to us than ever before, yet we still want more ...more result photos, more assurances, more guarantees. That is where trust and our own expectations are so important to how happy we will be in the end.
Question: What was most important to you, more data or your ability to trust your surgeon?
Valerie I think your list of three points nailed it absolutely perfectly!
You have clearly approached it in EXACTLY the right way and deserve a great result.
However I will add point 4. -If after some time (a year or so) you really aren't happy then you can always have a second go as I did, with a second surgeon. Perhaps don't do what I did and wait 25 years though!
I reckon I now do have a, from my own perspective, practically perfect vagina - but it took the skills of two different surgeons combined to achieve it. The first gave me monster depth... the second tidied it all up and gave me nice pretty and natural girly bits.
Orgasm really shouldn't be a problem with any surgeon who is any good at his job at all! I certainly have no difficulties and I have no doubt that you wont either - so don't worry.
J. x.
I'm beginning to believe the results are as individual as the persons having the surgery. Your age, health, physical makeup, the surgeon's ability to work with what you have, the surgeon being "on" or "off" that day, even your attitude - they all affect the outcome. So no matter who you choose, there's an element of doubt as to how the results will turn out.
I'm so-so about my GRS. The results were less than what I had hoped. But at least that "thing" is gone.
I have change my mind on my surgeon at least 1/2 dozen times, and I will till I know I have the funds to pay for it. Then I will make my choice. But one of the contributing factors is the amount of money I will have to spend.
the one thing that bothers me as I read other peoples results, are they are either fantastically happy or completely devastated by the result.
Now, some people wrote very accurate and descriptive depictions of what happened before, during, or after their surgery but, it seems human nature that we can only be bothered to write about something that we feel strongly about, and this leads to results being skewed somewhat. I remember I used to do a paintball review website where we used a point based system to do reviews, and it was so much better than the user review places where people were much more apt to either love it or hate it.
Perhaps that is what we need, a web site that breaks down all the reasonable categories into points, and allow people who have had SRS, FFS, etc to enter results for each category and then drop a couple of the highest and lowest scores, and then average the rest in each category, so that people could see things like bedside manner, sensation, depth, accommodations, etc as separate entries.
Before choosing a surgeon I did all the things you mentioned and I'm happy with my choice. All I can think about now is how much I want this to be over, and how committed I am to seeing it through. I seem to have grown rather philosophical about it all lately, but I am thoroughly enjoying the feeling of rightness it is giving me.
But for now, I'm so excited for you Valerie! I wish you all the very best of luck and happiness and contentment with your surgery results, and in your life. Please keep us posted! :)
I am also happy with my choice of surgeon; I'm surprised (not really!) at the reactions of those who I've told (doctors, family). They act as though going outside the US is a very bad thing, when the reality is that no one does what my surgeon does here in the US, in a single stage procedure. Cost was the least of the factors in importance. I personally don't want a two or three stage thing, and most US surgeons don't like to do urethral hookups. So that left me with two guys, one in Canada and one in Serbia. I think people would have balked less if I went to Canada.
But so far every patient I've spoken to who has used my surgeon has been satisfied with the results (what they expected) but the experience of Serbia was phenomenal and awesome and the surgeons/nurses have excellent bedside manners.
Choose someone you can work with.
Jay
Quote from: FairyGirl on April 15, 2010, 07:29:01 PM
Before choosing a surgeon I did all the things you mentioned and I'm happy with my choice. All I can think about now is how much I want this to be over, and how committed I am to seeing it through. I seem to have grown rather philosophical about it all lately, but I am thoroughly enjoying the feeling of rightness it is giving me.
I pretty much knew I would eventually have my surgery in Montreal from the get-go as I had known two people who had theirs with Dr. Menard who is now retired. Living in Canada, Montreal just seemed to be the place to go.
I was a little apprehensive about setting my date--wondering if this is truly the right thing to do--but as time went on the fear turned to anticipation. Each day now brings new happiness and my confidence is soaring. Those I encounter on a daily or semi-daily basis notice this and many changes are happening all around. Good changes. I'm surrounded by positives all around. In many ways, ways which are a little too difficult to articulate at the moment, it seems as though my body, mind and spirit are all working together preparing for a successful outcome and a new life.