Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transitioning => Coming out of the closet => Topic started by: tori319 on May 01, 2010, 01:14:58 AM

Title: Coming out
Post by: tori319 on May 01, 2010, 01:14:58 AM
I unfortunately don't just have to worry about parents ,My mom has 5 brothers and 4 sisters and I have a lot of cousins and we're a close family( or so we'll see)and everybody's pretty homophobic and Christian and I really wouldn't know where to start.So far I plan on getting permission from my therapist for hormones ,and I guess I plan to wait until I start to look more feminine to tell anybody because even though I'm 18 I'm still dependent on my mother and I'm sure certain family members will try to convince my mother to stop supporting me.

Post Merge: May 02, 2010, 04:08:25 AM

So I guess my plan is perfect.
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: sneakersjay on May 03, 2010, 05:13:08 PM
Coming out is never easy and you never know how the news will be received.

All I can say is, coming from a religious family also, it was a non-issue.  That also could have been due to the fact that I'm older and have my own life, and maybe they figured it would be pointless to interfere.

Good luck!  Sometimes parents love their children more than their beliefs, and while they may be shocked and scared etc, many come around eventually.

Jay
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: Kay on May 03, 2010, 06:23:26 PM
Hi Tori,
.
Youre pretty young at 18, so hormones are going to have a noticeable effect rather quickly.  Don't plan on that waiting period before you tell your family being more than a couple of months...else they'll be approaching you about the changes...instead of the other way around.
.
If your mom does stop supporting you, do you have a back-up plan?
.
Take care,
.
Kay
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: Radar on May 03, 2010, 10:31:11 PM
Quote from: sneakersjay on May 03, 2010, 05:13:08 PMThat also could have been due to the fact that I'm older and have my own life, and maybe they figured it would be pointless to interfere.

This is one good thing about transitioning later in life.
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: tori319 on May 04, 2010, 12:21:46 PM
I think the worse thing that would happen is I would have to stop having to take hrt ,but my mom would never kick me out.
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: cynthialee on May 04, 2010, 12:38:40 PM
You never know how a family will take it. I come from christian stock. (well they ussed to be) Very conservative faith. My family has all been very suportive.
My wife (also in transition) has semi religious open minded family who do church once in a blue moon. They are not handleing our transitions well at all.

So it is a situational thing and you never know how it will turn out.
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: tori319 on May 04, 2010, 11:52:20 PM
Do you really think It will be that obvious that soon?
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: justmeinoz on May 05, 2010, 01:10:23 AM
Have you thought about telling them you want to be a Nun?? :laugh:
Title: Re: Coming out
Post by: aubrey on May 05, 2010, 01:18:01 AM
It depends on your individual genes, metabolism, etc...but more than likely being that young yes it will be obvious in one way or another fairly soon, not that you will wake up with DDs or anything. Only 2 weeks after starting HRT my sister could tell, merely from the change in skin tone and how much calmer I was. You can't possibly make every preperation before HRT (an approach I never could understand) but it helps to get the word out ASAP rather than wait and see how people will react, because the reaction could potentially be a bit more disasterous when people close to you feel like you're hiding things from them.