I don't ever intend on having penetrative sex, as in with a penis or some other dildo. So maintaining depth is not really much of an issue for me. I would still like to have a vagina though, a bit of finger room so to speak. So I was wondering, what actually happens if you don't dilate - does it completely close up?
I emailed Dr Chettawut about it, but was wondering if there were any girls out there that stopped dilating and what the results of that was?
Thanks
nicole
omg
why would you, it isnt just penetration, well the quick short answer is it closes up and all that money you spent goes down the drain along with probably more for future surgery to correct.
Thanks for that Vex. I guess that is the real question, would it cause any 'medical' issues down the line. But all the sites I looked at just talk about needing to do it to maintain depth. I'm not all that concerned with depth so was wondering what the consequences might be. Definitely would be something to discuss with the surgeon before hand.
Now I realise it is not all about penetration Vanna. But lets face it, dilation requires some dedication. If you are not prepared to do it then perhaps the surgery is not for you. But if the reasons for dilations are not something I am concerned about then hey, bugger doing it if you don't have to.
Nicky
Two things.
1. When you have the bits your feelings about penetrative sex may change - remember lesbians do have dildos fingers and other bits...
2. As regards dilation 26 years postop I dilate somewhere between once a week and once a fortnight. I have never lost any depth or girth (I can still sink the largest size all the way up to the end!), but you do need to keep up at least a bare minimum and indeed you could suffer some health issues if you don't keep things open and clean inside.
So whilst dilation postop is non optional - it certainly doesn't have to be a longterm burden. Once a week, incorporated into your sex play with your lover can be quite fun!
Thanks Jenny and Vex
This is just one of those questions I have had swinging around in my head. It would be silly to have such an invasive procedure and then lose it for lack of maintenance.
But that is a good point. I might not think it now, but later I don't want to regret not having as much as I could get, and being congruent is important.
Thanks for asking this, Nicky, and for the responses. As I go through the dilation schedule I was wondering the same thing. If I'm doing all this only to have receptive sex, I better get some at some point!
But it is more than that. Because of my age and the low possibility that I will have a male partner, I had considered having surgery to just get a cosmetic vagina (the outer look without the pocket – I forget what it's called). But I'm glad I went for the whole package.
The way I feel having it is amazing. It is not so much a physical feeling as a deep, down-in-my-core feeling of being right for the first time in my life. I can't explain it well, but a few of my GG friends seem to understand. It really has nothing to do with whether or not I can have sex.
So bottom line: I will continue to faithfully dilate to keep this wonderful part of me healthy, just as I exercise to keep other parts of me healthy.
- Kate
Quote from: K8 on May 24, 2010, 08:46:08 AM
The way I feel having it is amazing. It is not so much a physical feeling as a deep, down-in-my-core feeling of being right for the first time in my life. I can't explain it well, but a few of my GG friends seem to understand. It really has nothing to do with whether or not I can have sex.
For me it's not about sex either. For me it's all about taking my life to the next level
Quote from: ƃuıxǝʌ on May 24, 2010, 03:49:40 AMI also want to be as congruent with cisgender women as possible - which means having a vagina with at least 6 inches of depth.
And that's my main reasoning as well. It's not about the sex right now anyway, but if I pay near $20,000 for a vagina I would also like to use it at some point. :laugh:
"Dear Ms.Nicole
I have a lot of patients who desire like you.
If the patients confirm to have functional depth (even they're lesbian), it will be their full responsibility to maintain the original depth I created for life by diligent dilatation.
Ignorance for regular dilatation might cause shorten or collapse with time due to the skin graft contraction and there will be multiple factors individually implicate such complication.
Hope to see you someday.
Regards,
Dr.Chettawut"
Quote from: Kristyn on May 24, 2010, 09:06:58 AM
For me it's not about sex either. For me it's all about taking my life to the next level
for me, its for both, sex and taking life to new steps, just becuase i dont have SRS i stay away from some guys that I know would freak out, but once I have SRS i will be able to probably have a relationship which such a person. (hard to explain)
Quote from: K8 on May 24, 2010, 08:46:08 AMBut I'm glad I went for the whole package.
The way I feel having it is amazing. It is not so much a physical feeling as a deep, down-in-my-core feeling of being right for the first time in my life. I can't explain it well, but a few of my GG friends seem to understand. It really has nothing to do with whether or not I can have sex.
Thanks for this, Kate. I'm hoping I'll have the same feeling even when my new junk is microsized instead of average sized....just being anatomically correct for once will be huge!
Hope you're feeling well!
Jay
Hi Nicole, yeah as the others said, it starts to close up. I don't think it would close up completely, but you need to dilate to maintain diameter and length. I hear all the time about ladies who slack on dilating and lose an inch or two. It also hurts more when they try to dilate more regularly and can't use sizes they could use before. In my opinion, dilating is a small price to pay, and personally, I really don't mind it so much.
A couple months ago there was a thread about having surgery sans birth canal. It is an option if you are interested. Since that thread I've heard from a surgeon that says it's easier for them to do.
I have thought of that, but I don't think I would feel complete.
I'm resigned to dialation, it will get easier over time, but I'm just exploring the possibility of not having to do it.
like a lot of things in life I guess, better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it :)
Well just as a matter of interest, I have not dilated for the past 8 weeks and only last night was I able to finally able to do so. Did I lose any depth or width? No! Any pain? No! Any bleeding No!
What with the moving, the new job location setting up home, work and getting involved in the local community, having a cold and on top of that having to go back for a second screening on my left breast I never had the time and dilating was one of the last things on my mind.
I have mentioned in another thread, that I have gone much longer and never followed anywhere near the rigorous routine of dilation that has been mentioned in other threads. Rejennyrated also mentions the lack of dilation on her part (correct me if I am wrong Rejennyrated) and more than likely there are other girls that have not dilated for a while and having experienced no problems after a prolonged absence from doing so.
I had my surgery over 19 years ago and thanks to my surgeon I have never had any problems. That is not to say that some girls have problems.
So if I have not had any problems over all those years and the technology and techniques of the doctors and surgeons is improving, then I would say that girls that have the surgery done today will not have any problems with a collapsing vagina. It would be given that this is a major concern for all the surgeons and girls, that one of the most paramount concerns is none would want a collapsing vagina so the surgical techniques that are used would ensure that this does not happen.
In so far as not having any depth, I did not know about this over 21 years ago when I changed and the only thing on my mind was I wanted to function as any normal female would want, whether I had sex or not was never an overriding concern for me.
As FairyGirl said "like a lot of things in life I guess, better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it", excellent, well said, one cannot get any better than that. Hence you might as well have a fully functioning vagina and deal with the dilation issues. Because you will never know, when you just might need it.
In regards to Dr Chettawut reply the operative word is "might", and as I have mentioned in another thread. I usually dilate once a week, but I do not let it rule my life and when I'm home my other half takes care of my needs. :embarrassed:
Kind regards
Sarah B
The other post that I made in regards to dilation is here. (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,72932.msg498130.html#msg498130)
Hi ƃuıxǝʌ
I do not expect any problems in regards to my vagina closing and there have been periods of time when I did not dilate for longer periods.
However, I generally dilate once every week or fortnight and yes if you have a partner you have no dilation problem :embarrassed:
Kind regards
Sarah B
Quote from: ƃuıxǝʌ on May 24, 2010, 11:13:30 PM
Sarah B, one should not expect any problems after 19 years - you could probably get away with dilating once every two months, or if you're sexually active with a penetrating partner, you won't need to dilate at all.
The most important stage of dilation is in the first 3 months after surgery, as the body will attempt to close the surgical site.
Sarah B. - ƃuıxǝʌ is correct. The reason I don't have to dilate all that often is that I am fairly regularly having some form of penetrative sex.
I wouldn't say that I exactly neglect to dilate - I just don't do it so religiously often these days. I use it as a quick method of checking depth and girth. So, for example, if I were going on holiday I wouldn't bother taking the dilators...
25years postop I dialate maybe once every 2weeks, might go to a 3rd week, but I do have regular sexual intercourse with my boyfriend (fiancé)
It might be different if I didn't have a boyfriend.
p
do they come in vibrating models? :angel:
I guess once you heal up there probably is no reason why you couldn't use a vibrator.... :-*
Quote from: Nicky on May 25, 2010, 04:25:13 PM
I guess once you heal up there probably is no reason why you couldn't use a vibrator.... :-*
Just leave your hole open and dilated you can use it for storage later *whistles* lol
Great place to hide your keys when out swimming :D
Quote from: Nicky on May 26, 2010, 05:43:18 PM
Great place to hide your keys when out swimming :D
hahaah indeed
It will probably be different once I am healed, but I've found dilating helps loosen up that area. With the swelling and the soreness, there were times I would wake up in the morning feeling like someone had wedged a board sideways between my legs. Walking would only loosen the tenseness so much. After dilating I would start feeling better - more flexible and limber, inside and out.
So at least in the beginning, dilation has helped me feel more 'normal' as far as being able to move about easily. It's like a form of internal exercise. :)
- Kate
Quote from: Sarah B on May 24, 2010, 11:06:33 PM
Well just as a matter of interest, I have not dilated for the past 8 weeks and only last night was I able to finally able to do so. Did I lose any depth or width? No! Any pain? No! Any bleeding No!
What with the moving, the new job location setting up home, work and getting involved in the local community, having a cold and on top of that having to go back for a second screening on my left breast I never had the time and dilating was one of the last things on my mind.
I have mentioned in another thread, that I have gone much longer and never followed anywhere near the rigorous routine of dilation that has been mentioned in other threads. Rejennyrated also mentions the lack of dilation on her part (correct me if I am wrong Rejennyrated) and more than likely there are other girls that have not dilated for a while and having experienced no problems after a prolonged absence from doing so.
I had my surgery over 19 years ago and thanks to my surgeon I have never had any problems. That is not to say that some girls have problems.
So if I have not had any problems over all those years and the technology and techniques of the doctors and surgeons is improving, then I would say that girls that have the surgery done today will not have any problems with a collapsing vagina. It would be given that this is a major concern for all the surgeons and girls, that one of the most paramount concerns is none would want a collapsing vagina so the surgical techniques that are used would ensure that this does not happen.
In so far as not having any depth, I did not know about this over 21 years ago when I changed and the only thing on my mind was I wanted to function as any normal female would want, whether I had sex or not was never an overriding concern for me.
As FairyGirl said "like a lot of things in life I guess, better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it", excellent, well said, one cannot get any better than that. Hence you might as well have a fully functioning vagina and deal with the dilation issues. Because you will never know, when you just might need it.
In regards to Dr Chettawut reply the operative word is "might", and as I have mentioned in another thread. I usually dilate once a week, but I do not let it rule my life and when I'm home my other half takes care of my needs. :embarrassed:
Kind regards
Sarah B
The other post that I made in regards to dilation is here. (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,72932.msg498130.html#msg498130)
Funny you should say this.
There are times that I get so tied up with work and life that I don't get a chance to dilate, or that I am not having sex with someone.
Post surgically I of course was diligent with my dilation regimen, but as the years have gone by I have not been as rigid in my regimen.
What will occur is that when I dilate, masturbate, or have sex is that my vagina may be initially tighter, but then after a few minutes she will regain her flexibility.
I "try" to dilate every week or fortnight at the outside, though I don't always meet that goal.
But bottom line, my vagina tells me when she feels she is due for dilation.