Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Female to male transsexual talk (FTM) => Topic started by: Brendon on May 25, 2010, 11:38:28 PM

Title: A little help please...
Post by: Brendon on May 25, 2010, 11:38:28 PM
First off, hi. This is my first post here, so of course I intend to use it to solicit you all for help.  ;)

Next year I'll be going to a high school where I'll have to live on campus; they don't give you any other option. I've already talked to the person who does housing, and she honestly strikes me as being somewhat incompetent. She flat out told me that unless I had bottom surgery I would still be a girl, and I would have to stay in the girl dorms (even though she said they could have given me single housing, they just chose not to). I don't live in a state where trans people are in any way protected, but I do live in a state where you don't have to have surgery to change your gender on your birth certificate. I fully intend to change my name and gender on my birth certificate before school starts, and I'll probably have started testosterone by then too.

My question is, can she legally make me live in the girls' dorms if I'm legally male? I'm not sure if it makes any difference in the answer, but it's a public high school.

Any help would be appreciated, thanks.  :)
Title: Re: A little help please...
Post by: shanetastic on May 25, 2010, 11:50:32 PM
if you're legally male she obviously can't force you into girls dorms. . .

but. . . why not just go to a different highschool!?!?  I mean that sounds pretty absurd a live in highschool with incompetent staff
Title: Re: A little help please...
Post by: confused on May 25, 2010, 11:55:11 PM
Hi
although i'm not familiar with the laws there , but it's logically impossible for anyone to force a guy in girls' dorms if it says so on his papers , it would even get her in trouble i think
good luck with the certificate , T and the new school :)
Title: Re: A little help please...
Post by: zombiesarepeaceful on May 26, 2010, 12:17:50 PM
I wouldn't put up with it. Fight for your rights, or don't go there.
Title: Re: A little help please...
Post by: Arch on May 26, 2010, 12:36:56 PM
Are you in the US? I would shoot out an e-mail (or make a call) to a trans legal organization. Look up The Transgender Law and Policy Institute or maybe the Transgender Legal Defense and Education Fund. In California, the Transgender Law Center can help.

If nothing else, you can drop a reference to such an organization as a not-so-subtle threat to this woman while you are busy changing your documents at the various agencies.

When are housing arrangements made? Do they have accommodation available in both dorms? I can see them saying, "Well, we're making housing arrangements NOW, and your documents say female NOW...by the time you get your docs changed, it will be too late!" But don't let them pull that.

Keep us posted. This is very interesting.

P.S. Sounds like that woman doesn't know anything about trans stuff. Did you tell her that FTMs can change their DL, Social Security, and BC without bottom surgery?

If you can change your BC and your license, that will certainly help. But I didn't know that any US states allow a BC change without surgery or a court order. Are you sure about this? I would love to know more.
Title: Re: A little help please...
Post by: Brendon on May 26, 2010, 02:29:54 PM
Quote from: shanetastic on May 25, 2010, 11:50:32 PM
but. . . why not just go to a different highschool!?!?  I mean that sounds pretty absurd a live in highschool with incompetent staff

I know it sounds like a really bad idea, but at the school I was going to my friend got pushed down the stairs for being a lesbian and the kid that did it pretty much got away with it. Supposedly, the students at the new school are more liberal and there is a pretty good number of queer kids. The person in charge of housing is the only one giving me any problems.
Title: Re: A little help please...
Post by: Devin87 on May 26, 2010, 02:34:41 PM
Talk to your admissions counselor or the admissins office or the dean of students or anyone who's supposed to fight for students with problems.  If the school really is liberal and gay-friendly, someone will be willing to help you.
Title: Re: A little help please...
Post by: Brendon on May 26, 2010, 02:44:09 PM
Quote from: Arch on May 26, 2010, 12:36:56 PM
If you can change your BC and your license, that will certainly help. But I didn't know that any US states allow a BC change without surgery or a court order. Are you sure about this? I would love to know more.

I'm sorry that I wasn't more clear on this  :embarrassed:  What I mean is, the guys at the trans support group I go to said that you just have to write an addendum at the bottom of your name change papers to have your gender changed too (our state doesn't have any papers for a gender change; so, if you don't do it with your name change you have to file a petition that doesn't actually exist ??? ). I guess the end result is a court order? Only one person there who has tried this before having surgery has had any problems (and I'm not entirely clear on whether he tried to file it with his name change or by itself), and he's currently in the process of working it out. Everyone else got their gender changed with no problems.