I used to marvel that so many transwomen seemed to "go full time" after a few months on HRT. Just couldn't quite get my brain around it.
Now, just shy of 4 months in, still quite visibly sporting mis-matched chromosomes, I realize I'm in all the way, despite it all. I've quit the Lodge, wear women's clothes to the office, and have my day in court next Friday to petition for a legal name change.
HR now has a pretty enthusiastic letter from my therapist & MD on file, and I passed on a few links intended to help brief them on transfolk in the work place.
My boss is trying to talk the Executives into bumping up the clearance level on my security badge so I can use their private restroom and not have to share a restroom with men while we figure out wtf to do with some of the details coming down the pipe. (I said he should feel free to mention that a 14-year-old bottle of scotch would mysteriously appear in said restroom should they give the nod. I know my Executives well.)
Heck, the COO started shooting the breeze with me in the hallway today, and with me sporting a bright green summer top & lace camisole, he said, "I didn't know you had tattoos."
sounds fabulous
Sounds like things are going great for you ^_^
Well, one hopes for the best.
My usual assumptions about everything ending in tears haven't been panning out lately. heh
IMHO, I think you can change your assumptions of things ending in tears, to an assumption of that you're stronger now.
Quote from: SydneyTinker on July 16, 2010, 10:20:34 PMNow, just shy of 4 months in, still quite visibly sporting mis-matched chromosomes, I realize I'm in all the way, despite it all.
Isn't it funny how that happens? You get a real taste of what it's like just being you, and you've got to have it all the time! =)
Heh yup! Plus, every little change builds up more inertia, i think.
Post Merge: July 24, 2010, 10:07:03 AM
Yesterday afternoon the COO chatted with my boss & me in one of those closed-door meetings.
When my boss had inquired about use of the executive restroom (the only non-gender-specific restroom in the building), apparently the COO had said that ladies use the ladies' room, so that's what I'd be using once we could sort out the details.
When I returned from a vacation day Tuesday morning, I was told that tidbit, asked to transmit a more formal "yo I'm transitioning" thing to my boss to initiate the real work ahead, and received a forwarded copy of a very progressive piece on embracing transgender employees that the COO had sent to local HR, my boss, and my boss's boss.
I fired off a fairly lengthy email touching on insurance concerns, ethics, workplace presentation, the delicate timing of it all, etc.
As yesterday morning was my scheduled name change court date, eyes were on me when I returned to the office, and he had wanted to make sure I didn't feel that they were dragging feet unduly. The status update was that all the managers know of my transition (which I had figured out immediately due to behavioral changes), corporate was going to have to sort out the legal ramifications, draft new transgender policy materials for HR, etc.
He added that as my manager on up "like the quality of [my] work and [my] attitude" nothing else mattered in the slightest. He noted that I've obviously been full time for a while already and hoped that I wouldn't be offended if people stumble some in learning to address me in a different manner and with a new name, which he started using on the spot.
Sydney, thanks for sharing your good news, I am so happy for you. It's very encouraged for me to see the successful coming-out-at-work stories, can't wait to start mine! hope that goes well also.
Yay for you!
Good news :)
congrats!
Jay
This is fantastic news! You must be so relieved.
The thought of coming out at work terrifies me at the moment (big company, corporate environment), so it is great to hear positive results like this.
Thanks so much for sharing!
-Gwen
Yup. Now, if only the boys at the Lodge weren't apparently about to take me to trial for "Unmasonic Conduct".... ::)
Quote from: SydneyTinker on August 03, 2010, 07:54:15 AM
Yup. Now, if only the boys at the Lodge weren't apparently about to take me to trial for "Unmasonic Conduct".... ::)
When Alison transitioned back in the mid 80's she resigned voluntarily before they could do so.
Decades later of course we now live in a place with an active ladies lodge, and although I would not join because I have other loyalties, Alison... ;)
Quote from: rejennyrated on August 03, 2010, 08:27:52 AM
When Alison transitioned back in the mid 80's she resigned voluntarily before they could do so.
Decades later of course we now live in a place with an active ladies lodge, and although I would not join because I have other loyalties, Alison... ;)
Alas, I've been told that this jurisdiction doesn't allow voluntary resignation. I requested to do so weeks ago.
Awesome news on the name change. Sad news on the Lodge.
Transition some times will feel like it got away from us, and other times it seems to be stuck.
Actually, even the name change is facing a bit of a delay. The law in my state requires that I track down whatever agency in TX is the analog of my state's Department of Health and serve a summons for them to tell the local court here whether they object to the change.
Yay!!!! I was the same way.
I started dressing 24/7 outside of work in October, started hormones in December, planned on coming out at work in April. Well by late January, I realized my new voice was poking through at work already on accident and it didn't take much motivation for me to change to February instead of April! hehehe
This kind of happened to me as well. I was on Hormones since last June and began expressing myself gradually going through androgynous then suddenly realized I was presenting full time as a female. I felt horribly uncomfortable going to the mens room. Soon after the announcement was made (March of this year) and have been full time ever since. Gender flag changed at work, insurance, etc.
I know some people pick a specific day to transition at work but that wouldn't have worked for me!
A co-worker who has been frankly unenthusiastic about my transition, but who has consistently made an effort to not let her feelings get in the way... gave me a "Ma'am" today, one of my first.
I was appreciative, but curious.
Later in the day she revealed that while having a replacement security badge made for herself earlier, she had seen my security badge photo before she came to hers. That seems to have been the moment of truth for her, as it was taken well before HRT and featured a military short hair cut & sharp tie.
After that, looking up at me in her doorway, she saw that I was absolutely not "sir" any more. 8) (My current presentation is decidedly more feminine than my avatar pic, BTW.)
I had planned to make my workplace transition in July of 2009, figuring I would give myself a good year on HRT before transition and just over a year to grow my hair out. Well, that plan got pushed way up until April. The timing worked out well, a position I wanted opened up in May, so I ended up actually getting promoted within days of my workplace transition. It was pretty awesome to transition, and then get the news that I got my promotion.
I vowed I would never dress femme till I had my FFS. 6 months of hormones changed my thoughts dramatically. Altho I never wore dresses to work i would wear womens attire of very androgynous appearance along with a touch of mineral foundatin, purfume and a slight lip gloss. Most people never batted an eyelid but from what i understand from friends most people thought I was just expressing my gayness. I still used the male toilet tho as I hadnt come out to anyone
Very interesting story.
Everybody else here answered you way better than I could, so I really can't add anything other than my whole-hearted "moral support" for what you are doing.
All of you are SO brave. I admire you all. Really.
I'm about 7.5 months into HRT with estrogen and androgen blockade upped to full doses just withing the past month or so. I'm a tweenie now. Can't pass as a gal. Look like a peculiar guy. I dress androgenously. Have been for about 2 years or so. However, I'm basically presenting in guy mode. Don't think I'd pass in gal mode.
One of the gals on here lives nearby. She's gonna drag my butt out en femme ... soon. I'm scared but thrilled.
Hey, best of luck to you! Keep us posted about what's going on with you, okay? Thanks.
Quote from: Dee_pntx on August 07, 2010, 10:44:17 PM
They are gonna boot you over to the Eastern Star gals... ;)
...only if they trust me with their women.
Since I'm an out trans dyke at this point, some issues might yet remain. lol