Presumably the process of telling drains personal issues of the power to cause distress. If not then what is therapy for. Has it ever cured anybody. What is its function apart from providing therapists with interesting stories to listen to.
Quote from: geniebot on August 03, 2010, 03:30:40 AM
Presumably the process of telling drains personal issues of the power to cause distress. If not then what is therapy for. Has it ever cured anybody. What is its function apart from providing therapists with interesting stories to listen to.
all the carp about 'facing our isssues' never made sense to me ...so I have to go along with therapy just being titillation for the therapists...plus giving them ammo to fire back at us if we get uppity.
Therapy is supposed to help you out of fears, harmful behaviors, and insecurity, and along with that develop you into a functional, whole person.
Have either of you been to a therapist you got along with? I've been seeing mine for over a year, and the help she's given me has been immeasurable.
The best that can be said for these chatting therapies, is that some people get some relief from them.
Sadly, they are not regulated. Those offering them are not regulated. There is no properly constituted governing body and the claims of many of these people is preposterus beyond belief.
I can take my car to a mechanic, I can get someone to service my gas boiler, I can got to a Dr with some complaint, in each case, I can check for recognised qualifications and be as sure as I can that they will each deliver a recognised service.
These therapists could be almost anyone. Their qualifications, while frequently appearing impressive, are of little value in themselves. Their views and pronouncements are entirely subjective.
At best, they are paid friends. Rather like seeing a prostitute.
well in England we don't really bother with therapists as such but instead we use local psychiatrists or the staff of gender clinics but in my case I can say that of perhaps 50 such meetings I've never felt any benefit and generally feel that the people I've talked to have no real idea of what being TS is all about.
the only times I've walked out feeling good and happy are when the people have agreed to my suggestion that I'd like to change hormones or they've agreed to further my transition.
Quote from: spacial on August 04, 2010, 05:42:06 AM
At best, they are paid friends. Rather like seeing a prostitute.
A good therapist/counsellor is hard to find in the UK, but there are some, and the numerous personal reports on the UK sites speak for themselves.... It's not often I would disagree with you Spacial, but I think your sweeping statement above is more than a little unfair for the dedicated few who really care. On the regulation side, I totally agree and I would never see or recommend the ones making the unsupported claims you reffer to, however, it so often seems that the highest "qualified" are too often more interested in analysing trends and writing their next book, than helping real people.
Quote from: lilacwoman on August 04, 2010, 02:49:32 PM
well in England we don't really bother with therapists as such but instead we use local psychiatrists or the staff of gender clinics but in my case I can say that of perhaps 50 such meetings I've never felt any benefit and generally feel that the people I've talked to have no real idea of what being TS is all about.
the only times I've walked out feeling good and happy are when the people have agreed to my suggestion that I'd like to change hormones or they've agreed to further my transition.
...and that's exactly where the problem starts... I accept what you are saying, but the NHS clinics have no real therapists and just gave a baseline gatekeeper service for medication and surgery ...... hence most people in the UK have no idea how useful a good therapist can be when coping with GID and transition.
Quote from: geniebot on August 03, 2010, 03:30:40 AM
Presumably the process of telling drains personal issues of the power to cause distress. If not then what is therapy for. Has it ever cured anybody. What is its function apart from providing therapists with interesting stories to listen to.
For me, and others I have spoken to who have been lucky enough to find a good therapist in the UK, the process is a lot more about being able to recover some degree of control over my GID, and planning for the future without simply heading for a train wreck and seeing what happens. My therapist is experienced at the "rough end" of nursing post-op patients in recovery, sexual rehabilitation, gender therapy, and of course has sponsored a lot of UK transitioners.
The experience is more like speaking to a mentor than a friend, with the discussion including a significant degree of agreed action between meetings.
Chrissty
Quote from: Chrissty on August 12, 2010, 04:21:39 PM
A good therapist/counsellor is hard to find in the UK, but there are some, and the numerous personal reports on the UK sites speak for themselves.... It's not often I would disagree with you Spacial, but I think your sweeping statement above is more than a little unfair for the dedicated few who really care. On the regulation side, I totally agree and I would never see or recommend the ones making the unsupported claims you reffer to, however, it so often seems that the highest "qualified" are too often more interested in analysing trends and writing their next book, than helping real people.
I understand and accept your criticism.
There are, undoubtedly, many good therapists who act professionally.
But there are so many who are not and do not. These tout for business, add to an ever increasing list of conditions with snappy titles. They demoralise people. They convince people with quite basic problems, often caused by age or relationships that they have some chronic condition. Moreover, they impose their personal social and political values and judge their clients rather than encouraging them to judge themselves.
The lack of proper regulation means it is impossible to know which is which. The failure of the 'good' therapists to regulate themselves, or to attack the charlitans has effectively meant that there is little difference between the two.
It is always pleasing, I'm sure for everyone here, when someone reports that theiy have a good therapist and are achieving a lot. The issues surrounding the problem we all have in common, for example, are very significant. Thinking through what we should and will do is vital if others are not to end up making serious mistakes.
But there are too many examples of harm. I can never forgive the entire community of therapists for the utter scandal of the ODD disagnosis, which is still being used.
Honestly, the function of therapy is determined by the client.
I approached a therapist for HRT pre-screening, more or less. But that only took one visit.
She impressed me, though, and I've retained her services for some "quality of life" matters with which she's been a tremendous help.
I spent years in therapy and benefited from it. I'm not sure that I would have grown or even managed without it. My therapist – a licensed clinical psychologist – would listen and ask questions. She was trained to hear what I was saying and what I wasn't saying. She encouraged me to face some things I was working hard to avoid. There were very few times that she told me what to do, but as I felt my way through the process she would guide me. Just the struggle to articulate what was troubling me was helpful.
She was the third therapist I tried. She helped me grow into the person I need to be. I think that perhaps I could be still stuck at some earlier stage without her.
YMMV
- Kate
Quote from: spacial on August 15, 2010, 03:55:39 AM
I understand and accept your criticism.
There are, undoubtedly, many good therapists who act professionally.
....
It is always pleasing, I'm sure for everyone here, when someone reports that theiy have a good therapist and are achieving a lot.
...So I think it's worth mentioning a name.... Sharon Fillingham @ Transhealth ... Highly experienced in Gender matters both physiological and surgical, supportive, unshockable, 100% professional .... ;)
Chrissty
Therapy ... Ugh ...
I started therapy in order to get the letters needed to start HRT. All Therapy has done is force me to put myself under a microscope and realize exactly how much I dislike my body and want live full time.
The therapist I have, though, doesn't seem to feel she's qualified to write the letter, so I think I need to find another one. Problem I'm having now, all the PhD's that I've found on the web in my area aren't returning my messages. (I want a PhD so I can more easily get the letters needed to change my name, birth certificate, and make getting the GRS letter a bit easier. I also think I'd feel less like I was talking to a "quack" if they have a doctorate.)
I feel like the whole therapist thing is a gigantic roadblock in the process. I think their role should be to help us deal with the social and emotional changes we experience on our path.
*Grumbles and goes back to searching for psychologists on the web*
Quote from: Epigania on August 21, 2010, 11:18:53 AM
I think their role should be to help us deal with the social and emotional changes we experience on our path.
I completely agree, and that was my experience with the two PhD psychologists I saw to get my two letters. (And both concentrated mainly on my social role and emotional needs. There was almost no discussion of how I felt about my body.) I found both through word-of-mouth - asking friends and others I know. Good luck, Epigania.
- Kate