If you know me you would never call me a Buddhist but I have been reading books on Buddhism and Eastern Philosophy for more than a year now. The first book I read was "Buddhism, Plain and Simple". I was reluctant at first because I had images in my head of men in robes walking around chanting. But just like anything else, if you don't open yourself to knowledge you'll forever have your head in the sand.
As I read the book I found myself thinking, "This sounds like a belief system that's designed for TGs." It's a very logical approach to life and, if you follow the basic premise of it, accepting others for who they are is one of the more important practices a Buddhist follows.
From what I've learned, followers of Buddhism care more about your inner self than what you look like, how successful you are or how popular you are. They see life for exactly what it is and don't put a spin on it, not theirs or anyone else's. When a person comes up to you and says your shoelaces are untied, it doesn't mean you're a dummy or they noticed something you missed or that you're just like a little kid and need to be told something as obvious as that. It just means your shoelaces are untied, nothing more.
Apply that to being TG and instead of seeing a man dressed as a woman or a woman dressed as a man, they simply see a person who has clothes on. While their attire may say something about them, they pass no judgement on it. You are who you are.
A lot of the inner peace I have achieved has come from the lessons I have learned and applying them to my life. If someone tells me I'm wrong I don't take that as a challenge to prove I'm right. It just tells me they disagree with me. There is no effect on me, the person. I am still the same. When someone tells me I'm nuts for transitioning, I know they disagree with my decision and I recognize they have their opinions and, just like me, they have a right to their opinions. Their opinion has no effect on me.
My children distancing themselves from me was at first devastating. This ate away at me incessantly. It was a cancer in my soul and I anguished about all the time. Once I opened my eyes I realized this has no bearing on me and who I am They are just misinformed and at some time in their lives they will understand. If that never happens then it never happens. While I would love for them to be an active part of my life, I hold no ill will towards them nor do I beat myself up about my decision nor do I anguish about it any more. It just is what it is.
Another aspect I like about Buddhism is disassociating oneself from Ego. Ego is the reason we take things personally. And when we take things personally, other things get stirred up and before you know it we are a bundle of stressed out nerves. Wanting to rid myself of that feeling is one reason I've adopted some of the teachings of Buddha. This has lead to an inner peace I have never known. I won't go back to my old way of thinking anymore than I'll go back to living life as a man. I like living in peace.
In its strictest sense Buddhism certainly isn't for everyone. But in a general sense I feel there's something everyone can adopt from Buddhism that will make their life better. It certainly has mine.
Julie
Quote from: Julie Marie on December 10, 2006, 09:35:25 PM
In its strictest sense Buddhism certainly isn't for everyone. But in a general sense I feel there's something everyone can adopt from Buddhism that will make their life better. It certainly has mine.
I stumbled upon Zen a few decades ago. God, what a cruel fate for an overthinker like me, lol... I twisted and turned for years, squirmed and cursed, threw the books against the wall, decided it was a bunch of BS, hated them more for it all, bought more books...
And one day, walking from my office to the CAD room, someone said something to me. I don't remember what. Doesn't matter. But something inside me broke, and I couldn't stop laughing, lol...
And I STILL haven't... ;)
You're right, Julie. Most of the buddhist beliefs can actually be applied to transsexualism. In fact, I guess you could say that gender therapy focuses mainly on some of the famous buddhist quotes like these:
"Emptiness is infact form when we forget the self. There's nothing in the universe *other* than ourself. Nothing to compare, name, or identify. When it's the only thing there is, how can we talk about it??"
"When you expect something, when you aim at something, right there you dilute your energy; you split your energy, you split your attention and it becomes more than the place of yin and yang. You do not only divide, but you create the problem"
"Our life is shaped by our mind; we become what we think. Suffering follows an evil thought as the wheels of a cart follow the oxen that draws it. Our life is shaped by our mind; we become what we think. Joy follows a pure thought like a shadow that never leaves."
"Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose'
I personally love this one from Taizan Maezumi:
"Just live that life. It doesn't matter whether it is life or hell, life of the hungry ghost, life of the animal, it's okay; just live that life, see. And as a matter of fact no other way. Where you stand, where you are, that's what your life is right there, regardless of how painful it is or how enjoyable it is. That's what it is".
tinkerbell :icon_chick:
Hey Julie,
While I am not particularly religious, I also have investigated Buddism and found the same thing as you. I agree with your post and have found my way to forgive those who have failed to understand me or who have wronged me. My self worth no longer comes from the outside world, but from within. Only I can make myself happy and only I know what that is. No one can pretend to know better than me what is right for me.
I will not go back to living as a man because it makes me unhappy, I know I have tried. I have forgiven those who have wronged me and I will find my own way, whatever that turns out to be.
Love always,
Elizabeth
Quote from: Elizabeth on December 10, 2006, 11:02:15 PM
While I am not particularly religious...
The neat thing about Zen Buddhism in particular is that it's not really a
religion - at least not in the western sense of the word, with holy texts full of rules and events you have to memorize, priests who interpret God's will for you, and stuff like that. It's... DIFFERENT. You could actually "practice" zen while remaining a christian (though "practicing" zen isn't really zen... but... yea). And yet, I've always said that if you take a really, REALLY big pot, throw in ALL the world's religions, and boil it for like... centuries.... once all the fat and icky stuff have boiled away, you'd have this one little gem left down there... Zen.
Or actually, with zen, I guess it'd be empty. Or not empty, just not something there. Of course there's nothing to be not there, so maybe there's no pot either... or religions...
To be honest, there's actually no such thing as Zen... nevermind...
Quote from: Kate on December 10, 2006, 11:16:28 PM
Or actually, with zen, I guess it'd be empty. Or not empty, just not something there. Of course there's nothing to be not there, so maybe there's no pot either... or religions...
And thus the student was enlightened...
-Sandy (or not)
Tink, I read the quotes you posted. It reminded me why I couldn't grasp Buddhism the first dozen times I tried. To the newbie it can be somewhat confusing. You have to become a student, not just a casual observer.
Kate, I suspect your frustration was due to the way Zen was presented. While I never threw books at the wall I did put a lot down. But when I read "Buddhism, Plain and Simple" it clicked. The title describes the contents very accurately. Once I understood the basic premise of the belief I realized it suits my thinking very well. From there I read other books, many of them weren't about Buddhism but I could see the same common sense approach to life in their words that I found in Buddhism.
All my life I felt inner turmoil and conflict. I thought I would never be rid of it. Nothing I did helped. Through some of the teachings of Buddha and his followers I found the key to unlock the door and release the negativity within me. I'm not spiritual now, just happy.
Julie
Quote from: Julie Marie on December 11, 2006, 08:43:35 AM
Kate, I suspect your frustration was due to the way Zen was presented.
You got THAT right, sister, lol...
Which was their plan allllllll along, those mischevious little monks. To create an obsessive frustration. Something you can't let go of, yet can't "solve" either. Something that will drive you literally out of your mind until something snaps and you just... well... just have to shake your head and laugh at how difficult you made everything when it's always been
Right There all along, waiting for you.
Hey... waitasec... that sounds a bit like GID, doesn't it?
Why does *everything* in this world seem to reflect everything else? What a STRANGE place, lol...
Quote from: Kate on December 11, 2006, 09:06:39 AM
Which was their plan allllllll along, those mischevious little monks. To create an obsessive frustration. Something you can't let go of, yet can't "solve" either.
It's all designed to get you past your "logical mind' - to realize that reason, that voice in your head, isn't you.
(heard the sound of one hand clapping)
helen
Quote from: Kelly on December 12, 2006, 01:55:22 PM
The cool thing is that we don't actually have to learn anything, since the enlightened state is already inside of everyone....it just needs to be remembered and uncovered. We can bury our true "buddha nature" but it doesn't die, it is the only thing that lasts. We are all Buddhas/Angels, it's just that some are awakened already, some are trying to wake up, and others are still sleeping.
Heh... hmmm... tweaking... speaking to TSs in particular:
The cool thing is that we don't actually have to learn anything, since our true self is already inside of everyone....it just needs to be remembered and uncovered. We can bury our true self but it doesn't die, it is the only thing that lasts. We are all women already (or men), it's just that some are awakened already, some are trying to wake up, and others are still sleeping.Gotta love it. Ya just gotta. WHICH... is why I keep insisting this whole GID thing is really some spiritual quest in disguise. It just translates SO perfectly. It's the same story retold in countless ways... and we get to LIVE our story, not just read about it.
How cool is that?
When I laid down the burden of making everyone around me happy, I was freed to think more clearly. When I looked at what I have learned simply by being TS I realized this life has taught me more about people than I could have ever learned had I not been TS. I would never change that.
Being awake, seeing things for their beauty, seeing people for who they are inside and not passing judgement all came from the experiences I've had being TS. Many people will never know this joy, never see the inner beauty of another person, never know that no matter what happens outside, life comes from within.
If each and every person were thrust into our world for one month, how many would survive? How many would lose their sanity? How many would sink deep into depression? But once they went back you can be sure this world would be a different place. And I suspect that place would be one filled with warmth, love and joy.
Julie
I've been practicing Zazen meditation for several years, in addition to religious study. I've come to the conclusion that life is a game. Each of us are players in this game. The point of the game is to experience whatever we want to experience within the game. There are no winners, and no losers.
The only way to fail at the game is to not do the things you came here to do. Whether you came to play with gender, enjoy good food, help the needy, or jump out of airplanes...it doesn't matter. True enlightenment comes when you do the things you truly want to do.
Life is a game, and you make the rules.
Quote from: VeryGnawty on December 13, 2006, 09:20:48 AMLife is a game, and you make the rules.
Rule #1: When I snap my fingers, I'll become a natural-born female.... snap... snap.... snap...
Fine, lol. OK, revised:
Rule #1: After hormones, facial surgery and genital surgery I'll be as close to a natural born female as I can get.I can live with that ;)
Yes, life is... well... something alright. Director, actor and screenwriter all rolled into one big ball of delicious fun.
Quote from: Kate on December 13, 2006, 10:37:31 AMRule #1: When I snap my fingers, I'll become a natural-born female.... snap... snap.... snap...
If it were
that easy, then it wouldn't be any fun. ::)
Quote from: Julie Marie on December 10, 2006, 09:35:25 PM
If you know me you would never call me a Buddhist...
In its strictest sense Buddhism certainly isn't for everyone. But in a general sense I feel there's something everyone can adopt from Buddhism that will make their life better. It certainly has mine.
Julie
Interesting and thought provoking post. I like it. I started in Buddhism in the early 1970's, as with many then with Alan Watts, but left it to learn Taoism. It's almost an opposite approach and more helpful to me. It teaches answers to deep personal questions are found in looking outside of yourself, at the world in its infinite variety. It teaches to search there and answers come through your experience where you will know yourself and what is innately right for you. It's within you, you have to see to discover it.
It also helps in exploring my transistion by seeing the variety of people and experiences, and finding myself amidst the world, as one of many, but still mine and unique in my own way. It teaches me to find and see myself among the world of women. It almost goes full circle by looking out you come around to seeing yourself. And as a photographer it helps me there too. Photography is all about looking and seeing, and Taoism is the personal photography of life and existence.
Have a good holiday.
--Susan--
I like that if you're Buddhist you can be a Buddhist AND a Christian.
But, of course, if you're Christian (especially some of the Stern Father Christian denominations,) you can't also be Buddhist.
Put that in your Zen and smoke it...
Karen ;D ;D ;D
Oh yeah? Well here's some zen for you.
"As for the outside world, the artist is confronted by what he sees; but what he sees is primarily what he looks at."
- Andre Malraux
Quote from: Kate on December 11, 2006, 09:06:39 AM
Why does *everything* in this world seem to reflect everything else?
That's the way *it's* 'built' from the model. Infinite feedback loops within self-same loops. ^-^
Being the contrarian that I am, I am going to disagree slightly. One could say that the Buddhist mindset might lead one to believe that even though one is transsexual, the enlightened Buddhist would realize that transition is totally unnecessary, even silly, as the physical body is irrelevant. OTOH, there is a belief that if one screws up in their current go-round, they will be punished by coming back as a woman in the next life. That kinda goes against the grain, doesn't it?
Quote from: melissa90299 on August 06, 2007, 07:17:00 PM
Being the contrarian that I am, I am going to disagree slightly. One could say that the Buddhist mindset might lead one to believe that even though one is transsexual, the enlightened Buddhist would realize that transition is totally unnecessary, even silly, as the physical body is irrelevant.
Hi,
I've been a Buddhist for about 8 years and what you say was EXACTLY how I felt. Life is suffering and we need to simply understand that fact. Which is why I was miserable for so long and never did anything about it. I just (wrongly) tried to ignore who I was and that it was inconsistent with my physical body.
However, a little while ago I was talking to my Bhante and he said something that really resonated with me and it in part is why I'm taking my first steps to transition. I'll have to paraphrase because I can't remember how he said it in his Sri Lankan accent and grammar. ^_^
"... if you can, you should try to reduce the suffering of anyone or anything that is suffering... And that includes YOURSELF as well."
And that made a lot of sense to me. And I think I have a means to reduce (and possibly eliminate) my GID induced suffering. So I will. ^_^
Quotethe enlightened Buddhist would realize that transition is totally unnecessary, even silly
The truly enlightened Buddhist would realize that everything is silly, including enlightenment. I also think that desire (and the resulting pain thereof) is highly misunderstood. Just because you don't need to do something doesn't mean you shouldn't, just as the ability to do something doesn't mean you should.
Sitting around in some cave all day doesn't mean you are enlightened. Rejecting society doesn't mean you are enlightened. Rejection in itself is a form of attachment.
Transition doesn't really have any effect on enlightenment either way. Suffering doesn't follow from actions, although actions are often associated with suffering. But the real cause of suffering is state of mind only.
Why do you think the Buddha eventually changed his initial renouncement of materialism? It's because he realized the Middle Way, and that the material world is here for a reason.
You left out my preface "one could say" meaning I was merely bringing up a contrary point of view. I agree that Buddhism is relatively neutral when it comes to the issue of transition, that is more than can be said of the other major religions of the world.
Posted on: August 07, 2007, 12:23:41 PM
Quote from: VeryGnawty on August 07, 2007, 03:10:28 AM
Quotethe enlightened Buddhist would realize that transition is totally unnecessary, even silly
It's because he realized the Middle Way, and that the material world is here for a reason.
Which is?
Posted on: August 07, 2007, 12:25:00 PM
Quote from: VeryGnawty on August 07, 2007, 03:10:28 AM
Quotethe enlightened Buddhist would realize that transition is totally unnecessary, even silly
Transition doesn't really have any effect on enlightenment either way.
I would say that the quieting of the mind that comes from eliminating GID can help one on the path to enlightenment.
This thread has been VERY enlightening. Keep it up! I've never considered how enlightenment would affect one's need to transition. Thanks, everyone. This is wonderful.
I know that there are some good philosophies but I have my criticisms. Like for example Suffering is caused by desire. ??? do people desire to suffer?
Quote from: Blanche on August 08, 2007, 01:48:36 AM
I know that there are some good philosophies but I have my criticisms. Like for example Suffering is caused by desire. ??? do people desire to suffer?
No.
Most Westerners have a hard time understanding Buddhist teaching (Including me BTW) It took me about two years of exploration to finally start to understand. Here is an excellent source.
www.zencast.org
You can also download all the stuff on itunes.
Fascinating thread. I've also explored Buddhism at various times of my life, perhaps enough to even be JuBu (with pagan leanings) ;D. I've sometimes wondered, in regard to impermanence of the body, whether it's truly necessary for me to transition physically, or whether the truly important thing on this path was/is simply to realize and attempt to accept and understand this aspect of myself. Still trying to figure that one out, LOL. I think the g-ddess has quite the warped sense of humor, if you ask me.
Zythyra
I used to make a lot of money. I had a big new house. New vehicles. My own company. I was in a long term marriage. I had four good kids who did great in school and never got into trouble. I was a community leader and politicians visited me during election cycles. I coached little league football and was secretary of the league. I coached and mentored 10-12 year old kids. I played in a band with my sister, brother, wife and some good friends. I had the nicest PA system, the best guitars and amp. I guess you could say I had it all.
Not only did I not feel any fulfillment, I hated my life and I hated myself. There were so many people counting on me, I was totally paralyzed. My wife and family counted on me to provide for them and to care for them. My customers relied on me to solve their problems. My employees counted on me to provide them with stable employment, a safe working condition, and fair wages. Little league counted on me to not only coach my team, but to use my influence to get local corporations to support our league. My band members counted on me not only to learn my parts and be rehearsed, but also to buy and maintain the sound gear, as well as do all the bookings. My wife counted on me to run the business, bring in new work, bid jobs, collect accounts, design and build jobs as well as satisfy her sexual and emotional needs.
Coming out was in impossibility. It meant losing everything. Yeah, that same everything that was draining the life blood out of me, while not meeting any of my own needs. My life it seemed, was for everyone else's benefit. I was there to provide income and support for everyone else. I was so attached to everything, I had no chance to find happiness.
The economy where I lived relied on the Pacific Rim. In 1998 the financial crisis there caused a huge recession. That caused a major slow down where I lived. I hung on as long as I could, but by 2000 the phones stopped ringing and I had extended my company and personal credit as far as I could. I was forced to fold my business.
I moved back to LA and within a few months I had worked my way up and was again making almost a hundred grand a year. But two years later I got so ill I could no longer work. My marriage was on the rocks and we had already been living separate lives for a while. We rarely talked, had sex once in while, which I usually failed at anyway and whenever we went anywhere together, we just ended up fighting. I had long suspected she was having an affair, but I was now very certain and started preparing myself for a divorce.
In the end I had to let go of everything. I lost my company, my house, my new cars, my job, my wife, coaching, playing in a band and any hope that I might ever return to my former employment. Now I live in disability, drive a ten year old car, live in an apartment and the only commitment I have now, is taking care of my two kids who still live with me, and going to college.
All of the stuff that I was so attached to, that I thought meant so much, not only did not make me happy, but was a huge source of discontent. That is because it tied me to a life that I hated. There was no way I could ever be Elizabeth in that life. I had to let it all go to truly be free. I don't want a zillion people counting on me. I want to live my life how I choose. As myself, Elizabeth.
I am happier than I ever recall being. I feel a real sense of contentment most of time. $3000 magically appears in my bank account every month and I get another almost $4000 every semester for student aid. I have Medicare and my exwife pays for my kids insurance. I don't owe any money to anyone. I found a wonderful woman who loves me for who I am and I go to college where people are open minded and treat me with respect.
I had to let it all go to find happiness. I don't have much money for entertainment, but I go to concerts and there is always museums and the beach, which don't cost a lot. I spend a great deal of time reading and learning. I love to learn, just can't get enough. For the first time since I was a little kid, I am not fantasizing about killing myself to end the pain.
I love that line from Fight Club where he says "the things you own, end up owning you". That was sure true for me. My life was about supplying things, to everyone, but they never made me happy. What made me happy was getting to live my life as a women. That's all. I don't need anything else.
Love always,
Elizabeth
QuoteI've sometimes wondered, in regard to impermanence of the body, whether it's truly necessary for me to transition physically
Nothing is necessary. The only thing which has ever been necessary is what you deemed necessary. You could just as easily change nothing, as change everything. The question is, would you really want to?
On a related note, desire isn't what causes suffering. Attachment causes suffering. Desire simply provides a motive to do something. But attachment prevents you from doing anything else. The reality is that it doesn't matter what you do at all. That is enlightenment.
Quote from: VeryGnawty on August 12, 2007, 03:27:01 PM
QuoteI've sometimes wondered, in regard to impermanence of the body, whether it's truly necessary for me to transition physically
Nothing is necessary. The only thing which has ever been necessary is what you deemed necessary. You could just as easily change nothing, as change everything. The question is, would you really want to?
On a related note, desire isn't what causes suffering. Attachment causes suffering. Desire simply provides a motive to do something. But attachment prevents you from doing anything else. The reality is that it doesn't matter what you do at all. That is enlightenment.
You are splitting hairs here. Mere desire that is devoid of clinging and craving (atttachment) does not cause
dukha. But this is a distinction that might confuse a lot of people.
Quote from: melissa90299 on August 14, 2007, 08:58:55 AM
You are splitting hairs here.
If that's what is necessary for true knowledge, then I'm about to split a few more.
There is no true knowledge, you know that!
Quote from: melissa90299 on August 20, 2007, 01:11:59 AM
There is no true knowledge, you know that!
Yes, but there is an illusion of knowledge. And it's exciting to pretend and play make-believe. Which, in reality, is probably why we are all here in the first place. To make-believe our own illusions. It's just that most people have forgotten that they are just pretending, and instead take themselves dead serious. Hence, suffering.
Quote from: VeryGnawty on August 21, 2007, 12:51:04 AM
Quote from: melissa90299 on August 20, 2007, 01:11:59 AM
There is no true knowledge, you know that!
Yes, but there is an illusion of knowledge. And it's exciting to pretend and play make-believe. Which, in reality, is probably why we are all here in the first place. To make-believe our own illusions. It's just that most people have forgotten that they are just pretending, and instead take themselves dead serious. Hence, suffering.
Quote from: VeryGnawty on August 12, 2007, 03:27:01 PM
Nothing is necessary.
Nothing is essential. ;)
In the 20 or so months since I posted this thread I've done a lot of other reading. The basic idea still being, accept yourself and others for who you and they are and you will live a happier life. And I believe that. It's worked for me and has been at the core of enabling me to transition.
Like Elizabeth, I lost a lot. About all I have left now is work and I won't give that up because I'm so close to retirement. But little by little I m feeling there is hope that those who walked out of my life because I'm trans will return. As much as it hurt to lose them I was able to deal with it because I learned to accept things for what they are and I attached no further meaning to them.
But when it comes to accepting my male physical self and try to live the life as a male, well, I just can't seem to do that. I've thought this over hundreds of times and there seems to be no way I'll ever accept my physical self as it is. I need GRS and want BA. I may even pursue FFS. And I know when it's all done I will be immensely happier. There's no mind games I can play with myself that can take the place of having the surgeries. It's a fact I have accepted.
Wilh all the different belief systems out there I have never encountered one that will overcome the transsexual's desire to change physical gender. In fact I'd say many of them help the TS to pursue living their life in the way that makes them happiest even though it's such a social taboo. For me it was critical in allowing myself to transition. If I was still hanging on to my old beliefs I'd be a wreck by now because the inner battle would be raging more than ever.
Whatever beleif system one uses, as long as it results in inner peace and real happiness (or whatever goal they have in mind), it's the right belief system for that person. And we just have to accept that.
Julie
I am just adding myself to the list of Buddhists here.
I have a Soto Zen Practice.
Have a nice day everyone.
Quote from: Julie Marie on August 25, 2007, 11:16:05 AMThe basic idea still being, accept yourself and others for who you and they are and you will live a happier life.
This is important. This is where judgment and resentment enter the picture.
For example, let's say I have a friend. I may not personally like to do the things my friend does. I might call my friend stupid. This is not good nor bad, nor is it karma. It is just a fact, my friend really is stupid.
The enlightenment comes from recognizing that there is nothing wrong with stupid. Plenty of people do dumb stuff. It is a learning experience. What is important is knowing how to educate the friend and allowing him to make his own decisions, rather than force him to change. Because force is always done out of resentment/judgment, which is karma, rather than love (which is the only thing which doesn't cause suffering).
Many people make the mistake of trying to force someone to change their lifestyle, claiming that they love this person. It is only elitism. You think that your ideas are better. In reality, they probably
are better, but the forcing someone to change still causes suffering regardless of how much more efficient your lifestyle is than theirs.
QuoteBut when it comes to accepting my male physical self and try to live the life as a male, well, I just can't seem to do that. I've thought this over hundreds of times and there seems to be no way I'll ever accept my physical self as it is.
This is where the splitting of hairs comes in handy that I mentioned earlier. The only truth is for accepting the self as it is, and everyone else as they are. This is the self, the whole self, and nothing but the self.
For example, one may think that by accepting oneself as male, one may obtain peace and enlightenment. However, a decision such as this usually results from a lack of information on what the self is. If one tries to accept oneself as male, but doesn't really want to be male, this is still attachment. One is attached to the idea that one SHOULD accept oneself as male, or all the more the idea that one SHOULD NOT make a transition to female.
Anytime one says that one SHOULD do something, or NEEDS to do something, this is a clear sign of attachment. There is never a need, only a doing. One CAN be male, just as one CAN be female. But the choice is merely that: a choice. It has no weight or bearing attached to it, and no deliberation is necessary to make the choice, because the choice doesn't actually matter.
This is an example of being attached to the idea of detachment. One believes that one "needs" to do certain things to become more spiritual. True enlightenment comes when one realizes that one doesn't need to do anything, including quest for enlightenment. Only then, when one is free of attachment, can one make a rational choice about how to live one's life.
The real irony is that when such an enlightenment comes, physical transition will no longer matter (because one is detached) but most people would still choose it anyway (because they can).
This is why enlightenment is so hard to grasp. It is actually a paradox. You get what you want by forgetting that you want it. But few people are ever willing to forget, because they won't realize that their attachment to a result is the very thing preventing them from having it.
the things you own, end up owning you
Beyond brilliant that line, really. I always told my kids to watch their ABCs (Amusements, Books, and Companions) for that which they brought into their life would become their life.
I too was radically unhappy doing what I thought others expected of me, defining success by what they viewed as being successful. Fast cars, big expensive motorcycles, huge CD collection and a stereo of the gods with speakers so big the joke was I was going to be buried in them. After all, a professor of the history of technology at a huge engineering school ought to have great technological toys. Not until I walked away from all of that did I realize that the only thing that kept me going was that I could tour in the summer and live on a bus, work from sun-up to long into the night, crawl back to my bunk and relax. No meetings, no toys, no striving, no grades, just good hard work.
I like:
Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind: by Shunryu Suzuki
Quote from: tekla on January 21, 2008, 12:41:23 PMI like:
Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind: by Shunryu Suzuki
Excellent book.
I have enjoyed
Being Peace, Thich Nhat Hanh
He is most wonderful also. His lectures are a large source of comfort to me.
Quote from: tekla on January 21, 2008, 12:41:23 PM
I too was radically unhappy doing what I thought others expected of me, defining success by what they viewed as being successful. Fast cars, big expensive motorcycles, huge CD collection and a stereo of the gods with speakers so big the joke was I was going to be buried in them.
I was like that too. Even when I was a kid, the only material thing I really liked was food (I used to eat like a hog). I was never concerned much with careers or diplomas or possessions or money. In fact, the only reason I have money is because I hardly spend any.
I find a lot of great ideas in Buddhism and Jainism. Taoism in particular resonates with me. When I first started reading the Tao Te Ching, I thought it was the most sensible thing I had ever read.
When I first started reading the Tao Te Ching, I thought it was the most sensible thing I had ever read.
Most likely it is.