I decided to be seriousand tell almost all my loved ones, i told my sister yesterday she sorta understood, I told my girlfriend and she was very shocked we had a long talk and shes willing to be with me because she says she loves me and thats that. and i just told my mother, and almost started busting out tears, she didnt really understand why, she kept saying i look better as a guy, and why would i feel like it and such, and at the end she still feels like it, i told my sister that i almost started crying, then my sister told me that I should stay as a guy it would b better for you and vicki. Why can't she understand that I'm not a guy and she only sees me as one, because i grew up born as a guys body.
Give it time. Judging by the reactions you described, they certainly didn't expect anything like this. Just continue to be open and honest. If they have questions, try to answer them as best you can. In fact, you should encourage them to ask questions. Something like this is impossible for a happy cis-gendered person to understand because they've never been in your shoes. It can be frustrating, but try to be patient and reassure them about who you are and whatever steps you wish to take.
I hope the situation improves for you. Best of luck with your coming out. (:
Hi Mktwigg,
Once we come out to friends and family you have to expect a range of response. Your's seem quite good actually :-*. It's natural for your Mum, sister and girlfriend to have a negative reaction, particularly if you haven't 'primed' them. I'm considerably older than you, but when I was a teen my sister knew totally that I preferred dressing and going out as female. She accepted and helped me. My Mum thought I was a pervert, a child molester at best for some reason. Still loved her though ::). When I married my wife new all about Cindy and accepted her as part and parcel of our relationship. Now as I am walking in the world (mainly) as Cindy I really don't care what people think.
But it takes time, trust and openness. You may well find that your girl friend has the worst time. She may try and accept the situation but in reality unless she has lesbian tendencies then having another woman as a 'boyfriend' will be too much. I have some very close relationships with women who were physically and emotionally interested in me when I presented as male. I still have those relationships, but they have been very clearly stated by my two friends." I love you as a person and will always be a friend, but I'm not lesbian so will never be interested in a physical relationship". I was little taken aback as I had never wanted, instigated or suggested a physical relationship with either ::). But maybe they were laying the ground rules.
One of the weird things about being transgendered is the labels and signs people wish to use. The sort of conversations that come up to are: So you are transgendered, do you like guys or girls? Guys, so you are Gay. No I'm female and I like guys, that makes me straight. But ::)
You have to also decide where from here? Are you seeing a therapist? Are you living as female? Are you wanting or thinking of GRS, starting with hormones, then sex reassignment surgery, maybe breast enhancement and possibly facial surgery if needed. Are you wanting to live full time female. Not a pretend female (sorry to anyone who feels insulted please take in context) but a normal woman in society. Working and living as any other normal woman does. Being accepted by society and treated by society as a woman.
Hugs and Kisses
Keep posting
That is why this site exists
Cindy