Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Female to male transsexual talk (FTM) => Topic started by: tori319 on October 03, 2010, 01:07:15 AM

Title: Does it bother you?
Post by: tori319 on October 03, 2010, 01:07:15 AM
I was talking to my friend(who I'm not out to yet) the other day about trans people, when we discussed trans guys she didn't even know they existed.When I mentioned them she said that they were not transsexual and then said that she didn't know what to call them.My question to you guys is do you like not having people know about you or does it bother you?
Title: Re: Does it bother you?
Post by: Meepit on October 03, 2010, 01:10:58 AM
I prefer(red) it. The past tense is used in brackets because since Degrassi and other TV shows, FTM's have gone mainstream :(. I hate it being more known now because all the stereotypes come with it. People tend to assume things about you without even knowing a shred of your past. Like before, at the worst, I'd just be seen as a guy-ish girl and things would be left at that. But now, people'll probably pick up on the FTM-ness and prod further. Overall, I preferred being more "underground".
Title: Re: Does it bother you?
Post by: Teknoir on October 03, 2010, 02:37:41 AM
I prefer that most people don't know we exist. When they know we exist, they'll start looking for us. Then it makes passing consistently a hell of a lot harder.

We are starting to go mainstream (sadly), but the majority of people that do know we exist also have a lot of misconceptions. For instance, I've heard some people say that even after "male hormones" they can't grow facial hair, and they still look female :laugh:

I think there's a balance that could be struck. We're high enough profile on the net that those with gender issues can find us, but we still manage to stay out of the mainstream media. I'd be happy for things to stay that way... but that doesn't seem to be what's happening. We're getting way more media attention than I'm comfortable with these days. It's starting to make me twitchy. I go around unquestioned now, I don't want that to change.
Title: Re: Does it bother you?
Post by: sneakersjay on October 03, 2010, 07:09:50 AM
On the one hand, if more people knew they (we) existed, I might have discovered transitioning a heck of a lot sooner (though in reality the timing was perfect).

On the other hand, with people not knowing we exist, I can live relatively stealth easier.


Jay
Title: Re: Does it bother you?
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on October 03, 2010, 10:27:41 AM
Quote from: tori319 on October 03, 2010, 01:07:15 AMWhen I mentioned them she said that they were not transsexual and then said that she didn't know what to call them.
Why would they not be transsexuals?

Quote from: tori319 on October 03, 2010, 01:07:15 AMMy question to you guys is do you like not having people know about you or does it bother you?
I think many people know about us. I just asked a friend of mine if he knew about FTMs before I told him and his reply was "Yes, I just didn't really think about it". What does bother me are bad stereotypes people might make up about FTMs, and MTFs as well.

Quote from: Meepit on October 03, 2010, 01:10:58 AMsince Degrassi and other TV shows, FTM's have gone mainstream :(.
I'm not sure if this is true, I've never seen Degrassi and assume a lot of people haven't.
Title: Re: Does it bother you?
Post by: aydan_boy on October 03, 2010, 10:31:48 AM
I'm glad that to a lot of people we are non-existant : :) It helps with passing to a point. At least when they see a relatively short femme looking guy the first thing on there mind won't be "FTM transexual".
Title: Re: Does it bother you?
Post by: tori319 on October 03, 2010, 01:02:14 PM
Quote from: Hurtfulsplash on October 03, 2010, 10:27:41 AM
Why would they not be transsexuals?
I guess in her mind a transsexual is just a drag queenish chick with a dick.I'm hoping to change her mind about that once I come out to her.
Title: Re: Does it bother you?
Post by: Radar on October 03, 2010, 07:28:25 PM
It's a bit of a double-edged sword. On one hand people can become more knowledgable about it and learn truths from documentaries, reputable talk shows and health shows. On the other hand people can be exposed to stereotyping and bad press. So I guess it depends on the person, what shows they watch/what they read and their own conceptions.

At any rate I hope people who know I'm trans will see me and hopefully have a more positive view of it by knowing me.
Title: Re: Does it bother you?
Post by: Elijah3291 on October 03, 2010, 07:31:49 PM
I would rather people not know about us.. makes it easier to blend in and be just seen as a guy, rather then "the guy who useeeeed to be a girl.  or "the girl who wants to be a guy"