Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Female to male transsexual talk (FTM) => Topic started by: Kentrie on October 24, 2010, 12:49:39 AM

Title: Sex Drive?
Post by: Kentrie on October 24, 2010, 12:49:39 AM
I'm 16 years old and I have no sex drive at all. I never get horny, ever. Does anyone know what could be causing this?
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Silver on October 24, 2010, 01:20:35 AM
You just have a really low sex drive. Maybe you're asexual.

Hey, it'll save you a good deal of frustration and you won't be distracted by it so that's good.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Samson99 on October 24, 2010, 01:29:33 AM
My sex drive fluctuates a lot. Most of the time, I have no sex drive, much to the dismay of my boyfriend. And other times, I have a huge sex drive, and I can't really explain or figure out why. The reason why I think I may personally have a low sex drive is because I am not comfortable with my female body. I think if I had the body I want, my sex drive would spike and be consistent.

Could just be me, because you may be cool with your body, in which case, yes, it may just be a hormonal thing. Not all people have significant sex drives, and that's okay. It may change over time, or with different partners. You never know.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Sharky on October 24, 2010, 01:43:28 AM
Theres a lot of things that can affect you sex drive. If you don't get it back soon I would ask a doctor about it.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Tad on October 24, 2010, 02:02:28 AM
I had no sex drive til I was almost 18 despite the fact that I hit puberty full out at like age 11. Now it's full force sex drive RAWRRRRR!
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: springsprong on October 24, 2010, 02:56:26 AM
My sex drive also fluctuates a lot, but on average, it's pretty high, I think. To the point where I sometimes I wish it was lower because it's so damn distracting to be at work or something and have a stray sexy thought that turns you on. My sex drive makes me want T a little less because if it increases, I'm going to have a hard time getting things done.

That being said, having a low sex drive doesn't necessarily mean that there's anything wrong with you. A low sex drive is a natural state for some people. Don't let anyone pressure you into doing anything you don't want to, or guilt trip you into doing something because you feel like you "should" have a sex drive.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: kyril on October 24, 2010, 03:20:19 AM
I always had an extremely high sex drive. I've known people who have almost none, and others who have a sex drive but it's only "awakened" in a relationship with someone they really care about, and others whose sex drive is mainly a drive for intimacy and to pleasure their partner.

My husband fits all three descriptions - fairly low sex drive that's nonexistent outside committed relationships, doesn't masturbate and has essentially zero interest in his own orgasms. That's supposedly uncommon among men, but it's reasonably common among women, and since we know sex drive is linked to hormone levels, it's probably not at all uncommon among pre-T trans guys either. Especially with the dysphoria issue.

Basically, it's not a big deal. You might develop more interest when you get older. You might develop an interest when you get into a serious enough relationship. You might find that you start getting spontaneously horny when you start T. Or you might never care very much about sex, and that's fine.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: kyril on October 24, 2010, 03:33:13 AM
Quote from: springsprong on October 24, 2010, 02:56:26 AM
My sex drive also fluctuates a lot, but on average, it's pretty high, I think. To the point where I sometimes I wish it was lower because it's so damn distracting to be at work or something and have a stray sexy thought that turns you on. My sex drive makes me want T a little less because if it increases, I'm going to have a hard time getting things done.
T doesn't universally make you constantly hornier. My experience has been that my sex drive went from a constant "always on" state to isolated, focused, but stronger episodes of "needing" to get off. I'm actually less distracted by it now than I used to be, as long as I take care of it regularly...it'll be largely out of my mind for hours at a time, unless something triggers it.

(still haven't learned a good way to deal with "blue balls" when something turns me on and I don't have the opportunity to relieve it at the time)
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: springsprong on October 24, 2010, 08:33:05 AM
That's good to know, Kyril. I'd only really talked to FTM's who had little sex drive before T and had it increase.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Alexmakenoise on October 24, 2010, 09:42:23 AM
I used to have a really high sex drive.  It was a constant distraction and caused me a lot of frustration.  I was actually looking into seeing an endocrinologist about it.  Then I accidentally got pregnant, miscarried, and after that, my sex drive was gone.  It comes back when I'm in a relationship sort of situation, but otherwise, I never think about sex.  I do wonder if there's something wrong with my hormones because it was such a drastic change, but I kind of don't care because I'm a lot happier without a sex drive.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Carson on October 24, 2010, 04:37:38 PM
I never had a sex drive until probably like 17 or until I had someone I actually wanted to do things with. But now that I've experienced a lot and I'm older I have an extremely high sex drive. And T increased it but it also could just be that it made me more aware of it.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: jet3 on October 24, 2010, 05:47:51 PM
It could be your age man! I didnt have a sex drive at all until i was about 18 but even then it wasnt a big sex drive. It gradually increased over the next few years. Then once i got on T, it went through the roof!
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Kentrie on October 24, 2010, 06:20:20 PM
When I first started puberty I would get so horny it hurt but when I got deeply depressed I didn't care about anything and I'm still very depressed and I can not get horny at all no matter what I think about.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Elijah3291 on October 24, 2010, 06:23:40 PM
dude, i didnt even know about being horny untill I was 16 lol.  You are ok, it may be your hormones.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Shang on October 24, 2010, 06:31:57 PM
I have almost no sex drive.  I have had sex, but never any real urge to have it. 

You could be asexual, or it could be hormone imbalance, or you're just not to that point in time where you want to have sex.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Carson on October 24, 2010, 10:21:10 PM
Quote from: Kentrie on October 24, 2010, 06:20:20 PM
When I first started puberty I would get so horny it hurt but when I got deeply depressed I didn't care about anything and I'm still very depressed and I can not get horny at all no matter what I think about.

well depression can do that a lot of the time so it might not necessarily be your hormones.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: kyril on October 24, 2010, 11:46:09 PM
Quote from: Kentrie on October 24, 2010, 06:20:20 PM
When I first started puberty I would get so horny it hurt but when I got deeply depressed I didn't care about anything and I'm still very depressed and I can not get horny at all no matter what I think about.
Depression can kill your sex drive. When the depression lifts, it should come back. Have you taken any steps to work on treating your depression?
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Nygeel on October 25, 2010, 01:46:14 AM
I didn't start having a real sex drive until a week ago and I'm 23. It popped out of nowhere.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Jaxen on October 25, 2010, 02:06:10 AM
Quote from: Kentrie on October 24, 2010, 06:20:20 PM
When I first started puberty I would get so horny it hurt but when I got deeply depressed I didn't care about anything and I'm still very depressed and I can not get horny at all no matter what I think about.

If you're taking any sort of anti-depressants they can kill your libido too.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Kentrie on October 25, 2010, 09:15:38 PM
I take anti-depressants.
Title: Re: Sex Drive?
Post by: Silver on October 26, 2010, 01:57:58 AM
I think we have our answer then.

Enjoy not being pestered by sexual thoughts at inappropriate times then lol. Or maybe you don't like having a nonexistent drive, I don't really know.