First off, I am not for one second advocating the idea that ->-bleeped-<- is an addiction in the strictest form, or that everyone who identifies as transgender is an addict.
However, after spending some time researching on Google, I've found that there are a lot of evidence to support the idea that being transgendered COULD be construed as an addiction in certain circumstances. Compulsive behaviour, depression, withdrawal, escapism, a willingness to destroy the life one's built up in order to get their "fix," and inability to quit would be the cross-over traits.
I'm starting to wonder if being transgendered was just the first in a long line of addictions. Research on addictive personality, coupled with the fact that I smoke, smoke pot, and have a few interesting bedroom practices has led me to conclude that I for certain have one. Lack of motivation, inability to value society's standards of success, self-alienation, propensity for non-comformity, inability to handle even the slightest stress.
What are your guys' thoughts on this? I've just moved in with my parents until I get back on my feet, and I'm in a stage of re-evaluation on my life. Again, I re-iterate that I do not think that ->-bleeped-<- is an addiction, merely that my particular brand may be.
Just as Ani DeFranco says that every tool is a weapon if you hold it right, anything can be addictive if you have an addictive personality.
Excuse me, but I have none of the traits you mentioned, nor do I have any addictions outside of caffeine. Please do not put me into your box as result of your "research".
COULD be construed as an addiction in certain circumstances.
That's hardly putting anyone into a box. It's stated in the beginning that's it's not everyone. It seems like Jester is only asking a question about Jester. There is a whole lot of 'I' in what Jester wrote, so it's hard to see where he's talking about anyone else.
This is why it is important to diagnose and fix other mental health related issues before one transitions - co-morbidity might be causing or exacerbating the transgender element.
While GID could cause you to act in ways similar to how one acts as an addict...
Quote from: Jester on December 20, 2010, 10:26:05 AM
Compulsive behaviour, depression, withdrawal, escapism, a willingness to destroy the life one's built up in order to get their "fix," and inability to quit would be the cross-over traits.
... I don't think that in itself implies that ->-bleeped-<- is an addiction. There seems to be a flaw in the logic here.
If you are addicted to alcohol and/or other drugs, it isn't the depression, withdrawal, etc. that causes the addiction. Similarly, GID may make you depressed and withdraw, but that doesn't mean that alcohol addiction and GID are similar. The outcomes may be similar, but the causes are very different.
JMHO.
- Kate
Interesting thread. Yes, I think just about anything can be an addiction, and there are plenty of things that could manifest as GID, so of course ->-bleeped-<- could be an addiction in some cases. I'm glad you're thinking this through so thoroughly instead of making assumptions and rushing in. I don't think GID is always a simple case of your mind being a different gender than your body. People are more complicated than that.
I think that in some cases, crossdressing has addiction-like qualities.
However, addiction in general is only addiction if the activity you're addicted to has an overall negative impact on your life, and more to the point, that you want to stop but are unable too. For me at least, transition has had a positive impact on my life.
It also has to be a clear 'activity'.
What is the activity that parallels a fix? A Drink? Etc...
If you broaden the criteria enough, you could make anything into an addiction. You could argue that some people are addicted to saving money. That some are addicted to their job, etc.
Quote from: CaitJ on December 20, 2010, 12:56:06 PM
This is why it is important to diagnose and fix other mental health related issues before one transitions - co-morbidity might be causing or exacerbating the transgender element.
I don't agree with that at all.
If i had done that, I'd still be waiting to transition, lol. And it's so much interconnected, I don't feel you could handle it on a one symptom at a time only basis anyhow.
Quote from: Asfsd4214 on December 20, 2010, 11:58:10 PM
I don't agree with that at all.
If i had done that, I'd still be waiting to transition, lol. And it's so much interconnected, I don't feel you could handle it on a one symptom at a time only basis anyhow.
Sure, though any psychologist worth their degree wouldn't write you a surgery letter while you had existing mental conditions.
Quote from: CaitJ on December 21, 2010, 12:47:13 AM
Sure, though any psychologist worth their degree wouldn't write you a surgery letter while you had existing mental conditions.
I can be pretty persuasive. ;D
Quote from: Asfsd4214 on December 21, 2010, 01:05:25 AM
I can be pretty persuasive. ;D
Well, so long as you're 100% certain that your GID isn't caused by any of your other issues, then more power to you.
Although pulling to wool on psychs is hardly rocket surgery; just look at some of the tragic people who managed to get through the system, then realised it was all wrong and detransitioned :-\
But then you have to think about what could be a side effect of GID. GID could be the cause and say OCD could be a side effect of having to deal with the wrong body day in and day out. It's just hard to tell what the cause and what the effect is. You don't know if they are separate entities or if they are linked.
For instance I don't think I need to cure my social anxiety before I transition because I believe either they are completely separate problems or that social anxiety is caused by GID. Either way it could take my entire life to work through social anxiety problems. As of now there isn't really a cure that I know, therapy is about as good as it gets. So I don't think I need to become an extroverted, social adept person to transition. Since I am transitioning for myself and not for others.
Just my two cents :).
What is the activity that parallels a fix?
Sexual release in some form (and there are lots of forms).
Quote from: tekla on December 21, 2010, 03:05:43 AM
What is the activity that parallels a fix?
Sexual release in some form (and there are lots of forms).
What if you don't have any sexual releases related to your gender issues?
What I wonder is if: Could some of the attitudes on this and various web sites be contributing to intensified dysforic feelings? I think it is interesting that similar claims are made for anorexia sites,
"A new study published by the American Journal of Public Health looked at 180 of these pro-ana and pro-mia (sites promoting bulimia nervosa) web sites and found 83 percent of them offered advice on both how to start an eating disorder and/or how to continue the progression of anorexia, bulimia, or other eating and exercise disorders. Dr. Dennis shares the frustration of many in the eating disorder treatment community who wish more could be done to stop these harmful messages from reaching vulnerable girls, boys, women and men."
Note that anorexia is another "body image" item. I can not help but notice that many of the responses here seem to promote the go faster, don't listen to medical professionals, all shrinks are crazy, ignorant quacks, etc. etc. Blanchard is pathological. Dump your wife, kids, job, house, everything and become---what exactly? Don't get me wrong, I am trans. I support transition for the right people, for the right reasons. I have always suggested that people take the time to explore what they really need, not what some disembodied voice on some web site says. Yet we are singularly vulnerable to those voices because we have no acceptable pathways in our (mostly) western culture. People in India have an acceptable path - Hajiras.
I think that Anorexia as well as ->-bleeped-<- can stimulate production of certain brain chemicals that can be addictive. Some of those drugs are as strong as heroin. Too much uncritical support can feed those chemical releases as well. I suspect that my responses to inquires, which often counsel caution, critical introspection, and professional support are met with suspicion and perhaps even laughter at my old fogeyism. Be that as it may. I believe that transitioning is a serious, expensive, life altering thing. For some it is the absolutely correct course. For some, less drastic measures can suffice. You would be hard pressed to find too many on this, or other trans sites pushing for the less drastic measure solutions though.
Cindy,
I appreciate your post and agree with it to some extent. Susan's is the only trans site I participate in so I have no basis to judge others, but I believe there are plenty of posts here saying to be careful, think this over, each path is different, get help, etc. Support and promotion are different, but some may confuse one with the other. I don't know any way around that.
I think that every one of us humans has a tendency to want others to find the golden path that we have discovered, whether it be transition, politics, religion, eating habits, fitness, etc. But each of us is different. What worked for me may not work for you because your needs are different and/or your situation is different.
DO NOT LET ANYONE PUSH YOU ONTO THE WRONG PATH. It may be exciting to join a community of transitioners, but that doesn't mean you need to transition. I know that transition and surgery were right for me – I can feel the difference, my (cis) friends agree, and my therapist agrees – but that doesn't mean that it is right for you. Transition affects every aspect of your life – even more so than a career choice or marriage or having children. Do regular reality checks along the way to be certain you are doing what is right for you.
Back to the thread: We can get carried away with the idea of transition, but I still don't think that is the same as an addiction.
- Kate
I haven't disagreed with anyone so far. I wasn't asking a yes or no question, so yeah.
The reason I'm so concerned with this issue is that I came to the thought on my own and then researched it on the internet, and I found results. One woman who had become a psychologist using analytic logic to compare her genetic father's GID to a life of unacceptance and early life sexual abuse. Another was a guy who self-diagnosed his cross-dressing as an addiction because he wanted to stop for his family and his friends and his job, but he couldn't. He took a generic 12 step group therapy, and claims that it worked.
I wouldn't presume to say that any of this was true for any person (especially the first example, since it's a third party analysis.)
I think the answer I should take away from this is that I need to clean up a bit before I can continue thinking about this. Caffeine was my only crutch when I first started down this path, but man, university. Am I right?
My parents still believe that this is what happened to me. That the internet DID THIS TO ME. Sigh.
If that were the case then why am I happier than I've ever been in my whole life?
And they say I was never feminine growing up. More like they don't want to remember all the many ways I was feminine heh.
I certainly believe that it is the right course for many. I don't think the internet can "do it to you", if there isn't already some predisposition. My point is simply that social affirmations are a powerful reinforcement that is accompanied by strong chemical releases in the "feel good" areas of the brain. I am constantly trying to get the managers here to use "compliments" as a reinforcing technique with the troops. You get the actions that are rewarded, whether the reward is monetary or a hit of oxytocin from your brain synapse. The managers here are almost all dollar driven and think it is silly to complement someone. They suspect it has to do with my "differentness," The management literature has extensive studies, tests, experiments etc. that pretty much conclusively demonstrate it. This reinforcement, IMHO, can perhaps push someone further, faster than perhaps they should go. That stopping or recharging is "letting down my friends." "what will they say if I have to reset the counter?" This is powerful stuff, this social affirmation. For good or bad. I am merely trying to point this out while emphasizing the true chemical nature of it. Perhaps I am most concerned with the number of those I suspect are very young.
When I went to my therapist to explain my first experiences with E, she said that I sounded like people who came to her having there first experiences with illicit drugs. Then I had this same question for my self.
Quote from: Moku on December 23, 2010, 05:10:36 PM
When I went to my therapist to explain my first experiences with E, she said that I sounded like people who came to her having there first experiences with illicit drugs. Then I had this same question for my self.
I've had the same reaction to reading a really good book.
Books are like drugs! BURN THEM!
Quote from: CaitJ on December 23, 2010, 05:33:55 PM
Books are like drugs! BURN THEM!
The first time I read Brian Jacques, I think I had a braingasm.
Yet isn't there is a real danger from some people transitioning and believing that more is better? I have heard that some go to the doc, get prescribed, then still go on line and order overseas. Reading too many books may stain your eyes, but too much E, P, or AA's has been proven to do serious harm in women on menopause doses. Perhaps that is what the therapist was alluding to? I know when I am at the end of my injection cycle when I start getting really bitchy. Isn't that a symptom of drug withdrawal? So it seems to me that there is, perhaps, a grain of truth to the statement. I certainly don't think that it is cause for not using appropriate amounts, under a drs. care, but it could be a cautionary tale.
I'm high on information and addicted to life :D
I think that the addiction analogy is more that we get caught up in the whole business of transition, from coming out to surgery. We can bury ourselves in it and let it take over our lives, or we can work through it while maintaining other aspects of our lives - work, relationships, educaiton, etc.
I think that you can get addicted to cross-dressing. I got close to that point a few times. The dressing became so important that I was in danger of losing all sense, letting it take over my life regardless of my work or relationships. That's when I knew I was in trouble and needed to do something more than just cross-dress.
Transition takes a lot of emotional energy and can affect every aspect of your life. If you can maintain control of your transiton, then I don't think that the addiction metaphor works. But if you are no longer in control of the process - that is, the process is driving you rather than the other way around - then perhaps a therapist might liken it to an addiciton.
- Kate
I struggled with being in this horrid body for 37 years there is no way it was an addiction for me. I have had my problems with illicit drug addiction including speed, cocaine and pot and this is one of the issues my therapist has taken me through to make sure i understood for myself that she did not believe i was in any way addicted to ->-bleeped-<-. We also went through the escapism bit as well.
But there were key things she noted that strongly suggested that i was just trans gender. So look into these things by all means but don't over intellectualize them. That path has no end. You will always manage to find a way to extend it and find a way to rationalize this extension. If you are unable to accept who you are then maybe who you are isnt who you think you are.
She ended with... these things that you are worrying about are really a very rare occurrence ie that a person would become addicted to ->-bleeped-<- or you use it as a way purely of escape. She quoted the statistics to me at the time and yes they were very very low. I dont recall the numbers but i will try and remember to get them on my next visit.
As for the bedroom antics this was another worry for myself as well as i seemed to enjoy sex so much more when my wife treated me as a woman. Barb had some input there as well.... she said the fact that my wife accepted me whole heartedly as a woman added to the experience in a similar way that the acceptance of my friends and family has made me altogether alot happier.
i am me and i am she i am so happy to be she. I hope i made at least some sense here and didnt just babble like i am apt to do