Avatars are funny things. I have really enjoyed seeing all the new and old avatars. Watching them change as the person progresses in there transition. Or just change because the person feels more comfortable with themselves.
The avatar that I have posted is the one I put up first. ( back at the beginning of October)I was so excited to have enough posts and be allowed to post an avatar. I went out with Patty to take some pictures just for that reason. At the time I was still presenting as male and I was too shy to post one of just myself, so I included Patty. (she has always been me security blanket)
It's funny because, we went out to take pictures. We must have taken fifty. When we got back home I was really let down. I was hoping that there would be at least one that was show me a little feminine. The best I could do was the one I posted. I felt so bad about it after a day or so I removed it. Then I re-posted it and just accepted it. I changed it to another, still not very feminine.
After a while it was time to go out in the real world and present female. After I did that my confidence changed, for the best. The added confidence helped not only in presenting female but it also showed up in photos.
The first attempt at picture taking was not so successful, fifty photos and not one I thought was acceptable. After the second , third and fourth attempts the ratio, acceptable to not acceptable became much better. Now when we take photos, like everyone feels, there are good and bad ones.
Now I know some of the changes can be attributed to my being on hrt after all, my first avatar was at the beginning of October so only a little over two months pasted before I posted the latest one. Allot of it has to do with confidence. Confidence I would have never experienced if I had not pushed myself and got out of my comfort zone.
I understand and respect a persons need for privacy, but if you are new here , or not, and you feel unsure about posting an avatar. Remember we all love you here at Susan's. We don't care how far along you or are not, in your transition. Your expression of confidence will only help others to express theirs. I am not trying to convince the people for one reason or another that chose to not post an avatar. I am only trying to encourage those that lack the confidence to express themselves, to do so. At the very least we will be able to place beautiful smile to the wonderful comments that you leave. To the ftm who prefer not to smile (your such guys) show us that austere look or maybe just a glimpse of those ever expanding biceps
First Avatar(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi812.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fzz47%2Fpscore%2FSeptember20100358x11.jpg&hash=216dc01e6f33a742cf0dadc35964ee265eb2d955)
Second avatar
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi812.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fzz47%2Fpscore%2Fsusans2nd.jpg&hash=61e9d741f8ea0512c182268779f183e9c47f8b1e)
Third avatar
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi812.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fzz47%2Fpscore%2Fsusans3rd.jpg&hash=5e6cfd856221308fa1b8e908539319acd83743a7)
Forth Avatar
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi812.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fzz47%2Fpscore%2Fsusans4th.jpg&hash=3d81dbc7f80bc19a40132aad985dc199e63f2c43)
Most recent Avatar
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi812.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fzz47%2Fpscore%2Fsusans5th.jpg&hash=98ae7d15dd9a9ff44a31f9540a3f2bcb14f70cbc)
Lots of love and a very merry Christmas to all, Roxy
I agree, Roxy, that the avatars can track our progress not just in looks but in confidence and assurance. I've had a few that I posted for a few hours and then reverted to a previous one or even a file picture of Kate Hepburn (my first avatar).
I looked for an early one to post here but then realized that I'd lost almost all of my pictures from my first six months of transition in a computer crash. But here's one from early on. (I was standing with my sister. I had probably been on HRT and full time for about six months.)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fvagabird.smugmug.com%2FOther%2FKate%2FMarty-and-Kate-c%2F1136943499_ghBZs-S.jpg&hash=8efdb4b4e8915fb5b8bbb610c2c339ac6e9c6ffc)
And here is probably my favorite one, from 11 months. I don't look like that anymore, so I don't use it.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fvagabird.smugmug.com%2FOther%2FKate%2F11-months-cc%2F819202837_Bq25o-S.jpg&hash=f2741dd7a9233b1beecd9457933c5d5079a3dc46)
- Kate
You are going great Roxy. It is fun some times to look back.
2008
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi397.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fpp59%2FJanet_Lynn_54%2Fonelook.jpg&hash=e81ee03d44ad2ff7cde28217e580faa07ea61bfa)
Sept 2008
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi397.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fpp59%2FJanet_Lynn_54%2FBeforeCourt002.jpg&hash=d26eae45fa837e8a5df0ccf987eb4c8125231266)
2009
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi397.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fpp59%2FJanet_Lynn_54%2F100_4455.jpg&hash=6ff5b52868765c1547364547d4c4a387af2646d6)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi397.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fpp59%2FJanet_Lynn_54%2F100_4411.jpg&hash=21765ac637e94540bb0a0a9dd9d87376585e9f20)
2010
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi397.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fpp59%2FJanet_Lynn_54%2F0022.jpg&hash=658a9afc7090c77298bffd6af7afd1434b142a39)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi397.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fpp59%2FJanet_Lynn_54%2FAvatar.png&hash=094e14372685ee5b76c5318f348a0b121c736350)
Quote from: Erocse on December 25, 2010, 12:12:01 PM
When we got back home I was really let down. I was hoping that there would be at least one that was show me a little feminine.
I think you're being a little hard on yourself really. The picture has you next to Patty.
Now imagine if the captain of your school football team wanted to post a picture making him look really tough. And he posed next to Mike Tyson?
Ercose, I am pretty certain most here will agree with me, you look great and are even better. But Patty has several years head start and some not unfavourable genetics.
Hope this came out the way I wanted it to.
I'm constantly surprised by how much i change between avatars...often within a week. hehe
Wow, when i look at those pictures, is see hope for myself. Thank you all.
I will do my best to pluck up my courage and post an avatar soon.
Hmm sure I know what you mean early on or pre-transition I'd need to take like 20 or so photos and I'd only keep one of them as it would make me look female the others would look like shots of an androgynous male. Now it's not nearly so hard :) I change my avatar wayy too much lol so heres a selection of them.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fv63%2FDarkphantom%2Fonlyme-1.jpg&hash=1d5abfa7d8b40c0f3d8bd55be6d7c28ff864136b) Pink hair! pre-transition. It took alot of photos to get this one I didn't look very female at all at that stage.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fv63%2FDarkphantom%2Fimage_sb_1.jpg&hash=17393c00cb8e36d733e83209025fc6e03ebe7952) 1 month HRT still living as male completely notice the blonde from the pink hair :P
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fv63%2FDarkphantom%2F3mo2.jpg&hash=6fdd7b0df8ed14cdf7e6927145250709728a179a) 3months HRT People starting to get suspicious that somthing was happening to me the period in which I came out to everyone, drifting more into part time living.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fv63%2FDarkphantom%2F6monMeX4.jpg&hash=3bd50bbe7099f5c13bf293c8829dbf3031c602e0) 6months HRT Summer days Living part time at this stage getting electrolysis my voice starting to become properly established but still unstable considering whether I keep going with the full transition or continue living part time setting further plans that I'd skipped with prior urgency I was read as gawky and androgynous.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fv63%2FDarkphantom%2Fnewhair2.jpg&hash=9a71da2e97b04fbea6d4309ab9742573a185a75e) 8/9months the move into full-time living. big push of effort on presentation here sorting out my eyebrows getting loads of electro towards autumn and of course the appearance of the fringe (Bangs) Name change and seeing shrinks ect. Begin read alot more as female by strangers enjoying myself and the privileges my journey has brought me thus far.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fv63%2FDarkphantom%2FAlicepants.jpg&hash=ef238db22669a90a005f0e1596df82eb957f125b) recent 11months Trying out different styles cautiously figuring out how feminine I'm comfortable begin, Name change nearly fully processed arguing with various people who don't use my new name. Struggling to balance various heavy drains on resources Transition/University/Employment
Hi Roxy
I think most people will have the same problem, when you look at a photo of yourselve you can only see the bad things ( at least I do) but other people have another perspective and they won't see the things you'll see.
In my opinion you and Patty look great, absolutely great.
and what about the avatars, well i changed mine one because of a more recently one, I don't making progress anymore, it's a matter of fact I'm going down hill because I'm getting older,(lol) but that isn't sad cuz i still love my life and enjoying it.
But I love to see that you people are making progress and look more pretty every time
love
annette
I can't post because I am on my iPod...but my avatar picture is me!
Roxy, Janet, Pebbles, and K8 You all look incredible! Confidence can make such a difference. Well, I guess I'll add my pics too. I don't post pictures too often for fear of where they may end up but occasionally I do and for this thread I will
Here's what I remember being my first avatar, I don't quite remember.
My current avatar is the most recent just taken today :)
Edit: Removed picture
Quote from: annette on December 25, 2010, 05:12:10 PM
Hi Roxy
I think most people will have the same problem, when you look at a photo of yourselve you can only see the bad things ( at least I do) but other people have another perspective and they won't see the things you'll see.
In my opinion you and Patty look great, absolutely great.
and what about the avatars, well i changed mine one because of a more recently one, I don't making progress anymore, it's a matter of fact I'm going down hill because I'm getting older,(lol) but that isn't sad cuz i still love my life and enjoying it.
But I love to see that you people are making progress and look more pretty every time
love
annette
Annette, your new avatar looks great!!! But I feel the same. We all are getting older. When I see a picture of myself I see all the bad things. They just jump out at you sometimes. The big chin, strong jaw line, brow bossing and the list goes on. I agree completely with you "I love life," too . It is such a vast improvement over the one I was living. It makes it all worth it.
Pebbles you look great. I love to see your new avatars. The changes are amazing. I see true happiest in the last one.
Janet and Kate you are always amazing and such great roll models.
Helena , you are a cutie. It's great to see the changes.
Alex201, that is a cool avatar
And Michael, All I could say is "holy sheep ->-bleeped-<-" you look awesome !!
Hugs, Roxy
Those are awesome ,and hopeful, changes in this topic. Yeah I do love the avatars in this place and I thought it was time for something more personal
<- there we go, me experimenting with make up to make my face look a bit more gaunt ... not that successful but otherwise I usually run away from the cam.
Almost 100% sure these are in order (judging from hair length and colour):
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F1.jpg&hash=e6a58154e13a516f7b4eb11ea5f124df9719bd48)
My first pic, taken at age 19. I used it online a lot in the early days when I was female online.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F2.jpg&hash=fd4e629e63d7b3d6977e812336cc194d8315ffb0)
About 4 months before I transitioned on the job
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F3.jpg&hash=c95c049c79964bb05bf7ac2a62268b259526a272)
First pic of myself after I transitioned on the job
Pretty sure I had a couple of other avatars around this time, but I must have deleted them (from shame)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F4.jpg&hash=9a38af50cdd1da810451a838c6043d662175f8b5)
Anti androgens started in this pic.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F5.jpg&hash=ad475a0e17318b1e312bf8335defd80f1098271e)
Just started on estrogen around the time of this pic
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F6.jpg&hash=9e6fa038cc66e6b7469468a3ebca5839d57e2709)
After I met my fiancé
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F7.jpg&hash=7401f50289a6276bbbca84e6716ce68569415c00)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F8.jpg&hash=295d989b9c43746fe409c6cf156b8b8914f57b3c)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F9.jpg&hash=53ff11bd6e3874cd4350ec55d8112c08825a2583)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F10.jpg&hash=db78f7833a6e206f04df092d4dc760095ce2f0ed)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F11.jpg&hash=0465961953f7e47f926c8962db4536f18a78ab89)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F12.jpg&hash=cd5e3066af46d19587bf2d551d748abad4faf771)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fnoobtown.co.nz%2FAvatars%2F13.jpg&hash=db5037bdbdc1cf0f964ebaee155c81566640e6c2)
A week after getting out of hospital from SRS
Wow, what a wonderful thread! Roxy, you and Patty make such a cute couple. I had been thinking recently that I would probably post some pictures from the past six months in the "Photo Sharing Thread" in the "Just for Us" forum,because even though I'm still pre-transition (no HRT or anything else, just makeup and clothing) I have undergone a number of changes in appearance during that time. And each time I take another step, I gain a lot of confidence in myself. It's interesting to look back and see how we change!
Wow, this is an awesome topic, Erocse (what is an Erocse btw? I always wondered that!). I've always just posted an actual picture of myself like every few months or so as my avatar. I assembled just 12 of the pics but I think they are spaced out pretty evenly from when I first started coming here to mid this year). I never cared about my presentation in pics, what you see is what you get, warts (um, not that I have any of those!) and all :)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi184.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fx153%2Fmeghanandrews%2FMeghanProgression.jpg&hash=378875cbcf17e22f18d949b805fc52e570d2b0bd)
Quote from: MeghanAndrews on December 26, 2010, 10:13:40 AM
Wow, this is an awesome topic, Erocse (what is an Erocse btw? I always wondered that!).
I figured that out the first time I saw her signature as "Roxy" - so... Erocse (Ee-rocks) would be "Roxy" (Rocks-ee) written backwards-and-sideways, sort of... Vewy clevver...
Your kinda right Erocse is Escore backwards. Escore is my first initial then my last name. When I knew it was time to transition I took the internet name (Escore) I have always used and turned it backwards. Kinda symbolic as to how I was feeling about myself "kinda backwards" Well my wife pronounced it "ee-roxy" and after a while it just became Roxy and that stuck. I was not unhappy about this at all. When I get my name change it will be Erocse. I'm stubborn that way and it is always funny to hear people try to pronounce it. :)
And Colleen your avatar is looking great !!!
Hugs Roxy
After I had my FFS/BA I changed my avatar to the creature from the black lagoon. My face was so swollen and bruised that I felt that I would scare little children and stuff.
The most recent one is of my tattoo.
The one just before that was taken by the company photographer to be used in my company bio.
Some people wish for anonymity and I can respect that. I do know that it took a certain amount of courage to post a picture of myself the first time I did it. I felt I was coming out to the world and it was a bit scary. I guess that in many ways it was.
Now, of course, I can look like nothing else, but myself, so posting a picture of my face is just being honest.
-Sandy
Megan.
I really like the photos you've posted.
It's great to see how you've changed so very much. There is so much each of us can achieve, when we put our minds to it.
Often, people at the early stages of their journey talk about all the physical problems they need to over come. Your photos and those of others who have achieved so much should be in inspiration.
From a very hansom looking guy to a stunning woman with such a warm personality.
Everyone who has posted thier avatar has made great changes and all of you look wonderful.
I never like my avatar. The one I am using is a fluke. My daughter made me lucky.
I always think Roxy is beautiful no matter what. Her legs.....are amazing. :) Have to get a Mrs. Robinson pose sometime of her, rolling down her stockings. :)
Quote from: Mrs Erocse on December 26, 2010, 12:43:59 PMHave to get a Mrs. Robinson pose sometime of her, rolling down her stockings. :)
Oohhh, YES!! I have to tell you, those are the moments I feel most feminine, either putting them on or taking them off. The view from my vantage point, of my leg with a stocking either going on or coming off, is just... right. THAT'S what I'm SUPPOSED to look like!
I would put a photo on here but I can never seem to take a decent one of myself. I will have to get my son to bring his best camera over and get some arty shots. You all look great by the way.
Erocse, Kate, Janet, Pebbles, Vexing, Meghan - Thank you!
What an inspiration!
Kendall
im going to have to post a photo of me as a boy...lol
I'd post a photo of me but I'm afraid it'd break somebody's monitor. :P
I would love to post an avatar, and I will in the next few weeks/months probably. I do have a healthy sense of caution after what happened to you and your family Erocse though, so I am holding off for just a bit longer to give those around me some time to get used to me (I came out to the last of my immediate family last Spring.)
I love Avatars though, and I love that people post theirs. It does help give me courage and strength. Thank you! I believe I'll soon be able to post one as well. :)
I love seeing how people change. Unfortunately, I broke my camera about a month ago and haven't gotten around to getting a new one, so I don't have any pictures of my newer haircut, which I like a lot more than the one in my avatar. Oh well, here's what I have:
Senior pic from high school (about 5 years ago)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi226.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fdd78%2FPChanmisao%2FSeniorPic.jpg&hash=1afd549a874d0d1f9c6a8bd6a5bf09edaabea15f)
First Susan's avatar. Celebrating my first shot haircut by mowhawking it. (I don't think I was meant to be a photographer.)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi226.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fdd78%2FPChanmisao%2F09-08-2008313.jpg&hash=93be5da432d01bc56432b29ce495b0730f1c1fd0)
Current avatar.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi226.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fdd78%2FPChanmisao%2Fbw.jpg&hash=73b4e76419a6b57041fb528e3e70296dadf78e65)
Sorry for the poor quality of the photos. I'll try for some better ones when I get a new camera.
WOWZA! You all look fantastic! I've been on Susan's just over a year now I think, and I remember seeing a lot of those avatars! It is so incredible to see people progressing, growing more confident (and more skilled with the camera too...hehe!). So proud for you all!
Strangely I feel inspired and jealous at the same time...I don't feel like I've made much of any progress this past year, mostly due to financial constraints. :embarrassed: Seems like all my major efforts have ended in one debacle after another...but alas, c'est la vie!
I'm afraid I have zero photos of me at all from the past couple years...(ok ok...one of me dressed as a pirate for Halloween...but I doubt that counts, yar!). Hopefully that'll change in the next few months.
You all look great! (And Mrs. Erocse you are always gorgeous as well!!)
Well, I just got here, but the first avatar that was an actual picture of me that I used online would be this goofy pic, from November 2009. I don't think I'm wearing any makeup in this pic, but I'd just gotten a new haircut:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdl.dropbox.com%2Fu%2F5369016%2Ffirst-avatar.jpg&hash=e48d5e1d2394bbe7b7ba60500e4cbd086562484d)
I decided that I hated that pic after awhile, so for a long time, I used a Yahoo! Avatar from March 2010:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdl.dropbox.com%2Fu%2F5369016%2FScreenshot.png&hash=3f7c9077936b4e1994dadcaf95c5ca8ef3df7e93)
Then my hair grew out more, so I switched to this one from September 2010, even though my hair wasn't quite that length. The skin tone came out different, some strange difference btw. Mac OS X and Linux, or maybe Yahoo! changed their colors?:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdl.dropbox.com%2Fu%2F5369016%2Fgemma-long-close-half.png&hash=cd083064b01d8176012104834c5a79402dfdcc66)
Then I finally got a picture I was fairly happy with, in October 2010:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdl.dropbox.com%2Fu%2F5369016%2Fgemma-head.jpg&hash=d1c3b247b1d2cd55ffd958ae0611db0af47dfa49)
My next was one I made at taaz.com in November 2010, but the lighting was wonky, so I washed it out, which made it artistic-y:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdl.dropbox.com%2Fu%2F5369016%2Ftaaz-makeover.jpg&hash=5e537cf195729eee117bcb2e3ae820b00ca1de1f)
I got a nice one from my birthday dinner on December 4, 2010, where for some reason I had my hair the opposite way:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdl.dropbox.com%2Fu%2F5369016%2Fnew-me-head-sm.png&hash=bf94b10f04bcea68f888e22576de8718045d283e)
Lately, I've been using the current one, from my birthday party on December 6, 2010. Even though it's blurry, I like my hair better, since it's the way I usually wear it, rather than reversed (and yes, it is a slightly different version than my actual avatar here):
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdl.dropbox.com%2Fu%2F5369016%2Favatar-120x120-20101206.jpg&hash=60614f561f936fd589d52b2100188ecdfb3efc79)
I remember when I first got here it was actually kinda rare for people to use their actual photo as their avatar and I felt weird for putting my pic out there for everyone to see next to my posts. Then I got rewarded with comments such as "are you the hot ftm from the forums" :D ahh <3 meghan.
I enjoy seeing members progress through their avatar pictures. It's amazing how much our appearances change over time as we get more comfortable with being ourselves.
I can't find my first avatar but here's one of my earlier ones-
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi255.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fhh125%2Fosiris_zoso%2FMe%2Favi100_4480.jpg&hash=df0066015cd39e8047933db42b88d763ec69b28b)
Here's one from earlier this year-
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi255.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fhh125%2Fosiris_zoso%2FMe%2F5-15-10028AVI.jpg&hash=4a3789bc9e8e8b71c9114ff2c5a702cf6afda4e8)
And here's the most recent one that shows more of my face. :P
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi255.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fhh125%2Fosiris_zoso%2FMe%2F013AVI.jpg&hash=cfb66ac06a76b80d69584ea81c330ec4821dca94)
I guess the main difference is the length of my hair getting shorter and shorter (and quitting using the fake facial hair technique). One of these days I'll have to shave my head and make an avatar of that. :D