Susan's Place Transgender Resources

General Discussions => General discussions => ARGHHH! => Topic started by: xxUltraModLadyxx on January 28, 2011, 06:00:54 PM

Title: not really a woman?
Post by: xxUltraModLadyxx on January 28, 2011, 06:00:54 PM
just all the things i'm told almost everyday are starting to get irritating. it's nice to not have to get "real male" shoved down my throat everyday, but since i've been transitioning i'm hearing alot of "you're not really a woman until you've worn a skirt." "you're not really a woman until you've gotten a bikini wax." "you're not really a woman until you've had your first boyfriend." "you're not really a woman until you're someone's maid of honor."  "you're not really a woman until you've learned to bake pie." the list goes on and on. it's just so stupid. why don't you just give me a manual so i can keep track of all this. the day that i'm "really a woman" i'll bake you all apple pie...
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: spacial on January 28, 2011, 06:10:55 PM
I can understand the frustration
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: Janet_Girl on January 28, 2011, 06:19:54 PM
"you're not really a woman until you've worn a skirt."   What if you never have own one.  Like you work or live on a ranch?
"you're not really a woman until you've gotten a bikini wax."   What if you just shave or have never had a bikini?
"you're not really a woman until you've had your first boyfriend."   What if you knew from an early age, you were lesbian?
"you're not really a woman until you're someone's maid of honor."    What if you are always a bride's maid?
"you're not really a woman until you've learned to bake pie."    What if you have never baked?

So they are all just BS because they are just trying to invalidate us.
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: xxUltraModLadyxx on January 28, 2011, 06:24:00 PM
Quote from: Janet Lynn on January 28, 2011, 06:19:54 PM
"you're not really a woman until you've worn a skirt."   What if you never have own one.  Like you work or live on a ranch?
"you're not really a woman until you've gotten a bikini wax."   What if you just shave or have never had a bikini?
"you're not really a woman until you've had your first boyfriend."   What if you knew from an early age, you were lesbian?
"you're not really a woman until you're someone's maid of honor."    What if you are always a bride's maid?
"you're not really a woman until you've learned to bake pie."    What if you have never baked?

So they are all just BS because they are just trying to invalidate us.


yeah, i know. it's completely stupid because i could come up with the same crap on how they can "better" themselves as men or women, but i don't, because i have more meaningful things to focus on in my life.
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: Lee on January 29, 2011, 12:56:07 PM
In that case, I don't know any real women.
Also, I'm expecting my apple pie asap  :)
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: Pinkfluff on January 30, 2011, 03:46:50 PM
Quote from: FallingStar on January 28, 2011, 06:00:54 PM
just all the things i'm told almost everyday are starting to get irritating. it's nice to not have to get "real male" shoved down my throat everyday, but since i've been transitioning i'm hearing alot of "you're not really a woman until you've worn a skirt." "you're not really a woman until you've gotten a bikini wax." "you're not really a woman until you've had your first boyfriend." "you're not really a woman until you're someone's maid of honor."  "you're not really a woman until you've learned to bake pie." the list goes on and on. it's just so stupid. why don't you just give me a manual so i can keep track of all this. the day that i'm "really a woman" i'll bake you all apple pie...

Stuff like that is one of the things I have the least tolerance for. I've gotten some of them too, to one degree or another.

"you're not really a woman until you've worn a skirt."

I think I only wore a skirt once because my mother wanted me to, trying to get me to be what she thought a woman was supposed to be like.

"you're not really a woman until you've gotten a bikini wax."

Even if there was anyone I trusted to do it, it probably still wouldn't happen.

"you're not really a woman until you've had your first boyfriend."

I'm a lesbian.

"you're not really a woman until you're someone's maid of honor."

I have no wish to participate in a typical Christian wedding.

"you're not really a woman until you've learned to bake pie."

So I do bake things sometimes, but usually cookies not pies. And what does this say about men who bake? They'd probably find it insulting, and rightly so.

I have a better one for the people who say these things though: "You're not really a woman until you've fought every second of your whole life just to be who you are."
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: xxUltraModLadyxx on January 30, 2011, 06:59:20 PM
Quote from: Pinkfluff on January 30, 2011, 03:46:50 PM
Stuff like that is one of the things I have the least tolerance for. I've gotten some of them too, to one degree or another.

"you're not really a woman until you've worn a skirt."

I think I only wore a skirt once because my mother wanted me to, trying to get me to be what she thought a woman was supposed to be like.

"you're not really a woman until you've gotten a bikini wax."

Even if there was anyone I trusted to do it, it probably still wouldn't happen.

"you're not really a woman until you've had your first boyfriend."

I'm a lesbian.

"you're not really a woman until you're someone's maid of honor."

I have no wish to participate in a typical Christian wedding.

"you're not really a woman until you've learned to bake pie."

So I do bake things sometimes, but usually cookies not pies. And what does this say about men who bake? They'd probably find it insulting, and rightly so.

I have a better one for the people who say these things though: "You're not really a woman until you've fought every second of your whole life just to be who you are."

this is what i go by. "a real woman is an undefinable free spirited individual who does not need other people telling her who she is."
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: V M on January 30, 2011, 07:30:27 PM
What is my response to someone who tells me I'm not really a woman until... yadda yadda?

"Really? Your not really an A-hole until you act like one... Oh, never mind, I see you've got that covered"

Always serve it up with a big smile
Quote from: FallingStar on January 30, 2011, 06:59:20 PM
this is what i go by. "a real woman is an undefinable free spirited individual who does not need other people telling her who she is."
I like this


Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: Alex37 on January 31, 2011, 01:08:42 PM
Quote from: Lee on January 29, 2011, 12:56:07 PM
In that case, I don't know any real women.

Seconded.  Friends of mine are trying to convince me that I'm a real girl, yet I haven't done most of those things.  Don't listen to them.   :icon_hug:
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: heatherrose on January 31, 2011, 01:53:07 PM


Quote from: FallingStar on January 28, 2011, 06:00:54 PM
..."you're not really a woman until you've worn a skirt."
"you're not really a woman until you've gotten a bikini wax."
"you're not really a woman until you've had your first boyfriend."
"you're not really a woman until you're someone's maid of honor."
"you're not really a woman until you've learned to bake pie."

Sounds like the same BS that born women hear as their are growing up.

Born men hear:

"you're not really a man until you wear long pants."
"you're not really a man until you shave/grow a mustache/beard."
"you're not really a man until you "split green wood"."
"you're not really a man until you can throw a football/baseball."
"you're not really a man until you can take a punch without crying."

and so on.

An "Old School ->-bleeped-<-" tried to tell me,
"real" women don't do this or that
Thinking to myself about how many times
my sisters in the sufferage movement years ago
had heard the same exact thing,
I told her, "This one does."


Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: Robert Scott on January 31, 2011, 01:57:19 PM
My dad told me I wouldn't be a real man b/c I didn't spend my teenage years trying to look up girl's skirts
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: heatherrose on January 31, 2011, 02:06:54 PM


Quote from: Rob on January 31, 2011, 01:57:19 PMMy dad told me I wouldn't be a real man b/c I didn't spend my teenage years trying to look up girl's skirts

So are you going to try to make up for lost time? :icon_chuckel:


Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: Robert Scott on January 31, 2011, 02:09:52 PM
Quote from: heatherrose on January 31, 2011, 02:06:54 PM


So are you going to try to make up for lost time? :icon_chuckel:



LOL....who says I didn't try to look up girls skirts --- I have always liked women ... something he chooses to forget as well...in some ways it was good to have to change clothes in the girls locker room for gym...at least I got some good views - even if I was running to the bathroom to change my shirt
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: TheAetherealMeadow on January 31, 2011, 03:05:37 PM
The worst one is "you're not really a woman until you've experienced the pain of childbirth", often coming from people my own age who have not had children.  ??? I guess they seem to think that only applies to me and not them. I guess in that case, all those childless women out there are not really women!
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: Lee on January 31, 2011, 03:11:15 PM
Quote from: TheAetherealMeadow on January 31, 2011, 03:05:37 PM
I guess in that case, all those childless women out there are not really women!

And some FtM guys are
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: heatherrose on January 31, 2011, 03:16:33 PM



Quote from: TheAetherealMeadow on January 31, 2011, 03:05:37 PMI guess in that case, all those childless women out there are not really women!

Quote from: Lee on January 31, 2011, 03:11:15 PMAnd some FtM guys are


:icon_tenisclap:


Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: heatherrose on January 31, 2011, 03:36:34 PM



With the Friday October 4, 1957 debute of "Leave It to Beaver",
the Columbia Broadcasting System, Ralston Purina, General Electric and the Chrysler Corporation
expected us to believe that "real" women, like June Cleaver, mopped the floor in heels and pearls.
while waiting on her man, hand and foot, as he sat on his ass, smoking his pipe and reading the newspaper.
:eusa_think: Come to think of it, I never saw June read the newspaper, probably wasn't smart enough.



Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: xxUltraModLadyxx on January 31, 2011, 11:20:25 PM
Quote from: TheAetherealMeadow on January 31, 2011, 03:05:37 PM
The worst one is "you're not really a woman until you've experienced the pain of childbirth", often coming from people my own age who have not had children.  ??? I guess they seem to think that only applies to me and not them. I guess in that case, all those childless women out there are not really women!

yeah, and then they say that if you don't have a period, you're not a woman. it's quite amusing that an essential sign of "true womanhood" is the ability to bleed out of your vagina. it's just such an admirable trait!  :)
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: Lee on January 31, 2011, 11:42:25 PM
Quote from: FallingStar on January 31, 2011, 11:20:25 PM
it's just such an admirable trait!  :)

Anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die....
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: justmeinoz on February 01, 2011, 04:37:04 AM
"And you're not a real moron until you say something that stupid?"
Title: Re: not really a woman?
Post by: VanOcc on February 01, 2011, 06:54:38 AM
You're really a woman right now.

Pie pls? :)