I haven't even came out yet (subtly leaving a pamphlet on my table and desk isn't doing anything for my parents), but I'm planning my transition. I have an "idealistic" mindset right now, both of my predictions are pretty outlandish with my family honestly..
I already got my hair cut into a pixie cut last month; I need to get a trim this week.
I'm replacing my wardrobe, but that's gonna take a while since I don't have much money (and anyway most of the clothing is for the summer).
I already have a small "To buy list":
More shirts.
Some hoodies.
Boxers.
STP - Packer.
Binder.
Maybe some cologne.
A swimsuit for the summer.
Swim shorts.
Some books, for kicks.
That's all that comes to mind though, in relation to my transition.
I guess the main question is what do you feel you need the most for the cost? The first thing I bought was a binder because I realized very quickly that using ace bandages or going without was just not going to work.
Well, the first thing I bought was a binder. My mom noticed pretty soon after that, so maybe that'll be doubly useful for you, if it makes your mom notice. As far as clothes go, I would buy:
1. Shirts. Easily the most notable difference between men's and women's clothes.
2 & 3. Boxers and jeans. If you get more self-conscious when wearing girls' underwear, it'll be useful to switch to boxers. If that isn't a problem, I'd go with jeans because my hips tend to make me a little dysphoric.
4. STP/Packer. Peeing standing up is one of the most... exciting? things I've done since coming out. I honestly can't saying peeing has ever been more rewarding.
Then I guess buy as is necessary. As for your swimsuit, I'm going to Hawaii this fall and what I was going to do was wear a somewhat loose fitting binder under a rashguard, and swim trunks. Maybe you could do that? I heard binders get nasty in chlorine, though, so you might want to buy another binder around summer and use your old binder in the pool.
As someone who tried being a guy for 50+ years, I'd say get a haircut you can easily comb to cover both male and female situations. Your hairdresser should be able to help.
As well as guys shirts and jeans, I'd suggest a guys leather jacket of the old Brando style when it gets cooler. If you want to follow up with a bike, then most motorcycle boots are "male" looking, especially motocross boots. Wet weather gear will completely disguise you, as the Michelin Man.
Also helmet hair will do for any trace of the feminine pretty quickly, as I find to my sorrow.
If you are out in the sun you can be skin cancer conscious and use zinc cream on your face, as well as guy-type sunglasses and a hat.
Quote from: justmeinoz on January 30, 2011, 05:41:15 AM
I'd suggest a guys leather jacket of the old Brando style when it gets cooler.
This is completely off topic, but I dreamed that I had a really cool leather jacket last night. I put it on and looked damn good....and then woke up. :laugh:
Anyways, just thought I'd share.
Seconding the leather jacket. I pass almost 100% of the time while I'm wearing mine.
Everyone is different in what is more important to them.
If your #1 goal is about passing and not about overcoming personal dysphoria, then you'd want to focus on things that other people will see:
- binder
- men's shirts
- keeping haircut identifiably male
If you have dysphoria related to things like underwear or not packing, then adjust accordingly. But you can easily get by in public without having boxers or a real packer or anything.
Remember that getting comfortable enough to use an STP in a public restroom takes time. You want to start experimenting with options EARLY because it could take time to get used to at home first. But you can buy a medicine spoon for $2, so this doesn't have to be a costly part of the process.
Last, don't buy a lot of ANYTHING at once until you get a chance to test it out or know what clothes are more passable for you that you like and feel comfortable in. If you buy 3 shirts and find that you pass very well in 1, ok in another, and not at all in the 3d, you *will* stop wearing the 3d shirt and you will almost always want to wear the shirt you pass best in. You will wish you had bought 3 of THAT type of shirt!
I bought a binder first, but my chest is what causes me the most dysphoria. Use coupon "under10" at underworks to get 10% off a binder.
Medicine spoons for STP use are cheap.
Some plain men's T's are cheap too. Check out Amazon for T's. I just bought some plain black size small ones for $2.99 each. Also check out the American Apparel flex fleece hoodies over there, they're way cheaper than AA's site. I like those hoodies since they come in smaller sizes and are slim fit and unisex. Also, get yourself some men's underwear.
Most ftms tend to pass better with the longer 'emo' style hair cuts. Plus that style is unisex.
As much as I hate to admit it, I ended up doing a clothing shopping run at walmart. Cheap, easy, and nobody gives a damn what you look like.
Quote from: Lee on January 30, 2011, 03:20:36 PM
As much as I hate to admit it, I ended up doing a clothing shopping run at walmart. Cheap, easy, and nobody gives a damn what you look like.
I poke around walmart sometimes, but I can never find size small anything in the men's department. :\
Check out the boys section at wally? They typically have some awesome stuff and XL kids typically coincides with small mens. Not that I can fit in that stuff anymore but I used to be able to.. I'm more of a Med-XL on the mens side of things. + the boys side is cheaper.. ahhaha.
Shirts that make your chest look flat/binder/good shirts is a first I would say.