Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transitioning => Therapy => Topic started by: Ribbons on February 08, 2011, 03:47:09 PM

Title: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: Ribbons on February 08, 2011, 03:47:09 PM
I came out to my grandma last night, mostly.. I skipped the "Gender identity" part and simply went to the "I want to go to a therapist" part, but I didn't specify what sort of therapist or why.

I suppose a normal therapist could suggest me to a gender one, since I'm a bit nervous about checking out the local gender therapists' in my state that I've found online..

I've heard weird things about normal therapists in relation to transgendered people. A lot appear to pull out some Freudian stuff and try and "cure" me of some obscure made up mental illness or misdiagnoses me, but I'm not interested in going to a regular therapist honestly.

I'm just having problems telling my grandma I want to go to a gender therapist and why.. If my mom would visit me more often, then I could talk this over with her and she'll understand, but she's stuck having to be at her job all the time. 
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: cynthialee on February 08, 2011, 03:54:29 PM
Find a few local gender therapists you would be ok with seeing then tell grandma you have found the therapist you want. Omit the reason you are seeing them for the time being if you are uncomfortable with grandma knowing whats up at this time.
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: rar on February 08, 2011, 03:54:46 PM
Non-gender-specialist therapists can still be helpful and work with you. You'll just have to see when you get there, and if they won't help you, go somewhere else. You're completely justified in picking a therapist who's right for you.
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: blair on February 08, 2011, 04:22:36 PM
"What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?"

That really depends on the therapist. Really the difference is that gender therapists have experience and have most likely studied more on issues pertaining to gender issues. It's definitely easier just to find someone with the experience so that the learning curve they have isn't on your dime, but if you're in an area where there aren't any therapists with that specialty they may still be able to help you.
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: Amazon D on February 08, 2011, 04:29:03 PM
Normal ones use pencils  :o  poke poke

gender ones use feathers  :D  tickle tickle

;D

It depends on the normalness of the normal one

the gender ones can and like to keep you paying for yrs if they can and you have $ or insurance
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: drippin on February 09, 2011, 07:50:58 PM
Hi there. Yesterday I saw a therapist for the first time. I was very nervous because she was in my Kaiser network and wasn't a gender therapist. Anyway, I went to the meeting in full femme, voice and everything. I seemed to be passing well in the lobby so that put my mind at ease a bit. Anyway, I finally got in to see her, and tell her i'm trans and she goes "oh, did you request me? I specialize in gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender youth. I breathed a huge sigh of relief and we started. She was very respectful and nice and it was just a pleasant experience :D

Anyway, moral of the story is YOU NEVER KNOW. Your therapist could turn out to be a TOTAL sweetheart like mine! :)
and if he/she isn't, you can always switch to a different one :)
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: AweSAM! on February 10, 2011, 06:49:07 PM
I got an amazing therapist, but he has no experience with trans patients. He is very understanding, and it's always been easy to get him on the same page as me, or as close as possible. YMMV; that is the key.
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: japple on February 11, 2011, 09:18:51 PM
My first therapist was a gender therapist, who has worked on books, and she's the one who pulled out the Autogynephelia articles and made me feel terrible about myself.  My latest therapist deals mostly deals with women and has been amazing.  You never know who the good therapists are going to be. 
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: tekla on February 11, 2011, 09:40:19 PM
I think your therapist's approach and techniques in dealing with your issues is far more important than what issues they are dealing with.
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: NikkiJ on February 25, 2011, 09:36:02 PM
Get a therapist who knows about the TS journey. I had a jerk that treated me as an ATM machine, and wasted my valuable time. Then I found someone who knew what they were talking about.
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: Lee on March 07, 2011, 12:42:29 AM
I am seeing a psychiatrist free through my university, and I'm his first trans client.  He obviously doesn't quite know what to do in relation to that, but he is enthusiastic about helping in whatever way he can.  We have come to talking about the fact that I'm horrible at talking about emotions and dealing with uncertain changes, both of which have been in part keeping me from coming out and going full time.  Basically, even someone who doesn't have experience with trans issues specifically can help with other related things.  However, if it's possible I would suggest finding a gender therapist.  I am planning on doing that when I graduate in a few months.
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: Jamiess on March 12, 2011, 12:37:02 PM
I live in a city where there aren't any therapist that have experience with GID. My therapist has tried to approach it as a gay issue. My problem is not sexual orientation. It is best to get someone that has experience with this if possible. I'm not sure of your age but your are protected from disclosure. Most therapists don't usually see one specific type of client/patient. They would need many GID cases to stay in business. Your grandmother will most likely not be aware of the specifics, so it may be best to go to a gender therapist first. If you don't and your first therapist refers you to a gender therapist it may highlight what your issue is.
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: MelRidger on March 29, 2011, 10:03:40 PM
I've seen a regular therapist twice so far. There are no gender therapists in my small town. When I disclosed my issue she said she has worked with a few transgender patients. The second time she asked me what I wanted to do on the agenda. I'm not sure how to answer that. What do other people usually, "work on." ???

I originally planned not to tell anyone until I moved out of my parent's house in a few months when I am in better health. However, I did talk to my mom about it some this week.  :oI held a lot back and just told her that I have issues with my gender and want to go to a large state university where I could find a support system to decide where I wanted to take this. I talked about getting my hair cut into a short androg haircut and getting a binder (after explaining that to her) ;)

It looks like ordering a binder was more complicated than I expected so I haven't decided on anything and I'm at the same point with the hair cut.  ???
Title: Re: What would a normal therapist do to you in comparison to a gender one?
Post by: NikkiJ on March 31, 2011, 09:27:17 AM
Well, you will encounter many things at the university that will show you the would beyond your small town, and you will have lots to think about.

Work hard at school when you get there, because you want to be able to write your own ticket when you graduate.

As for your agenda, we're all different, but I would think that you want to plan how to discover yourself and what that will mean when you interact with the rest of the world.

I wish you well, you have so much opportunity.