Hi I know I've posted something about hockey a while ago, but I have another question. So I play goalie on a girls u14 team and were in our district tourney right now. We are already advancing to regions too. There was a coah from another u14 girls team that scouted me yesterday and he wants me to be on his AAA team. So my question is I guess what should I do? I'm doing really good an getting noticed and scouted for girls hockey, but I was hopin to transition for school next year. Does anybody have experience with this? Should I say no to offers to play on teams? I don't wanna play girls hockey, but what if I can't even get on a crappy boy's team?
It's a catch 22 ... you could play but if you do you can't take T ... it's consider an enhancer and would disqualify your team.
Another option is to look to see if you could join a boys team
Wow, that is tough. I play and have coached ice hockey. You are at a difficult age to be switching or making that kind of decision. I feel for you.
Right now, I don't think you should worry about anything except playing well in your tournament, and whatever happens, happens. A lot of things have to happen before this becomes an actual decision to make.
If you do want to look past your next game though (and the coach in me is thinking: just focus on your game, deal with the rest later! haha)....
...here are some questions to think about:
When you say you had planned to transition, do you mean that you'd be living full-time as a boy or did you mean something else?
There is a technical difference in eligibility if you are starting certain hormones (and which ones).
If you're not doing anything medically and just changing your name & presenting as a boy, playing on a girl's team would still out you as trans. Are you prepared to be a boy who plays girl's hockey? Are you prepared to be a trans boy who plays boy's hockey? This affects how people view you, how people expect you to be in lockerrooms, and how teammates/opponents will treat you. Do you live in a state or district that actually has rules about this?
How important is it to you to play competitive hockey of any type? What opportunities for boy's hockey do you have? (sounds like you know you need to look at this further). Have you played goalie against boys your own age often to know how you measure up? Being a goalie can be good and bad. A hardworking kid can often make it as a back-up goalie and teams often need goalies. Plus, goalies can be totally weird and no one cares. :) At the same time, it's easier to hide as a hard working weaker player if you can be put on the 4th line. Playing time could be a real challenge.
The jump from pee wees to bantams to midgets/high school hockey are MAJOR ones, and it's the ages which show the most attritition, meaning most boys who play hockey until they are 13/14 then drop out. Girls hockey doesn't have quite the same issue, though it is much more common for talented girls in those ages to be playing up a bracket or two. I 've coached 7th grade girls on par with 11th graders.
It seems like some regions are developing programs and teams to capture the boys who will not be going on to play competitive hockey throughout high school. You may want to investigate and see whether that exists where you live. That may be your best bet.
Now, take a deep breath, and enjoy playing NOW. Hockey is the best sport (as you and I know), and just trust that it'll work out. If you want to pm me, go ahead. I probably have a ton more to say, but don't want to make it all public.
Thanks for fast replies guys :)
Rob- I do want to take T and I know I would have to play boy's hockey to do that, but my mom doesn't want me on T yet anyways.
Sean- Yep, my championship game for my district is this Saturday.. Can't wait!!
Anyways, yes I meant I want to live fully as a boy next year. I'm moving this summer so it would be a perfect time, I think. I want to be stealth next year and play boys hockey. I'm just worried about making it on a good team and actually getting playing time. I'm also worried because I'm smaller than a lot of guys in my grade so they could probably kill me haha.
Sometimes we have shared practices with the bantam teams and we've done some drills together... My coaches kept asking me if I was ok and if I could handle it, but then after the drill nobody scored on me and they were like :o . It was awesome. So I think I could do it. I live in Minnesota... So there are lots of teams here, state of hockey ;D
A lot of refs and coaches and parents that I've played against this season talk to my parents/ coaches and they say stuff like they're going to watch where I go and they're excited to see my high school hockey career. I'm playing on a team of a bunch of kids from different cities, and they all want me to go to their schools and play on their teams next year. So I have a lot of opportunities for girls hockey.. I just wish it was for boys hockey :-\
Thanks for your help ;D
I am in MN too ... I don't know if your going through the U or what ... but there is a program called Reclaim - and there is a family group. My son went through the program. I am a part of the family group and there are several kids who are ftm who are around that age .... a couple have started taking T but they are all on hormone blockers. Couple of the parents were against their kids taking hormones so young but after being part of the group they changed their minds. I hope at least your on hormone blockers.
I don't know where your moving too...but I want to say if your close to St. Louis Park - the school is totally accepting and have half a dozen trans kids enrolled.
Cool :) . I go to a gender exploration group thing with dianne berg and other people. (Are we allowed to say names on here?) It's the 2nd and 4th Monday of every month, I think. It just started not that long ago. No, I'm not on hormone blockers :( but I wish I was.
My parents don't know where they want to move yet, but I will tell them to think about St. Louis Park :)
Check out
http://reclaim-lgbtyouth.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=5&Itemid=54 (http://reclaim-lgbtyouth.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=5&Itemid=54)
The family group is good ... have lots of ages ... and it's run by several folks. It has been very helpful to me as a parent. It's where we learned to get hormones for less .... what doctors work best with young adults/children...and it's a place where parents can talk about the scary things that our kids don't always understand. It is open to all parents - some aren't ready to accept their child is trans and still use the birth name and pronouns to other parents who are fully supportive. There are several who have kids in high school and some who go stealth in school. It's a good program
Awesome! I'll show my mom later. It sounds perfect cuz my mom is totally supportive, but my dad isn't yet. Thanks :)
hey bryden...
here's something else you might want to check out because of a situation I ran into with competitive sports. I competed at a national pro level in a sport - I go to transition - thinking that maybe with T - I might not be competitive at pro level in mens - but I could dick around in the ameteur levels. I look at the rulings - taking T is considered doping. They do take trans people as exceptions - however they have a 2 year ban wgile your body adjusts to the mones. I cannot race until I've been 2 years on T now again - unless it's just in un sanctioned fun toonie races at places or wherever.. you might want to check out your rulings in the hockey lleagues (guys ones).. that youre looking at playing.
Quote from: Tad on February 24, 2011, 08:34:56 PM
hey bryden...
here's something else you might want to check out because of a situation I ran into with competitive sports. I competed at a national pro level in a sport - I go to transition - thinking that maybe with T - I might not be competitive at pro level in mens - but I could dick around in the ameteur levels. I look at the rulings - taking T is considered doping. They do take trans people as exceptions - however they have a 2 year ban wgile your body adjusts to the mones. I cannot race until I've been 2 years on T now again - unless it's just in un sanctioned fun toonie races at places or wherever.. you might want to check out your rulings in the hockey lleagues (guys ones).. that youre looking at playing.
FTMs who take T need to get a medical exemption for the T to avoid violating doping rules.
The "2 year wait" thing refers specifically to international federations & elite competition, not youth or high school sports in the United States. This is not at ALL something the OP has to be thinking about right now. Just not relevant.
Beyond that, I think you're making some assumptions about the rules that face you, Tad. The 2 year rule is applied case-by-case, NOT universal, and it was created for MTFs who have an advantage prior to transition (and arguably for some time after). You and I have discussed your situation before, but unless you have an actual ruling/decision on your eligibility from the official body making the decision, I believe your presumptions about having a 2 year ban are likely to be inaccurate. They are likely to allow you to compete earlier than that with a proper documents from your doctors showing stable, male range blood hormone levels.
I've been in contact Sean. So far the local ruling body says I can compete in the gender combined classes which equals non sanctioned event aka dicking around fun races and only one event has one of those out of the scheduled race season. Otherwise.. nothing besides non sanctioned fun races broskis.
Essentially what I'm saying though is he should be checking into what the legal rulings are in his districts, some groups outside of my sport (like school sports) have things like if you're on hrt youre with the boys, non hrt you're still with the girls. Not saying that he should bring it up or anything and out himself to potential coaches, just know what the consequences could be if they were to somehow find out he was trans competeing in a boys league, or if he started hrt while in a girls league. There are likely non - but it's possible there could be some. He should just make sure he has all his bases covered, rather then potentially find himself in a mess half way through the season.
Another big thing to consider is how are the guys going to react once they find out you're a ->-bleeped-<- on stealth mode. I mean.. guys routinely whip their dicks out in the locker room, do idiotic things, compare penis size, nipple twisters, stuff like that. I remember high school. If youre team finds out what you are, which chances seem high in a hockey locker room context, it's possible that if they go to youre school - you're whole trans stealth situation will be ruined, not just on the team - but at school too.
Tad- I know but I'm not worried about it because I'm shy and people don't really bother me, even guys. And I wouldn't let anybody mess with me anyways lol
I play girls hockey to AND IM A GOALIE WOOT
ive been asked to play on A and AA teams before i knew i was trans
this is my last year of midget so i stuck with girls because i played boys last year and hated it
if your going to switch to guys youll have to change in a different room etc witch sux so i wouldnt recommend it