Glioblastoma Multi-form Grade 3, malignant. rapid growing, non-curable, they are going to try, but the doc said that the goal isnt to cure the cancer, but to remove as much as surgically possible, then 2-3- weeks after surgery i get to lose my hair from chemotherapy/radiation. He said the gaol with that is to kill as many tumor cells as possible and make the remaining cancer cells go to sleep.
hes talking about thursday 6:30am.
there are new fears now. I mean initially the fear was engendered from thoughts of death. We have all ran across those, in all walks of life that are bias against gay/trans, what if they dont really try, you know,,,
I have been thinking about death a lot lately. My mom died when i was 15, i really don't care about her though, she was an evil, cruel woman. My father killed himself a month or so after i turned 18. He had a lot of medical problems. When i was 8, he was diagnosed with something terminal, told he had 6 months to live at the most. The next 10 years, yes 10 years my dad continued to live if u can call it that. Many trips to the emergency room then on to ICU (intensive care unit) surgery after surgery, tubes coming out of evrry hole he had and some out of man made ones, tracheotomy (tube in throat for oxygen) an oxygen machine at home and several tanks for portable use. I watched my father live in such intense pain. The last picture of him, god you could just see this man in so much pain...it took me many years to realize that he waited until i turned 18, when his parental responsibility was complete to end his pain.... I miss him soooo much. He never complained, never took it out on those around him, so noble! Some people become bitter when dying, others don't. My dad was one of a kind. Ill roll with what the doc wants, but i am going to fill out a DNR (do not resuscitate). I am not so fearful of death now, just becoming a vegetable
Hi Kitty
My toughts are with you honey.
I hope that with that cure the cancercells will sleep and never wake up again.
I know what you're talking about, I've worked for several years on the Intensive Care.
You are right to sign a dnr, a life as a vegetable is not humanly.
Kitty I can't tell you how sorry I am with this bad news.
you have my deepest sympathy.
I really don't know what to say beside that I wish you a lot of strenght.
Sorry dear, sorry, you are to young and beautifull to go trough all of this.
many hugs and love
Annette
Hi Kitty;
As I said in a previous post, but will keep saying it. You are loved. My thoughts and prayers are always with you hon. Please, always remember that.
Hugs
Beth
Oh my :( My thoughts are with you, Kitty. Malignant cancer is definitely not fun, but you can beat it. I and many more will be pulling for you so hang in there!
~Amy
there is no need for you to be sorry, its ok. You know I have for all my life tried very hard to find positive in the negative. I have needed to because there has been so much negative in my life, some my own doing, some not.....well sweetie, here is something i find comfort in: its better it be me than someone with a wife, husband, children parents, whatever. Its better it be me cuz I dont have those things, u know? I mean i know u all say that you are family and thats fine, but im talking about real deal. makes it easier for me knowing that there will be no one in the waiting room for a dr to have to talk to. Its easier for the doc not having grieving family members to deal with, and if the worst case scenario happens and i croak, im hurting no one. That makes me feel a lot better. Weird huh? i have never been one that enjoys hurting others. Its nothing new, being alone. Im thankful that i have been alone my entire life, it has prepared me for this battle i am about to engage in. I know that there is going to be a physical toll, that physically treatment alone is going to wear me down. I am a stubborn person, especially in the face of adversity, not one to bow, to anyone or anything....the fact that there is a growth in my head and it might kill me. The will to live is not found on a conciouse level, no. It is something deeper, on a subconciouse level, deep. I have that, i know i do. And I do NOT need someone that loves me to fight for my life. I am sure that in my sub concious i have a real problem with a stupid little tumor killing me. Just do.......the doc, well thats another story. If he loses his will to save me, well then im screwed
You are in my prayers.
:icon_hug:
Awwww Kitty. I was hoping for better news. :( But you are a strong woman. Never give up the fight. It is hard for someone who is not in your shoes to say "Don't give up", but I have to look to the faith of the human spirit. You do what you need to.
You will always be in my prayers. :icon_hug:
Quote from: superkitty036 on March 26, 2011, 01:14:53 PM
there is no need for you to be sorry, its ok. You know I have for all my life tried very hard to find positive in the negative. I have needed to because there has been so much negative in my life, some my own doing, some not.....well sweetie, here is something i find comfort in: its better it be me than someone with a wife, husband, children parents, whatever. Its better it be me cuz I dont have those things, u know? I mean i know u all say that you are family and thats fine, but im talking about real deal. makes it easier for me knowing that there will be no one in the waiting room for a dr to have to talk to. Its easier for the doc not having grieving family members to deal with, and if the worst case scenario happens and i croak, im hurting no one. That makes me feel a lot better. Weird huh? i have never been one that enjoys hurting others. Its nothing new, being alone. Im thankful that i have been alone my entire life, it has prepared me for this battle i am about to engage in. I know that there is going to be a physical toll, that physically treatment alone is going to wear me down. I am a stubborn person, especially in the face of adversity, not one to bow, to anyone or anything....the fact that there is a growth in my head and it might kill me. The will to live is not found on a conciouse level, no. It is something deeper, on a subconciouse level, deep. I have that, i know i do. And I do NOT need someone that loves me to fight for my life. I am sure that in my sub concious i have a real problem with a stupid little tumor killing me. Just do.......the doc, well thats another story. If he loses his will to save me, well then im screwed
I'm not dealing with a situation like yours at this time but I can definitely relate to allot of what you said here... My thoughts are with you Kitty :-*
Hugs
- Virginia
Thinking of you Kitty. One never knows what is around the corner in life and you seem to have had a much harder path than most. Good luck and we are always around to talk to when times get tough.
Stay strong hun. x
My love goes out to you hun. Everything will be okay, even if it isnt to you..everything in the end, will be okay. You are loved and you have my prayers with you. Huggggs!
Hi, Kitty,
My heart goes out to you. We all are praying for you! God bless. Hugs!
I am looking at the possibility of prostate cancer, the type that took out Dan Fogelberg at age 56. I got my own PSA and a full blood panel test in two weeks to determine if I should have the prostate cancer biopsy done. If it drops below 2 ng per ml, The HRT is working and I may have prostratitis instead. Last year it was 5.8, well above the trigger level of 3 - 4, depending on physician, for a biopsy. It may be 2 weeks afterward for the test results to be in. Get well!
Joelene.
Your strength is inspiring!! I send you my love and positive thoughts! <3 :)
Quote from: superkitty036 on March 26, 2011, 01:14:53 PM
there is no need for you to be sorry, its ok. You know I have for all my life tried very hard to find positive in the negative. I have needed to because there has been so much negative in my life, some my own doing, some not.....well sweetie, here is something i find comfort in: its better it be me than someone with a wife, husband, children parents, whatever. Its better it be me cuz I dont have those things, u know? I mean i know u all say that you are family and thats fine, but im talking about real deal. makes it easier for me knowing that there will be no one in the waiting room for a dr to have to talk to. Its easier for the doc not having grieving family members to deal with, and if the worst case scenario happens and i croak, im hurting no one. That makes me feel a lot better. Weird huh? i have never been one that enjoys hurting others. Its nothing new, being alone. Im thankful that i have been alone my entire life, it has prepared me for this battle i am about to engage in. I know that there is going to be a physical toll, that physically treatment alone is going to wear me down. I am a stubborn person, especially in the face of adversity, not one to bow, to anyone or anything....the fact that there is a growth in my head and it might kill me. The will to live is not found on a conciouse level, no. It is something deeper, on a subconciouse level, deep. I have that, i know i do. And I do NOT need someone that loves me to fight for my life. I am sure that in my sub concious i have a real problem with a stupid little tumor killing me. Just do.......the doc, well thats another story. If he loses his will to save me, well then im screwed
Kitty,
I am the new girl on the block but I just want say your attitude in dealing with this rocks. It isn't easy to find the positives in a negative. You keep digging deep girl because with everything you said here it tells me you are a real fighter. My thoughts and prayers are with you...Katrina
Quote from: RoseBlossom on March 26, 2011, 03:04:17 PM
My love goes out to you hun. Everything will be okay, even if it isnt to you..everything in the end, will be okay. You are loved and you have my prayers with you. Huggggs!
You get it...but even for me, if i croak, its still ok. I mean yeah i wish I would have done some things, sure,,,,,but I am warmed by the things I didnt do as well!!
Quote from: Joelene9 on March 26, 2011, 03:36:32 PM
Hi, Kitty,
My heart goes out to you. We all are praying for you! God bless. Hugs!
I am looking at the possibility of prostate cancer, the type that took out Dan Fogelberg at age 56. I got my own PSA and a full blood panel test in two weeks to determine if I should have the prostate cancer biopsy done. If it drops below 2 ng per ml, The HRT is working and I may have prostratitis instead. Last year it was 5.8, well above the trigger level of 3 - 4, depending on physician, for a biopsy. It may be 2 weeks afterward for the test results to be in. Get well!
Joelene.
really, it took two weeks to get your biopsy results back? thats a long time, it only took a couple days for me,,,thanjfully
Mine is through a health fair. Same screenings, lower cost. I am on a fixed income, pre-Social Security! I'm not eligible for Medicare yet. My insurance company dropped me and all others when they withdrew their insurance coverage in my state! Aetna!
Joelene
Back in 2003 my mother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. It's a very nasty thing let me tell you. Average mortality from time of diagnosis is about 6 months and the 5 year survival rate after major surgery if you are a candidate for treatment is less than 5%. Mom is going on 8 years now and continues to thrive. It wasn't easy by a long shot and I attribute her continued positive health to both her oncologist and her will to not let it beat her. She is 75 now.
I guess I'm just saying that even with the bleakest prognoses, there is hope. I'm new to posting here, but wanted to take a moment to share a bit of that hope that I have personally experienced and to say keep fighting. :) and that you are in my prayers as well.
--Becka
This is tough news to have to swallow.I was told a few years back that my liver was shutting down and turning cancerous-oh boy. I endured a year & a half of pills and shots I had to give myself every other day-chemo without radiation. But I did what my Endo said do and I am still here and have some of my hair but not all came back. I am not ready to order the wigs yet.
Life is so short and most of us fail to see what is most important-family, friends, happiness - not necessarily in that order. I had things rough too when I was young but not to the degree you have described. Hang in there girl, life throws us curve balls and we deal. You have lots of people here who care about what happens to you-including me.
Randi
How much of your tumor was removed for the biopsy? Location? Size?
Kate
Sad to hear and sorry for there is not much we could do, but we wish you the best.