Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: Marta on April 01, 2011, 04:52:55 AM

Title: hello, a little help?
Post by: Marta on April 01, 2011, 04:52:55 AM
hello im trying to help my uncle find new female wardrobe, is there a good way of helping him come out of his shell and feel comfy? id like to go shopping with him  ;D its a little different since im only 20 and hes in his 40's but its still fun, so any advice?
Title: Re: hello, a little help?
Post by: Padma on April 01, 2011, 04:57:24 AM
One thing I thought of is that you and she could go through catalogues together (paper or online) and she could tell you what she likes the look of. That would probably be very liberating for her, if she feels ready to do that with you, and be safer-feeling than going out shopping. Plus when you do go out shopping, you'll both have a better idea about what she likes and where to find it, which makes a big difference to feeling confident shopping, I find.

[edited to correct "uncle"-centric genders ::)]
Title: Re: hello, a little help?
Post by: bethw on April 01, 2011, 05:56:04 AM
Hi Marta;
You are such a great niece. If she's up to going out and trying things on Kohl's, Fashion Bug and Lane Bryant are great places for TG girls. If she needs lingerie, Victoria's Secret is perfect. She'll be on overload in that store. They're very helpful and will do a bra fitting for her with no problem.
Hope this helps.
Hugs
Beth
Title: Re: hello, a little help?
Post by: Sandy on April 01, 2011, 06:47:19 AM
Marta:

Thank you Marta!  You have no idea how helpful having the support of your family is in making this process easier.  You are very special indeed!

Another place to start is in the resale shops.  You can find a really great selection there as well without having to pay top dollar.

Another thing you could do is to help her with makeup.  Teach her the basics of every day makeup and how to find her natural style.

By the tone of your post, I get the impression that she may still feel uncomfortable with talking about how she feels and how to express her true self.  That is quite normal but with your support I'm sure she'll soon start to feel comfortable in her new life.

-Sandy
Title: Re: hello, a little help?
Post by: Janet_Girl on April 01, 2011, 10:57:02 AM
Goodwill.  No one care at Goodwill.  And you can get a ton of clothes for a little money.

For makeup, If you don't wish to help her or do it.  Go to any mall and most of the big stores have cosmetic counters and they all offer makeovers.
Title: Re: hello, a little help?
Post by: Kaisa on April 02, 2011, 05:50:03 AM
What is also very nice is to make your own clothes, I used to do that when I came out of the closet almost 3 years ago. I also think it is good you take your aunt to the mall. I, especialy in the begining, was to afraid and ashamed to ask female company with me and looking at skirts or even being in the women section of a clothingstore made me feel realy uncomfortable. It was realy nice that my good friends just 'forced' me to come with them.
Title: Re: hello, a little help?
Post by: justmeinoz on April 02, 2011, 05:59:36 AM
Marta, it's wonderful to see support like yours for someone trying to find their true self.
If you are shopping together, most people will assume you are father and daughter shopping for Mum anyway, so tell her not to be shy. Shop assistants only see a customer with money anyway!
Have fun.  Karen.
Title: Re: hello, a little help?
Post by: nickikim on April 03, 2011, 12:08:35 PM
 I found shopping easier when i started being honest with the sales people, i did get a few "eeeeewww freak" looks ,but most are freindly and helpful. The worst seem to be the 30-45 age range women , just uncomfortable cause i look so good, ha . The tricky thing for me was finding tops to fit my shoulders that didn,t hang off my middle, then i found a mom and pop tailor shop to take things in for me, way cheap, and i think the nice lady who does the sewing laughs with me,mostly.  Sales people are out to get your money so, if you keep coming back,they`ll be sure to keep you happy . Some of my most encourging allies, started out as nosey sales people.  Tell your uncle she has an amazing neice .