I am younger. I live in the middle of nowhere georgia.. Kind of. Ready for the fun part.. I live in "cumming". Lol. I came out to my mom about being a ftm about a year ago. She knows but Boone recognizes it unless I travel about an hour away. My moms excuse is tht it'll mess up my little brother. He's autistic, has tourettes, and is really OCD. I'm her only "daughter" and think she wants to keep it that way. No one where I live accepts it. It's taken me 4 years for them to be ok with me just being a butch lesbian. My mom said no one understands and I'll just have to wait til I'm older and things will get better but what about now. I've already dropped out of highschool. Had my run in with drugs to cope. (sober a year and almost 3 months). I just wish there was something to help take away peoples negativity where I live. There isn't ONE support group near me. I have to drive a while to get to one. Here's the catch. I can't drive because I dropped out because highschool was a bad place for me with all the negativity. What do I do..
I know how it can be. Im actually about 45 min east of you, and live in a more accepting city in GA, but, it can still be rough at times. Its always rough in the beginning, for anyone, ftm or mtf. You just have to try to keep your head up, and the best advice I have is to wait until you're 18 and then you can be on your own. I don't know if you have a job, but, the most important thing right now is to try to save money. Anything will help in the long run. There are tons of people here that will be here to talk to, so, just remember that when things get tough, you have support, even if you cant get there in person.
xo
Ali
My sister lives in Georgia too :D My step mom pulled that same quilt tripping crap, saying that I was a bad influence to my younger brother and others, and that I was the 'daughter she never had ' feh. Ignore it. They're trying crazy rationalizations to convince you that you don't need help, which is both selfish and ignorant. She also told me that I was too young and impressionable to know who I really was, or what was good for me (I'm almost 21).
Don't drop out of high school! As long as they ask for it on an application, it's still relevant. Go back and finish, wait until you're on T/ change your name if that will help. If that takes too long, go get your GED. I know that I sound like a nagger but it's the truth, I know. I used to abuse substances too. I've drinken a lot when depressed, taken prescription drugs (they were given to me fair and square, but I didn't need as many as the doc gave me, so I took them unnecessarily to get the high). That stuff is a great distraction, but when you wake up in the morning with a hangover, your problems will still be there. You'll die of liver disease before you drink your problems away. I'm really glad to hear that you've been sober for so long, good for YOU!
I dealt with the same negativity for years. Just be strong, get a job, move out. Heck, get emancipated if you have to. There were no groups where I lived either, so this site was my only solace to ask questions and post posts like this one. I ended up moving 100 miles from my parents in the end. I hope this helps, at least a little.
I was lucky in a way. I've lived as a male for four years, and when I came out to my mom, she said "I don't think your trans. Gender neutral maybe, but not trans." Unlike a lot of people, I have quite a bit of family support, and I wish everyone had supportive parents. Being trans is probably one of the hardest things to deal with because it's still so misunderstood. Hold in there, hopefully your mother will start to understand as time goes on.
Start going by a guy name, cut your hair (if you want), wear more guyish stuff, she'll hopefully come around.
As far as your mom using your younger brother's Autism to suggest you delay your transition, she's not totally off base. Autistic kids depend on their routines, same for OCD. So yeah, it could really set him back. HOWEVER, I'd think his therapist could work with the two of you for him to come to some sort of understanding, which he never may - but at least its not an absolute reason not to transition.
As for the rest of it, there are plenty of uneducated GLBT kids out there. There's no need for you to be a part of that. Do whatever you need to to, at least get your GED.
And for the record, I too live in Georgia. :)
I also dropped out of highschool and tried to use drugs to cope. I think one of the best decisions I've made was going back, putting up with the ->-bleeped-<-, and graduating. I strongly suggest going back and finishing. Being trans is expensive, with all the surgeries and a life time of hormones. You're going to need a good paying job that an education can get you. How does dropping out stop you from getting your license?
Quote from: Sharky on May 21, 2011, 09:12:39 PM
How does dropping out stop you from getting your license?
Georgia law...
http://www.gateendrivereducation.dds.ga.gov/schoolattendance.html (http://www.gateendrivereducation.dds.ga.gov/schoolattendance.html)
Quote from: regan on May 21, 2011, 09:43:15 PM
Georgia law...
http://www.gateendrivereducation.dds.ga.gov/schoolattendance.html (http://www.gateendrivereducation.dds.ga.gov/schoolattendance.html)
Oh, that's weird.
It wasn't a choice to drop out. My mom forced me to. But i have my GED book.. I hate it but my mom won't let me go back.. But I know it'll mess up my lil brother but he already knows about me liking girls... Hes never seen me with a boy haha an I already dress as a man. Ppl think Im a boy until ppl correct them.. Makes me feel weird when they do. But when I figure out how to put pictures on here off an iPod I'll c lol and Georgia gets better down in atl... I hate this place..
Quote from: alex_mcclusky on May 21, 2011, 11:28:55 PM
It wasn't a choice to drop out. My mom forced me to. But i have my GED book.. I hate it but my mom won't let me go back.. But I know it'll mess up my lil brother but he already knows about me liking girls... Hes never seen me with a boy haha an I already dress as a man. Ppl think Im a boy until ppl correct them.. Makes me feel weird when they do. But when I figure out how to put pictures on here off an iPod I'll c lol and Georgia gets better down in atl... I hate this place..
Why correct people when they think you're a boy?
He was saying that others correct people. Probably his mom and/or friends.
I just came back from a visit with my sister-in-law's family. This is the first time they seen me as "Roxy". They have two boys the oldest (12) is autistic. I have to admit I was a little worried about how he might react or if it would be difficult for him to adjust to. I was amazed at how he warmed up to his new aunt Roxy. I actually think the two boys liked "aunt Roxy" better then the uncle they used to know. So , I think you will be surprised at how your brother will handle it.
This was funny. I was sitting talking to my sister-in-law and not really paying attention to the boys behind me, but I heard my old name being said over and over, by Daniel (the autistic one) He tends to repeat things allot. After about four or five times I heard the name Roxy in a very quiet sweet voice. I turned around to see him smiling at me.
I wish I could offer more support , but, Be yourself, don't let people hold you back. Your bother may just like his new older brother better.
Hugs, Roxy
Quote from: Roxy Rose on May 25, 2011, 05:36:31 PM
After about four or five times I heard the name Roxy in a very quiet sweet voice. I turned around to see him smiling at me.
I wish I could offer more support , but, Be yourself, don't let people hold you back. Your bother may just like his new older brother better.
Hugs, Roxy
Beautiful advice from Roxy. Take it to the bank. It's right on.
:) Lacey