Just finished up another cruise with my wife and it was a breakthrough week for us. I dressed daily in plain androgynous looking woman's clothing (shorts, t shirts, nude hose etc). Had on light makeup often.
We have been married for almost 30 years and my gender fluidity / CD / trans (I don't even know what to call it anymore) has always been an issue. But slowly but surely she's showing more acceptance. She usually doesn't participate when I dress as a woman. She's ok with me dressing but usually keeps her distance. This past week I asked if I could go to the themed white party as a woman... this was full transformation with wig and full makeup and not the stealth stuff I was doing all week. Usually she would say no. Surprise surprise she agreed.
I was nervous as heck but the evening went well. The ship was already decorated for the holiday season and fellow passenger kindly took a picture of us.
Last month we did a Halloween themed cruise and I went as Wonder Woman but this was different. It's one thing to dress up over Halloween but entirely different from a regular party. I got a few "double looks" and negative stink eye from some guests at the white party but ignored them at the party. Most passengers were cool.
This past week on the cruise we've had some deep conversations and it feels like we have made real progress. So much so that I am more comfortable referring to myself as trans than a CD when talking to her. And she hasn't freaked out.
The massive breakthrough? She has agreed that we can take a cruise next year as a full girls trip where I can go fulltime as a woman with her. I'm literally thinking it must be a dream but this past week we have never laughed so much or had such a good time. And I told her it's because she's seeing the "real" me.
I'm very grateful for her and how things are progressing. I've told her that I want to come out of the closet and live more authentically but I will be patient and won't move faster than her comfort levels.
