Hi PricelessMy name is
Sarah and I would also like to formally, Welcome you to Susan's Place!
I see that other members of Susan's have also welcomed you as well.
You definitely succeeded with the attention grabber. Many of us start our stories in childhood, but saying it has only just begun is actually very familiar here too. For a lot of people, the beginning is not when we are young, it is when we finally stop hiding. And one thing that comes up again and again here is that you are never too old to start.
You have come to the right place. You will find support here on Susan's from people who have lived through very different paths, some smooth, some extremely hard, but with common threads that you will probably feel familiar to you as you read. Right now, even if it does not feel like it, you do have people here who understand and who will listen.
For many of us, moving forward did not happen all at once. It happened in very small steps, often just one at a time. With others it was very fast, like me. Simply being here and telling your story is already one of those steps.
One practical thing that can help early on is simply knowing what support exists around you. That might mean looking for a GP or a therapist who is experienced with gender issues and informed consent. Not because you must do anything right now, but because having information gives you options and options give you breathing room.
What you wrote about knowing you were a girl at a young age really stood out to me. For me it showed up as wanting to wear female clothing, something I kept entirely to myself and still keep very private. Being forced into therapy and psychiatry at that age is something no child should have to carry and I am genuinely sorry that happened to you.
Staying hidden, especially growing up in a hard and dangerous environment, must have been exhausting. Even today, caution can be a form of self protection. Finding ways to survive does not mean you were wrong or weak, it means you did what you had to do.
The persona you describe makes a lot of sense. Presenting strongly as male can be a shield, a way to make sure nobody looks too closely. I did something similar, though in much milder and quieter ways, so please know you are not alone even in that. You might find it helpful to read the story of Jessica_Rose, as there are parallels that may give you both insight and reassurance.
I hear how hard your life has been. My own life has been comparatively easy, but that does not stop me from listening or from taking your story seriously. You deserve to be heard and you deserve to move forward at your own pace.
You are welcome here. Reach out when you feel ready. There are people here who will walk alongside you as you find your footing.
Once you feel comfortable here, it would be appreciated if you add a little bit more about yourself in the other forums and threads. I would appreciate it very much as, I'm always interested in learning something new about new members.
In addition members of Susan's will more than likely will discuss problems or issues that are similar to yours as most have experienced these issues as well.
Please keep in mind when posting that this is an
ALL AGES PUBLIC Forum and the internet never forgets. Do not post anything that you do not want to be made public.
Take care and all the best for the future.
Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!Best Wishes AlwaysSarah BGlobal Moderator@Devlyn @Jessica_Rose @Mariah @Northern Star Girl @Lori Dee @Priceless1
