Random ramblings

[Kelly_1979]

That was unexpected ... I'm roughly a year in HRT (restarted after a gap) but with minimal (read aa to a ) growth. I still need years of facial and body laser, plus electrolysis. I have long hair btw.
I went to the bakery to buy the traditional "lagana" bread on my bike , right after my ride. So obviously I was in my kit and no skin was visible.
The guy at the bakery called me repeatedly "Dear" in a feminine form. The first time I thought I misheard but he said the same word at least two more times.

I know my voice basically sucks - it's somewhere in between, so I presume he was just being kind.

Edit: obviously I wasn't wearing ANY makeup or anything - normal "guy" mode

Is there even the slightest possibility he thought I was a woman? (Dressed in black cycling tights and black / yellow cycling jacket and gloves)

[Dances With Trees]

I don't see why not. If something like that happened to me (which seems most unlikely), I would take it as a compliment and smile.

[Kelly_1979]

It's funny though cause I wasn't trying at all or wearing feminine clothing, just my usual cycling clothes. Maybe I have been trying to train my voice subconsciously but I still need A LOT of practice.

[Stottie Girl]

The thing with HRT is that the changes are subtle. Your face probably looks a lot more feminine than you realise. I got a shock when I looked at a picture of me pre HRT. I look very different but the changes happened so slowly I didn't really notice them (I was more preocupied with other changes like boobs!) until one day I was looking in the mirror and I suddenly realised there was a woman looking back at me! I think it's the same for those closest to you who see you everyday. I guess it's only when you encounter a stranger that it starts to dawn on you that you've changed.

I'm around 3 years in and there has started to be a very noticable fat redistribution going on but I swear this has only started happening in the last 3 months or so.

Estrogen is wonderful stuff!

[Kelly_1979]

Umm my bad. I checked and it's actually 2 years not 1 (injections) HRT. I've accepted though that I'm not going to get any more growth than aa/a . Poor genetics I guess+ athletic built (roughly 6 feet /160 pounds) . It's just that I think I look 100% male. Of course it's the body hair / facial hair shadow too. Maybe eyebrow shaping could help too.

Edit: forgot to add, my facial hair is not dense (have had about 10 laser sessions but it was years ago) - need to do more as soon as I have a stable income.

[Stottie Girl]

Umm my bad. I checked and it's actually 2 years not 1 (injections) HRT. I've accepted though that I'm not going to get any more growth than aa/a . Poor genetics I guess+ athletic built. It's just that I think I look 100% male. Of course it's the body hair / facial hair shadow too. Maybe eyebrow shaping could help too.

Edit: forgot to add, my facial hair is not dense (have had about 10 laser sessions but it was years ago) - need to do more as soon as I have a stable income.

Well I'm carrying a bit of weight and, whilst I'm not recommending to put on as much as me, having a bit more weight absolutely makes a difference in the boob stakes as well as with feminine fat deposits. Genetics obviously makes a difference too of course but I am bigger cup size than my mother (DD) so I think there's more than genetics at work. Maybe try putting on a few pounds if you have an athletic build?
With regard to body hair maybe give it more time? Most girls on here do report a reduction over time.

[Charlotte Kitty ✅]

According to various sources you can still get decent breast growth around 3 - 5 years after HRT. The data is very sketchy,  but I try to hold onto this, so you may have later success too. I think a more athletic build can mean smaller breats as they pad with fat.

I know once the weight goes to the right places I want to put on a couple of stone.

I'm keeping fingers crossed for some later growth. BTW is your T well suppressed? I believe suppressing T is more critical than keeping E high for breast growth.

Charlotte 😻

[Stottie Girl]

True, there aren't many big breasted female athletes out there.

[Kelly_1979]

Yes my levels are good. I'm doing EEn monotherapy (no anti androgen) and last time I checked both E2 and testosterone were ok. At least last time I went to my Endo he said it was ok (and testosterone suppressed).
Regarding my weight I'm probably around 162 lb (6 feet). I tried gaining but it went straight to my gut, without looking more feminine or having larger breasts. So I need to lose.

I also do both weight training at home and mountain biking to avoid losing strength and precious muscle mass (not that I have alot, my arms are very thin)? Still, I'm stronger than 2 years ago.

I know it depends on the face structure but generally doesn't brow shaping help somewhat?

Oh forgot, if I want to be sincere my face has actually changed, but only subtly. I used to hate my photos, now I look more "neutral/ self-agreeable" (even In the mirror).

So yeah, I took the "compliment" but didn't say anything nor corrected him obviously.

Oh, and people regularly mistake me for being like 5-10 years younger. Like "you're 46? No way!". So yeah estrogen does help on this too apparently.
Also Garmin estimates my fitness age as 38, based on my VO2 max, FTP etc

[Charlotte Kitty ✅]

I'm not sure how much weight one would need to gain to make a difference to be honest. I'm 183lbs at 5'10 and mine are only a small B, though just under a years HRT. If I stretch they basically dissappear flat! Weight does seem to find it's way to the gut for sure. I thought HRT was meant to send it to the hips but maybe not in all cases?

I'm really pleased to hear HRT is helping with your facial shape and that you don't hate yourself in the mirror. That's a big positive even if changes are subtle. I think it's normally some fat distribution to the cheeks, softening them.

It's funny you're looking to gain muscle mass, whilst I'm desperate to lose it from my arms. My arm muscles are too big, I really don't like them. Not sure how long muscle mass loss takes on HRT. Was the loss quite severe for you?
Charlotte 😻

[Stottie Girl]

Yes my levels are good. I'm doing EEn monotherapy (no anti androgen) and last time I checked both E2 and testosterone were ok. At least last time I went to my Endo he said it was ok (and testosterone suppressed).
Regarding my weight I'm probably around 162 lb (6 feet). I tried gaining but it went straight to my gut, without looking more feminine or having larger breasts. So I need to lose.

I also do both weight training at home and mountain biking to avoid losing strength and precious muscle mass (not that I have alot, my arms are very thin)? Still, I'm stronger than 2 years ago.

I know it depends on the face structure but generally doesn't brow shaping help somewhat?

Oh forgot, if I want to be sincere my face has actually changed, but only subtly. I used to hate my photos, now I look more "neutral/ self-agreeable" (even In the mirror).

So yeah, I took the "compliment" but didn't say anything nor corrected him obviously.

Oh, and people regularly mistake me for being like 5-10 years younger. Like "you're 46? No way!". So yeah estrogen does help on this too apparently.
Also Garmin estimates my fitness age as 38, based on my VO2 max, FTP etc

oh, don't get me wrong, thinning and shaping eyebrows does make a huge difference I would definitely recommend it. It's pretty easy to do a basic brow shape by yourself if you've got tweezers and nail scissors at home.

[Kelly_1979]

As I said, I don't really have too muscle. I never had. My arms have always been slender. That's what I consider one of my "advantages". I have certainly lost muscle as well as power on the bike, although I can still ride long distances. For give an example, I can lift a 35 lb kettlebell above head (triceps workout) about 5 times (using both hands). My grip is still strong (hand grips at 60 kg setting - 30 reps). So I can usually open tight lids. I found that with estrogen it's extremely hard to gain muscle but at least I'm trying not to lose strength (at least not too much). My FTP is 207 W.

I just do simple exercises like overhead press, squats, deadlifts, bicep curls , planks....

Regarding breasts I have small but definite breast mass (not just fat). I don't wear bras though. They seem to serve no use, at least while mountain biking or running. Maybe later on when I start to present as a woman I will.

Oh forgot again, I have navel length straight (grey though but who cares) hair and my face is somewhat oblong. My mom and AI say that long straight hair doesn't go well with oblong faces but I personally love it. When a hairdresser did layers on it I hated it and it took a long time for it to grow again while cutting it so it's one length again. Also, one time I had my hair trimmed they cut way too much and it hurt me again. It took a long time for me to feel ok again. So now I trim it at home.
When I wear some tight fitting clothes (like a thermal shirt) and, let my hair untied and look at my reflection I think "damn girl you look good". It's a great feeling that boosts my self esteem, as stupid as it may sound.

[Paulie]

Umm my bad. I checked and it's actually 2 years not 1 (injections) HRT. I've accepted though that I'm not going to get any more growth than aa/a . Poor genetics I guess+ athletic built (roughly 6 feet /160 pounds) . It's just that I think I look 100% male. Of course it's the body hair / facial hair shadow too. Maybe eyebrow shaping could help too.

Hi Kelly,

I've been on HRT for about 2 years 9 months give or take.  Towards the last half of the first year I had modest breast growth.  It looked very promising, then it just stopped.  The first sign was that my breasts were no longer tender.

We (my GP and I) made a change of my meds about a year and a half ago with no change. 

About 6 months ago we made another change to my meds and I've seen some very good results since then.  The second, third and fourth months on the new meds were the most productive and although things seemed to have slowed some, my breasts are still somewhat tender.  I'm a very healthy B, possibly a B+ at present.  Hopping I can achieve at least a healthy C when all is said and done.  (Really I hopping for more.)

I have a very similar build to what you described, 6 foot, 155lbs and an athletic build.  I did a lot of mountaineering in my 40s and 50s.  My weight has fluctuated by 5lbs over the past almost 3 years with no fat redistribution what so ever.  Perhaps my weight changes were not dramatic enough for redistribution.  It's always been around my mid section. 

Your lack of development might be genetics, but maybe not.  Work with you GP or your endocrinologist on adjustments to you HRT.  I think it too early for you to write off further breast development.  Others have mentioned that development is not uncommon after 3 to 4 years and that's been my experience.  So hang in there, you may have to try a few different changes to you HRT but you'll never know what you can achieve until you try.

Best wishes.
Paulie.

[Kelly_1979]

Well we experimented with different dosages. Sometimes we would overshoot e2 levels so he told me to reduce the dosage. ONLY during the first 4 months I had tender breasts. Since then nothing. I tried cycling the dosage but no change. So for now I've settled to a dosage that keeps testosterone suppressed and e2 at ok levels.

I mean some more growth would be great but I don't want to keep my hopes up. At least my Endo told me I'm done growing.

Edit (AGAIN) just measured myself using abrathatfits.org and I'm apparently 36A/B not AA...

Current measurements (just measured using a tape:

42 shoulders (measured by seamstress)
36a/b bra size
31.2 waist
39 hips
7 Wrist perimeter
6 ft
162 lb

What do you think? Are these ok sizes? I mean common for tall, athletic women?

[Northern Star Girl ✅]

  @Kelly_1979
Dear Kelly:
I am thrilled to see that you were able to get your member account back again...
              WELCOME BACK

As you are most likely aware, the site experienced a site crash on January 1st in 2024 and much
data was lost including member accounts, postings, private messaging, etc.

Through what seemed to be endless work, our staff has done a great job in piecing things
together again to very quickly have a fully operation site even though much of the lost
data appears to be unrecoverable. 

Some things have changed here on the Forum since you were last here... you should
read a couple announcements that were posted after the crash:

                  The New Years Outage and our Lost years
              https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,246809.0.html

                    The "NEW" updated Forum
              https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247170.0.html 

            Important Update: Revising Our Language Moderation Guidelines
                https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247169.0.html
           
              The Foul Language and Respectful Communication Policy
                https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,247168.0.html

... and be certain to read the revised and updated Terms of Service rules for the site.
              As we embark on this new chapter, we urge all returning members to familiarize themselves
              with our updated Terms of Service (TOS), which are vital for maintaining a respectful,
              inclusive, and safe environment for everyone.
You can review the new TOS here: 
              Susan's Place: Community Guidelines and Terms of Service
            --> https://www.susans.org/index.php/topic,2.0.html

If you have any questions regarding the Forum please feel free to
send a Forum private message to me or you can Email me at alaskandanielle@yahoo.com

Many HUGS, and a BIG warm WELCOME back.
Danielle [Northern Star Girl]
The Forum Administrator.

cc:  @Devlyn  @Lori Dee  @Sarah B  @Jessica_Rose  @Mariah  @Charlotte_Ringwood

[Kelly_1979]

Thank you Danielle! No I didn't know about the site. I just saw.

I know I'm repeating myself, but I've reached a point where after shaving and wearing the right clothes, I don't get hate what I see in the mirror. In fact, I actually like it.

Still a LONG way to go, but it's ok.

Edit: just saw, we are the same age!

[Paulie]

Hi Kelly,

The only measurement I can recall off hand is my bra size, it's a 38A. Even though I measure 37.5 under and 40 over the 38A fits well. 

I'm out of town until tomorrow evening so I can't confirm any of my other measurements.  I don't think my hip are as big as your's and I think my wrist might be smaller.  But I think your larger hips would lend itself to a more womanly figure.  Personally I feel I'm weak in the hip and bottom area.


When I get back on Wednesday, I have to pack for another trip on Thursday. If I have time I'll try to get my other measurements just out of curiosity, since we are about the same height and weight.  As far as your measurements compared to an average tall woman, I can't really say since I have no experience visualize body dimensions. 

For a lot of us how we dress is more Important the body shape.  There is some very good information in some of the past chats.

I'll try to fill you in on how I jump started my second spirt some time next week.

Warm Regards,
Paulie

[Stottie Girl]

Well we experimented with different dosages. Sometimes we would overshoot e2 levels so he told me to reduce the dosage. ONLY during the first 4 months I had tender breasts. Since then nothing. I tried cycling the dosage but no change. So for now I've settled to a dosage that keeps testosterone suppressed and e2 at ok levels.

I mean some more growth would be great but I don't want to keep my hopes up. At least my Endo told me I'm done growing.

Edit (AGAIN) just measured myself using abrathatfits.org and I'm apparently 36A/B not AA...

Current measurements (just measured using a tape:

42 shoulders (measured by seamstress)
36a/b bra size
31.2 waist
39 hips
7 Wrist perimeter
6 ft
162 lb

What do you think? Are these ok sizes? I mean common for tall, athletic women?

Looking at those measurments and the hip to upper body in particular I would say you are looking like pretty close to a pear shape. Whilst some CIS women wouldn't like it and would prefer to be hourglass I would kill for that as I think it's very womanly! I'm more of an apple shape due to waist fat:(

[Kelly_1979]

Looking at those measurments and the hip to upper body in particular I would say you are looking like pretty close to a pear shape. Whilst some CIS women wouldn't like it and would prefer to be hourglass I would kill for that as I think it's very womanly! I'm more of an apple shape due to waist fat:(

Actually I'm more of an inverted triangle. Hips aren't that big but I have a big butt (cycling, squats etc plus fat). My breasts aren't really visible when I wear clothes, unless it's some tight Lycra or other tight clothing.