Who should make the first move ?

[beckster]

Heya Everyone,

I was talking with the girls in work yesterday about if I should ask out this guy I had been talking with online for the last 3 or 4 weeks.  We started off emailing each other and over the last week have been texting each other quite a lot. He seems really nice although he does work unsociable hours with his job, he sent me some more pics of himself at the weekend and he is one sexy guy !!  He has asked me quite a few times what I am up to at the weekend or during the week, sometimes I have been busy but when I haven't been I have kinda dropped subtle hints that I am doing nothing but fancy going out.  He is yet to ask me out, either he isn't interested, isn't getting the hint I want him to ask me out or is just to nervous to ask.

So, should a girl make the first move and ask a guy out ?  Or should she wait ? Just curious what everyone thinks ?

Becky
xx

[Hazumu]

Hi, Becky;

I voted [does it really matter?], but only because it depends on the individuals.  When I was in denial, my partners (women) would almost always make the first move, even if they made it look like I had made the first move.  So, what's the answer?

Karen

[RuthChambers]

Jane Austin in "Pride and Prejudice" (brilliant BBC adaptation) showed in the relationship between Jane Bennet and Mr Bingley that a woman should make her feelings very clear or risk loosing him.

So I would suggest some unsubtle hints, like telling him your favourite restaurant !!!

Good luck

Ruth

[Suzy]

I'd say be a lot less subtle.  If you like the guy, why not tell him you'll be at "X" place at a certain date and time.  Ask him if he'd like to come along. 

Keep us nosy sisters informed, Becky!
Kristi

[Dennis]

From the guy's point of view, I'd find it refreshing being asked out by a woman. Go for it, I say.

Dennis

[Lucy]

To quote nike 'JUST DO IT'

[Melissa]

One secret I have found is that if you express your feeling about being attracted to someone, that gives you a HUGE advantage because just the fact that someone is attracted to a person makes them attractive.

Melissa

[Rachel]

i say as long as he isnt overly chivalristic that would be a wonderfull to ask him out

[Cindi Jones]

News flash...

From the news room of Cindi Jones...

We now go to Cindi Jones....

   "Yes, I am sad to report that Queen Victoria is still dead.
    Live from Cindi Jones Central, this is Cindi Jones."



Cindi

[Casey]

The one who doesn't want to "lose" the other one should make the first move.

[tinkerbell]

If a girl likes a guy then why shouldn't she make the first move ?

Exactly my feelings!  >

tink

P.S.  and yes times have changed, and we're not living in the middle ages anymore.

[beckster]

Morning Everyone !!

Thanks for all your thoughts, I eventually plucked up the courage and I asked him would he like to go out on Saturday and he said no.  However, he did go on to say that he is free on Sunday and Monday so we can get to together on one of those days, so looks like I have a date on Sunday !!  Just need to work out when and where now 

Becky
xx

[Cindi Jones]

<grin>

See? Aren'tchya glad you asked him?  Ya jus nevah no.....

cindi

[tinkerbell]

Morning Everyone !!

Thanks for all your thoughts, I eventually plucked up the courage and I asked him would he like to go out on Saturday and he said no.  However, he did go on to say that he is free on Sunday and Monday so we can get to together on one of those days, so looks like I have a date on Sunday !!  Just need to work out when and where now 

Becky
xx

Good morning....it is 1:49 here in Utopia.....Way to go, Becky!  is he cute?  com'on, tell me, tell me, tell me.....LOL

tink

[Cindi Jones]

Of course he's cute!  ya think that the Beckster would hang out with anyone else?

But Beckster, you do have to tell us about the details.  REALLY.

Cindi

[beckster]

Good morning....it is 1:49 here in Utopia.....Way to go, Becky!  is he cute?  com'on, tell me, tell me, tell me.....LOL

tink

Of course he's cute!  ya think that the Beckster would hang out with anyone else?

But Beckster, you do have to tell us about the details.  REALLY.

Cindi

Cute is not the word with this guy, he is amazing looking - I get all hot and bothered just thinking about him !!  I have met guys when I have been out and have even been on dates before, but have never been this nervous about going on a date and neither have I felt this attracted to a guy before.  Hopefully his personality is going to be just as good as his looks and we will have a really good day out with each other.  Just waiting for him to get back in touch to say he is deffo okay for Sunday now, so we will see how things go.

Becky
xx

[RuthChambers]

As I said last night I suggest you propose a time to meet up at the coffee shop at the Cheshire Oaks mall http://www.cheshireoaksdesigneroutlet.com/consumer.asp?url=mcarthurglen.com That way if you are waiting for him you can have a coffee and read a magazine !!!

If he doesnt show up you can go shopping.

If he shows up and is minging then you can make your excuses and go shopping.

If he is as cute as you say then enjoy the rest of your day .......

Good luck Becks, I hope it works out for you. I will be thinking of you. If you need help, call Aunty Ruth

[littlegreenfly]

I like Kristi's approach as well.... and Ruth's suggestion of the mall.  I almost never mind an excuse to go shopping....    LGF

[InMyWrittenHeart]

Yes

[Natkat]

just hit my head for a second.
if only its okay for guys to ask someone out and girls should wait then what about the gays,

the 2 girls would wait for each other forever, and the 2 guys would go bump into each other with the "date me" attack.
LOL..
I got a sick mind..

anyway.. I dont think it matter whenever its a guy or a girl to make the first step, actually I think it would be sorta nice not to feel forced into nessesarry doing the first move. So if you want just go for it.