i disagree on your first point there. whether i am the most confident woman in the world who wouldn't give a damn what anybody called me, or whether i am the most inward wreck who would die if somebody was to suggest i wasn't perfect... either way, doesn't make the slightest bit of difference to what somebody thinks when they hear the word ">-bleeped-<".
on your second point... well, taking a word and removing the sting from it is one way of doing things, but it's seldom the most practical. should we call each other "c***s" in an attempt to remove the personal sting from that word? i don't think so. in most cases, i think that the thing of taking the sting out of a word is rathermuch the scenic route if you will, and the thing of trying to get people to use words that are good and descriptive, with no sting attached, instead, is a much better plan (ie. "t-girl" or "t-boy"... they are fine).
what you know yourself to be is more important than what others see you as, but nevertheless what others see you as still remains mighty important, if we are each to live in a world occupied by said others.
i don't know quite what you meant by "the rainbow". i'm guessing, it means the "spectrum of gender / sexuality issues" and the way they are often grouped. if i'm wrong with that guess then please correct me. otherwise, i would say this: i personally disagree with the wide grouping on a moral basis, but on a practical basis, accept it as necessary, and thustowards, am not begrudging of it. i didn't mean to give the impression i might begrudge it.
if my assumption of the meaning of "the rainbow" was correct, that might give me an idea of what you were saying about your comment when you told me to be "careful with that". i didn't mean to stir up emotion, and if i did, then it was as only a side-effect to the actual meaning, which was only to try and describe the misconnections of the prejudice we encounter. whatever you think, having people believe that a transvestite is the same as a transsexual isn't good for any of us. it isn't good for a transvestite and it isn't good for a transsexual. sure we can attend groups together and call each other transgendered as an umbrella term, because that's a practical way of coming together to solve many problems each of us have that do happen to be of similar natures. but i don't think i'm going to offend anyone by suggesting that it's not good for people to think both categories are the same. and if i do offend anyone, then i apologise, but with that, please expain how and why, so that i can learn from it.
i also strongly disagree that it's only you who can change peoples' conceptions of what you are. that is something that you can do, sure, but it's not the only thing. the mass media changes a lot of peoples' conceptions of what a lot of people are, and lots of the time people can't reasonably be expected to be able to counteract all that mud-slinging by themselves. anybody can change somebody's opinion of anybody. there's no bad thing about trying to influence other people to give yourself a good image. that's just part of how it all works.
it is a lot about being confident in yourself, but it isn't "all" about that. whatever you think, we each have to live in this world. and if all and sundry think we're perverts, and we don't care about what any of them think, sooner or later they are going to think they are justified in their misconceptions and seek to distroy us, which is kinda what's already happening. besides which, i do care if somebody else thinks that of me, regardless of whether or not they'd have the influence or the will to do anything about it.
