I had a horrible dream this morning. It was sort of a dream within a dream. I dreamt i was dreaming that i had srs and it was a horrible thing like i lost an arm or something. Then still within the dream, i woke up, and realized it wasn't just a dream and i in fact had the surgery. I was TERRIFIED, floored, shocked,scared,angry and it was all because of the overwhelming idea that this was forever and i could never go back. What had i done to myself? Then i woke up for real. Back to reality. After a few minutes of consciousness, my desire to have a vagina is as strong as ever. WTF!!!!!!!!
I should add that my desire to transition only ever goes away for 10 minutes after i masturbate and in this dream. Otherwise, its is always with me. That's why i dont understand a dream like this. I've had it like twice before.
Edited inappropriate language.
