I thought I'd post an update to tell everyone how I'm doing since last post 4 years ago:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,171648.msg1501220.htmlI got a lot of flak from people on this board when I initially posted the above topic in the HRT section of the board and was told it was going to be moved to the Non-Binary portion of the board. Thinking back, ativan's long post in the previous topic explained things very well. Gender dysphoria presents different challenges to different people and people approach the problem differently. I've continued to tackle my problem in a different way that others haven't.
I've continued to cycle on and off. It involves a certain dose of medroxyprogesterone and estrace. No anti-androgens. The medroxyprogesterone at a certain dose brings your testosterone down to minimal levels. It's been 8 years. I'm happy, confident, and successful in life. It has been a great coping mechanism, which has allowed me to tackle issues in my life with a clearer head.
I still present as male. I did not socially transition, but my body to a degree has feminized. My face looks like a male as it's less sensitive to the hormones. I'm successful at my job. I found a female partner who is understanding (I disclosed to her my condition at the beginning of the relationship before we got physical). I'm getting married soon.
I've worked hard to work out my issues and I am capable of helping others now with their emotional issues. I have learned to love myself, which is key because you treat other like how you treat yourself. I have adopted best practices derived from modern psychology when trying to tackle problems. I found core principles/concepts on how to life through and become emotionally mature (google any of them):
- 5 Problem Solving Methods
- Emotional Bank Account
- Abundance/Scarcity Perspective
- Arguing Fairly
- Leading by Example
- Active Listening
- Emotional Regulation
I have identified patterns of behaviour (see books like "Dance of Anger" and "Hold me Tight" which are best sellers on amazon). Overall, I have become adept at processing my thoughts and experiences so that I can come up with solutions quickly. I have tackled problems head on and solved them as fast as I could so I don't have problems lingering in my life. By solving problems as fast as I can and building my capacity to handle other problems, gender dysphoria became easier to handle as it wasn't debilitating as before as I had excess capacity to deal with it. I have built up life skills so my life isn't as stressful. I raised myself since I was a kid since my parents weren't around.
Personally, I think the WPATH standard of care is too strict on certain aspects. Some practitioners have been hostile to me as a result, which was sometimes more revealing about themselves than me. Emotionally mature practitioners have been helpful, but there are less emotionally mature practitioners that don't like deviating from the WPATH standard of care due to legal issues.
I just want to say to others on here and treatment providers reading this, there isn't one way to solve the problem of gender dysphoria. It is logical and worth while to assist individuals suffering from gender dysphoria to remain presenting in their birth gender because of practicalities in life. One size does not fit all as we're all unique with our own set of circumstances. I can say this: Find your own path and explore what works for you. Of course, I had the help of doctors on the way and I've been lucky to be in a city that has knowledgeable doctors on gender dysphoria.
