Hi there Emma. I know what you're going through, as I did some years ago myself, with my wife of over three decades. My coming out was by accident, and was a shock to us both. I won't go into the details of how this came about, but let me cut to the chase. It was difficult for us both. We remained together as an intimate couple, came out to the family and church and work, some of which was a disaster. We led a very happy life until her passing several years ago. One of her favorite things to say was, "The more I talk to my married friends, the more I appreciate having a wife"
So, everyone's mileage varies, and back when I came out, around twenty four years ago, it was generally more difficult socially. Only you can make decisions of this nature, and I would not base them on other peoples' experiences. It's good to have some notion, though, of how it turned out for some of us. I know more people it didn't work out for than people it did. My heart goes out to you, and I wish you all the best in your journey