I'm on the verge of actually coming out now...

[Linde]

https://youtube.com/watch?v=OSrg2eu85Dc
So I saw my psychiatrist today. I'm going to get vocal therapy and hair removal from them. Maybe someone to talk to there as well. I also got my eyebrows done today. Went outside with makeup on for the first time so that was a big step. Right now I'm having dinner with my grandmother and I still have my makeup on. She hasn't said anything about it though.

I think you look darn good as a girl!  Your eyebrows look nice and I can't see any unusual brow ridge (I specifically blew the picture up and looked for it)  I think you have a very feminin looking nose and chin/jaw line.  You did a really good ob with your scar, and I bet if somebody would not loo fr it, they would not even see it!

Go girl, you are pretty!

[930310]

So this last week I've started wearing makeup when I have been with relatives. My dad thought I looked like a raccoon so he can go screw himself or something. My grandmother and her sister compared me to this dude: https://img.koket.se/mediachef/rickard-soderberg.jpg so I don't if that's a result of me failing miserably with my makeup or something. Everyone still calls me "he," "him" or "man" so I am obviously doing something wrong. People that I don't know when I'm outside also refers to me with a male pronoun so obviously I am not passing. It is really disconcerting but at least I am gathering experience and some courage as well because nobody has attacked me or harassed me yet.
This is how I looked when I was with my grandmother today:


And today's vocal training:

[930310]

An update since getting back home from France:
France was lovely, I loved how people referred to me as "mademoiselle/madame" but hated how my father corrected these people that I was male.
I have not received the same positive treatment back in Sweden. Nobody calls me "she" or "her" here when they talk about or to me. I guess that it's because all of these people know me as a male so they choose to ignore the fact that I'm wearing makeup.
I felt quite a bit of dysphoria around lunch today and felt that I looked like an ogre. I handled this by going to a second hand store and buying my first female piece of clothing in person. None of the clerks said anything when I bought it, so I don't know if I passed or not...
Anyway, here are today's videos: