A day in the life of Jessica_k

[Jessica_K]

Little continuation from yesterday. I was in work Wednesday and met the HR director (a friend) for the first time of a long time due to illness. We had a good natter. She is very supportive of me and one of the very few that know I am trans as I transitioned at my place of work. Natural wastage and a break of a couple of years means that the few left either forgot or do not care.

Anyway during the day she asked in front of CFO too, could she call me Jess. This friendly btw. I instantly said yes. Now I have always been a bit cautious about using Jess due to its neutral status. Using my full name underlines my gender. But I am really confident now of my gender Jess is good.

Jess 💜

[Jessica_K]

Merry Christmas everyone.

This year is coming to an end and I am reflecting on all that has happened as I start my 8th year of being Jess. I'm not going to bore everyone with a long post more add a few highlights.

This I say has been my best year ever. Moving away and starting again at the end of Jan has transformed my life. Although I had been "full time" for many years before I moved I always had to change back at home often in my car lol

Now real full time and fully stealth I'm the girl in the big house that everybody knows. I have had total acceptance as the woman I am locally.

I have made many friends that this Christmas time meant many dinners out
Locals dinner, dinner at a friends house where I got cooked a lovely dinner, ladies group dinner, and family birthday dinner, to name a few.

I have met and live with Rez who is a very big part of my life now. He is a work in progress getting him out of his shell. I'm not changing him that's impossible but I am showing him he does not have to be alone anymore and introduce him to some of the simple good things of life.

I'll finish on two more things one good and one....
The good one. I am after 5.5 years waiting within a few months of starting the NHS journey that hopefully will get me surgery. I have completed the preliminary assessment form and according to the posted stats they are seeing for first appointment those one month before me, though that was set in October it will be very soon (I calculated I must be at the very top now)

The ... one, I had to "boy mode" to see my grandson yesterday, he is no longer allowed to visit me incase I infect him with transsexualism according to his father. The seeing my grandson was wonderful but the atmosphere not so even my daughter was not the same. I did my best to be as "male" as I can be. But I was not going to take my lovely red nails off and hiding my boobs was impossible, nor was my longer hair and earring ( only one as I lost the hole. Long story). When we were at the sports centre to watch Isaac (GS) play in a tennis tournament I was not allowed to go into the female changing room, though 9 year old Isaac was, to go to the loo but instead directed by my daughter to the disabled toilets. Up side I was talking to some other mums in shelter out of the -2c winds and was told it was nice to see a grandma here to support their grandson.

Anyway this is longer than I intended so I say happy Christmas again to all.

Jess xx

[davina61]

Merry Christmas, well its them that have the problem and its their lose. Good the hear you are doing well XXX

[Northern Star Girl ✅]

  @Jessica_K

Dear Jessica:
I very much enjoyed your last reply comment and posting.

Your "8th year" of transitioning and you are now experiencing your "best year ever."

I agree with you about what made that happen for you... relocating and starting over
to a place will you where only know as a woman...  I've done that myself and it
is the best thing that happened to me as well.

I likewise have a significant other, she is known as my Tooth Fairy... she is the
Dental Hygienist I met when I moved here and went to my small town dentist.

I am so happy for you and I am very glad that you are now back on the Forum and
on your Blog sharing about your life adventures.

HUGS, and my best wishes to you.... and Merry Christmas
Danielle [Northern Star Girl]
The Forum Administrator

[Jessica_K]

OMG!!!!

I called the gender clinic this morning as I have been waiting 2 months for the website to change from seeing people referred jun 2020 to Jul when I was referred and wanted to know when I was likely to be seen. I was told to email the referrals team and got back that it would be early March.

Disappointing, but at least I knew. A few hours later I got another email can I accept a video appointment tomorrow at 11am!!!!

I am so pleased. At last I will be in the system after waiting so long. I'm so excited. I thought this day would never come

[davina61]

Good news my dear, in theory it should be quick now.

[Dances With Trees]

that's wonderful news, Jessica! I look forward to an update regarding your appointment.

[Pema]

That's fantastic, Jessica. Congratulations. The wait is finally over.

[Jessica_K]

I had my appointment and it wasn't as I expected

So what did I expect. I suppose the least i expected was with a nurse just taking information. The best for a first NHS appointment was to get a diagnosis.

But neither it was with a psychologist. It was a first referral for surgery. WHAT!!!!

I was not prepared for that but it became obvious she had already decided to write the referral and just needed the boxes ticked.

So 1 down, 1 to go. The doc during the appointment called up the appointments manager to get me an urgent second appointment possibly with 2 months. So with a fair wind I could be under the knife within 6months to a year.

This is amazing.

Jess xx

[Lori Dee ✅]

Wow, Jessica! That is great news.

I think I would have expected the same as you. Just basic information, then we will call you for your next appointment. That they are ready to make a referral for you is amazing! Congrats!

🥳🥂

[Sarah B ✅]

Hi Jessica

❤️🎁🎊🎉🎉🎉💕💕🎉🎉🎉🎊🎁❤️

OMG!

❤️🎁🎊🎉🎉🎉💕💕🎉🎉🎉🎊🎁❤️

All your dreams and wishes are coming true!!

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Jessica_K

[Charlotte_Ringwood]

Congratulations and glad it went so smoothly. A step closer 🙂😻

[davina61]

See I told you it would be quick, that was the way it went for me. Just make sure your BMI is okay and you should be good to go, that 6 months will fly by!!

[Jessica_K]

Thanks Davina, I have to work on my BMI, need to loose 10kg. Xx

[Jessica_K]

It's just unbelievable the effect this has had on my mental well being. I was not fully aware how depressed I have been over the last year. With no knowledge when I would be seen for so many years.

I was not finding a good reason to continue living. Don't get me wrong I was never thinking of doing anything silly just that I was going through the motions every day and was not worried if anything happened. Then bam a very dense cloth has been raised. I'm seeing everything so differently. I have such a huge reason to live now.

I really wish the controllers of the NHS knew the effect of their actions to people's mental heath, and I thought I'm strong.

[Dances With Trees]

Congratulations Jessica K! I am so glad you're seeing a much brighter future and much sooner than you anticipated.