Life Of Michelle K

[Lori Dee ✅]

Having the MRI done at the VA was to get the VA involved, and get a second opinion.

Having a second opinion is never a bad idea, especially with the VA. The more eyes that can look at the situation, the better.

[Michelle_K]

Things seem to change as I continue to read. I have read about amputees having phantom limbs, but never considered estrogen working on the brain to give phantom female organs. I assume that KS was Klinefelter syndrome, as it was mentioned KS sometimes causes phantom female organs. The forum also mentioned the other way, testosterone giving phantom male organs.

To my brain, it doesn't matter if the female organs are real or phantom. The pain is still real, the cramps causing me to run to the restroom. I have never been on hormone therapy, nor did I know how the body would react to estrogen therapy. To me it was normal that once a month I would put band aids over sensitive nipples, knowing that it was not normal for a normal male.
Watching a video about how the estrogen changes things, it was mentioned that this person could now smell the other person's menstrual blood. It now makes me wonder if that might have been what I smelled seated next to a woman as we stuffed envelopes for mailing. Or the person next to me asking if I had a box (Vagina). I would not have had the odor of a male. I had never really considered that the use of men's deodorant would cover up my feminine odor, or that I had a feminine odor. My mother on the other hand, had very sensitive smelling. The perfume smell from my magazines was so bad that it irritated her nose. I now think it was just to get me to stop reading those magazines, when there was no perfume smell.
Michelle

[Lori Dee ✅]

That is not how phantom limb pain works. I had a hypnotherapy client who suffered from phantom limb pain.

The subconscious mind stores a map of the body. When a limb is amputated, it takes time for the brain to adjust the map to account for what is now missing. Over time, the mind remaps the body so it knows where everything is.

Hormones do not cause phantom organs or sensations of organs that were never there.

[Michelle_K]

I would have been about 3 years old. At this time it would be about 6 months past when my only sibling (a girl) died as an infant. That is one big doll. At some point the doll disappeared. I can only speculate that one of my parents had convinced me that I only dreamed I had this big doll, that it never existed. Decades later, when I asked my mother about the doll, I got told that I never had this doll. The photo shows otherwise. Maybe my dad had convinced my mother that I did not have the doll. Simple jealousy? Steal the doll from me and then pretend that his parents gave the doll to him?

[Michelle_K]

I had accidentally signed in for only a hour, and made sure I posted before the hour was up and I got bumped off the forum.

I heard a lot of complaints about when my dad was born, his parents wanted a girl. He was not loved because he was not a girl. Then to take things that his mother might have given me, and claim that his mother gave the things to him.
The other scenario would be to pretend that my sister had not died and doll had belonged to my sister.

To take the doll away from me because I was a boy, and boys don't play with dolls, and then just put the doll away in the workshop does not make any sense. To top that there was also a drawer in the parts cabinet in the work shop that held the jewelry that I played with.

Decades ago I would have dreams where I would go through closets looking for a special doll, and never find the doll. Just a few days ago I had another dream where I was looking for a special doll.
Michelle

[Michelle_K]

I sometimes feel like I'm going crazy. I was searching all over yesterday for a stapler. This morning I find a stapler sitting right next to my coffee cup. I might have found it sooner if I had realized I was looking for a pink stapler.

I was checking google maps for the proper distance to Dollar General, and the post office. It looks like I need to do some zig-zag walking to make it a full mile to Dollar General. The post office is on my route and ends up being a half mile. I had checked my time walking the round trip to the post office and making an adjustment to the actual distance, it looks like my walking speed is 2 miles per hour. Walking any faster will cause a lot of lung pain, but then it might be not getting enough air through my nose.
Michelle

[Lori Dee ✅]

I sometimes feel like I'm going crazy. I was searching all over yesterday for a stapler. This morning I find a stapler sitting right next to my coffee cup. I might have found it sooner if I had realized I was looking for a pink stapler.

This happens to me a lot.

I blame the gremlins. I imagine them moving things so I won't find them, then when I give up, they put them back where they were. I yell at them to stop moving my stuff!

😆

[Dawn Kellie]

I hate the gremlins. I've spent half an hour looking for tools that I had just had in my hand. Then I turn away from my tool box and turn around and it's sitting there.

[Michelle_K]

I popped a button off my skirt, and found it later. Later I accidentally knocked it off my desk. All the cleaning I have done, and I still haven't found it. I have moved all kinds of stuff, No button, but I did find a Starbucks card. If the button bounced, it may be sitting in the bottom of the printer cart, with the old iPads and keyboard share wiring.

Something that was said on a video, that my searching for information about transgender is enough proof that I am transgender. Can the same be said about being intersex?

I guess it could be called bi-gender, kind of a belief that I was both sexes. I just happen to be a girl with male parts. Me faint, don't be ridiculous, only girls faint. I just black out from standing up to fast. Took a while to find it, racoon eyes caused by the same cause as blacking out. Sorry if things seem to be disconnected. It's just that I might have been considered extremely clumsy, that I would grow out of it. The other thing in the photo is my tongue hanging out, I can't get enough air through my nose, or an enlarged tongue. I didn't see the dog until I scanned at a higher resolution.
Michelle