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Charlotte's gender perspectives

Started by Charlotte_Ringwood, October 28, 2025, 05:17:37 PM

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Charlotte_Ringwood

Well today I ended up feeling really good. Went to a furry meet which was very busy with a lot of new faces too.

Lots of interaction in fursuits which itself was special, connecting with so many other furs. But also no less then 5 people referred to me as beautiful or gorgeous with particular reference to my presentation as a women. I know that internal affirmation is most important, but still felt special being called these terms by others. Feels like my efforts are being noticed.

Charlotte 😻


HRT: since April 2025 DIY
Furry crew: old Raveronomy, Skittles, Serana, Cupcake and Creamy
House music producer.
Design Engineer.

Northern Star Girl

Charlotte_Ringwood
Dear Charlotte:

YES indeed, there is nothing more affirming than getting those kinds of
positive public declarations of how you nicely appear as the woman you are. 

A smart girl always accepts those kinds of compliments. 

When it happens to me I always respond with a smile and a thank you.

Thank you for sharing and posting... please keep sharing your updates.

HUGS, Danielle[Northern Star Girl]
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Charlotte_Ringwood

Fighting the passport office right now! To change my gender marker I'm meant to have either a GRC or letter from a registered UK  medical professional e.g. GP saying my gender change is likely to be permanent. I'm on at least a 5 year wait for referral to the GIC and my GP won't write the letter as apart from referring me has not been involved in my gender journey. Honestly they don't really have to be involved to write it, but being a brick wall.

Others have managed to get their marker changed by affirming their transition is likely to be permanent themselves by letter. I've done this already. Now awaiting a call back as to if it's been accepted. Was meant to be yesterday 😥
HRT: since April 2025 DIY
Furry crew: old Raveronomy, Skittles, Serana, Cupcake and Creamy
House music producer.
Design Engineer.

Lori Dee

I hope they accept it and get it done for you.

Here in the U.S., the rules are slightly different and continue to change. The standard letter must come from a healthcare provider, and they must be able to state that they know you and you are or were a patient of theirs. The letter doesn't state any permanency, nor details about what was done. It just says that < name > has undergone necessary clinical procedures to change gender from male to female. At the time of my letter, all I had done was complete a year of HRT, but that was enough for my endocrinologist to sign the letter. I was prepared to get similar letters from my Primary Physician, my Psychologist, and my Gynecologist, but it turned out to be unnecessary. One letter was enough.

I am wondering if you have other providers who might be willing to sign a letter, just in case your letter gets rejected?
My Life is Based on a True Story <-- The Story of Lori
The Story of Lori, Chapter 2
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Charlotte_Ringwood

Quote from: Lori Dee on November 19, 2025, 11:07:56 AMI am wondering if you have other providers who might be willing to sign a letter, just in case your letter gets rejected?


Hi Lori,
Thanks for your reply and info on the US system. It sounds to have similar limitations to the UK.

Unfortunately I'm currently DIY until I can get a GIC appointment in about 5 years or more! The doctors however do know I'm self medicating. Apart from very expensive private there is little other option due to the waiting list situation.

Charlotte 😻
HRT: since April 2025 DIY
Furry crew: old Raveronomy, Skittles, Serana, Cupcake and Creamy
House music producer.
Design Engineer.

Sarah B

Hi Charlotte

Introduction (My Case)
I have a current British passport.  I originally let my first one lapse and I needed to get a current one to become a teacher where I live.  The following are things that helped me get it. I used a professional consultant at ukpassportsmail dot com and I think I paid about $600 dollars or £300.

The following items were used to identify me.
  • Birth certificate
  • Change of Name document (Deed poll)
  • My surgery letter confirmation (I had the surgery)
  • My old passport
  • A bank statement (instead of a utility bill)
  • An identity document form saying who I was (my doctor, who had known me for more than 10 years, verified my identity)

I did try to apply for my GRC 16 years ago, long story short it was rejected. They were being gatekeepers to put it mildly.  I had no psych papers saying I suffered from dysphoria and even my surgery letter was not good enough, yeah tell me that is not gate keeping.

Anyway I have put together some thoughts for you to consider, however you will need to verify what I have mentioned and obviously I'm not an expert.

Minimal accepted evidence for a British citizen (renewal or new passport)
  • Completed adult passport renewal application (online renewal or paper form).
  • Current UK passport (or most recent if you have one).
  • One original from HM Passport Office's accepted list for gender change, for example an original signed letter from a UK registered doctor or consultant on clinic letterhead stating your gender has changed and is likely to be permanent; include clinician name, GMC / registration number, contact details and date.
  • Maybe birth certificate and other current documentation in your current name.
  • If you changed your name, evidence of name change (deed poll or marriage or civil partnership certificate).
  • One compliant passport photo.
  • Payment for the renewal fee.

Change of name in England
  • Private deed poll (simple method): draft using GOV UK wording or a commercial service; sign in presence of an independent witness (18+) who also signs. Provide copies of the original deed poll to organisations when updating records.
  • Marriage or civil partnership certificate, used to change surname.

Driver's licence update name and gender
  • Apply to DVLA to update your name (online or by post) and supply original deed poll or marriage certificate if requested.
  • To update gender, supply one original from the same evidence used for the passport application such as a medical letter confirming your change of gender is likely to be permanent or a reissued birth or adoption certificate. This should be the same evidence you intend to rely on for your passport so DVLA and HM Passport Office records stay consistent.
  • DVLA will issue a replacement licence showing updated name and gender.

Visiting a private therapist for the required letter
  • Choose a UK-registered clinician (GMC for psychiatrists, HCPC for psychologists or other relevant regulator).
  • Book an assessment (often 1 session, sometimes 2).
  • Request an original signed letter on practice letterhead including: clinician name, registration number, contact details, assessment date(s) and an explicit statement that change of gender is likely to be permanent.
  • Typical private wait times (minimal estimates, these vary by clinician and clinic): urgent clinics 1 to 7 days; standard private practice 1 to 4 weeks; high-demand specialists 4 to 12 plus weeks.
  • Actions to speed process: search clinicians who explicitly issue passport, GRC letters; prioritise UK-registered professionals; phone clinics for earliest slots and cancellation lists; request that the letter contain all HMPO-required details.
  • Note: GIC (NHS) waits commonly approximately 3 to 5 years. Adding passport processing may add another year. Private route is usually much faster.

Practical notes
  • HM Passport Office reviews medical letters case-by-case; originals preferred.  If HMPO does not accept the medical letter, they may request a Gender Recognition Certificate.  The GRC remains the definitive legal route.
  • Send copies of the originals certified by an appropriate person, such as solicitors (practising), notaries public, court staff or similar.
  • If changing both name and gender, include the original deed poll (or marriage certificate) plus the chosen gender evidence in the same passport application.
  • Originals of the single chosen evidence are required for the minimal route. HMPO may accept the medical letter alternative but retains discretion to request a GRC if evidence is insufficient.

Time to see a private therapist (minimal summary)
  • Urgent/expedited: 1 to 7 days
  • Standard private: 1 to 4 weeks
  • High-demand specialists: 4 to 12 plus weeks

GRC is not legally mandatory
A GRC is not strictly mandatory in every case. HM Passport Office accepts a GRC as definitive but will accept a single minimal alternative original such as a medical letter or a reissued birth or adoption certificate.  HM Passport Office may also consider a foreign passport as supporting evidence in some cases.  If alternatives are unavailable or rejected, a GRC remains the definitive legal document. You do not need a GRC to change your passport or driving licence.

Conclusion
Private therapist and assessment costs typically range from about £150 to £600 for a single assessment and passport / GRC-style letter (common prices approximately £150 to £400); initial consultations often cost £80 to £250 and follow ups £60 to £150. Deed poll costs are low or free if you draft your own using GOV UK wording, or about £10 to £50 for commercial services.

Waiting for NHS Gender Identity Clinic (GIC) referral or equivalent public pathway for assessment and treatment commonly takes around 3 to 5 years in many areas and adding further delays to obtain supporting documentation and a passport can make a multi-year wait (often a year or more) realistic for some people.  For most people seeking a faster, practical route, using a private UK registered clinician is quicker: you can often get seen within days or weeks, obtain an original signed letter that HM Passport Office will accept and in many cases arrange private prescriptions for hormones directly through the private clinician rather than waiting years for NHS services.

Take care and I hope the above information helps you in achieving what you want.

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Charlotte_Ringwood
Be who you want to be.
Sarah's Story
Feb 1989 Living my life as Sarah.
Feb 1989 Legally changed my name.
Mar 1989 Started hormones.
May 1990 Three surgery letters.
Feb 1991 Surgery.

Charlotte_Ringwood

Hey Sarah,
Thank you for the very thorough information you provided above. I have considered the private route as you mention. At this point though I'd be paying the c. £600 just to get a gender marker change on my passport as the medical side I have covered. I DIY my HRT for less than £10 a month. It's kind of the case that my transition is not formally on any medical records.

I think at the current levels even 5 years is optimistic to see NHS GIC. My friend waited over 5 years then a further year to second appointment. For me I'm only doing it incase my circumstances change e.g lose my income, then having NHS cover is critical. Also NHS can offer bottom surgery free.

The passport office called me and are reviewing my self declaration so I may get accepted yet. Others have in the past so not quite at a loss yet.

If they won't change my marker I'll cancel the application and keep my passport I have in my dead name. Technically going against my deed poll declaration, but I'm not bothered. I'm still Charlotte, that stuff is just admin so can ignore it.

As you mention GRC is a little more difficult. I'm still under 1 year in my new gender so a long way off qualifying yet. Not too bothered about a GRC. Would be nice but not critical.

Charlotte 😻
HRT: since April 2025 DIY
Furry crew: old Raveronomy, Skittles, Serana, Cupcake and Creamy
House music producer.
Design Engineer.

Lori Dee

I felt the same way about my birth certificate, college transcripts, military records, etc. I see them as historical documents that don't really have much of an impact on me today.

However, as Sarah was pointing out, these documents are all connected. It is wise to have as many changed as soon as possible, so that all of your records say the same thing. Here is my thinking on this.

I was stationed in Germany for five and a half years on my second tour. While there, I had a bank account, a car loan, insurance, etc. But when I returned to the States, I was told that I had no credit. All of my credit history had "fallen off" because I was living outside of the U.S. economy, even though I received government pay.

My legal name change was done on December 22, 2022, almost three years ago. In two more years, any credit history in my deadname will fall off, and only Lori Dee exists. Over time, government records get archived as well because only the most recent history is relevant to most agencies. As records get archived, they become harder to locate, can be destroyed, or go missing, etc.

So the more documents you have now pointing to Charlotte as a real person starts establishing that history. And when records like birth certificates, passports, driving licenses, and so on rely on each other for verification, it is a good thing to have a many in alignment as possible. That gives you options as to which ID you wish to present, and no eyebrows are raised due to a mismatch.

Just something to think about.
My Life is Based on a True Story <-- The Story of Lori
The Story of Lori, Chapter 2
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete - Started Electrolysis!

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Charlotte_Ringwood

Well unfortunately today after 2 weeks deliberation the passport office have rejected my passport gender change 😕 So got to try again to get the doctor to write a letter...plead to them. Or I keep my passport in my dead name and gender!

Tough after a week where I've had a total anxious breakdown at work after doing several 14 hour days, leading to me hurting myself significantly. It's feeling very dark right now. I feel the mist closing in from all angles. I just hope there is some light to come in this darkness.

Charlotte 😻
HRT: since April 2025 DIY
Furry crew: old Raveronomy, Skittles, Serana, Cupcake and Creamy
House music producer.
Design Engineer.
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Lori Dee

Charlotte,

I feel ya. Please don't hurt yourself. This is merely a momentary setback. Sometimes the Universe tests us to make us think more creatively to find a way around. This is not the end of the world.

Some doctors can and will help with the letter. You might need to schedule a couple of video appointments with them so they can truthfully state that you are their patient. Just because one doctor won't, doesn't mean that none will.

Hang in there. A solution will find its way to you.

As the saying goes, "This, too, shall pass."

Big Hugs!

My Life is Based on a True Story <-- The Story of Lori
The Story of Lori, Chapter 2
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete - Started Electrolysis!

HELP US HELP YOU!
Please consider making a Donation or becoming a Subscriber.
Every little bit helps. Thank you!

Pema

I'm sorry, Charlotte. I hope your doctor can persuade them.

14-hour work days are never good, so please do whatever you can to get those reduced. I can't imagine it's worth hurting yourself.

Hang in there. I'm sending good thoughts your way.
"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Lori Dee

Charlotte,

When you get to feeling down like this, please reach out to Samaritans.org. They are available 24/7 and can help you through this.

You can find all of their contact information in the UK at:
https://befrienders.org/find-support-now/samaritans-uk/?country=gb 🔗

Stay safe. We need you around.
My Life is Based on a True Story <-- The Story of Lori
The Story of Lori, Chapter 2
Veteran U.S. Army - SSG (Staff Sergeant) - M60A3 Tank Master Gunner
2017 - GD Diagnosis / 2019- 2nd Diagnosis / 2020 - HRT / 2022 - FFS & Legal Name Change
/ 2024 - Voice Training / 2025 - Passport & IDs complete - Started Electrolysis!

HELP US HELP YOU!
Please consider making a Donation or becoming a Subscriber.
Every little bit helps. Thank you!
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