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Have you been excluded or unwanted in some way because you are transgender?

Started by ChrissyRyan, Today at 01:51:53 PM

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ChrissyRyan

Today at 01:51:53 PM
Have you been excluded or unwanted in some way because you are transgender?

For an example, have you been asked to not show up presented in your transitioned to gender because there will be some people attending that would be upset to see a transgender person there?

What did you do?  Go in androgynous clothing?  Not go?  Go as yourself?


Chrissy
Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.  Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity.  Help connect a person to someone that may be able to help that person.  Be brave, be strong.  A TRUE friend is a treasure.  Relationships are very important, people are important, and the sooner we all realize that the better off the world will be.  Try a little kindness.  Be generous with your time, energy, wisdom, and resources.   Inconvenience yourself to help someone.   I am a brown eyed, brown haired woman. 
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    The following users thanked this post: Lori Dee

Charlotte_Ringwood

#1
Today at 02:25:26 PM
When I first started to transition my Mum and partner asked that I didn't dress female when there because of the neighbors! Since furthering my transition and my mum coming more to terms with the seriousness of it, she has apologized for how this must have made me feel.

I was moderately stressed at the time but managed as I was early transition. Just felt my wings clipped

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Lori Dee ✅

#2
Today at 02:27:54 PM
I have been excluded from family gatherings for years now. It is not exclusively because I am transgender, though. My brother and I had a falling out decades ago, pre-transition, and we have not spoken since. I was told that I was not invited to family reunions to prevent any confrontations between my brother and me.

Since coming out as transgender, other family members (strong MAGA cultists) have distanced themselves from me. My presence makes them uncomfortable.

What did I do?

I explained that the purpose of the family gatherings was not about me, and I preferred not be a spectacle. Instead of everyone just visiting and enjoying each other's company, the gathering would be much different. So, to spare them and me a load of discomfort, I refuse to attend.

I have waited for any of them to come forward and make some tiny effort to reconnect, make amends, apologize, or give some sign that they want me to be included. That has not happened in over ten years.

The truth is that I do not miss them.

One of my favorite quotes:

"If my absence doesn't matter, then my presence didn't matter."
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ChrissyRyan

#3
Today at 03:47:42 PM
Quote from: Lori Dee on Today at 02:27:54 PMI have been excluded from family gatherings for years now. It is not exclusively because I am transgender, though. My brother and I had a falling out decades ago, pre-transition, and we have not spoken since. I was told that I was not invited to family reunions to prevent any confrontations between my brother and me.

Since coming out as transgender, other family members (strong MAGA cultists) have distanced themselves from me. My presence makes them uncomfortable.

What did I do?

I explained that the purpose of the family gatherings was not about me, and I preferred not be a spectacle. Instead of everyone just visiting and enjoying each other's company, the gathering would be much different. So, to spare them and me a load of discomfort, I refuse to attend.

I have waited for any of them to come forward and make some tiny effort to reconnect, make amends, apologize, or give some sign that they want me to be included. That has not happened in over ten years.

The truth is that I do not miss them.

One of my favorite quotes:

"If my absence doesn't matter, then my presence didn't matter."



It is sad that they do not want to associate with such a nice person as you Dee.


Chrissy


Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.  Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity.  Help connect a person to someone that may be able to help that person.  Be brave, be strong.  A TRUE friend is a treasure.  Relationships are very important, people are important, and the sooner we all realize that the better off the world will be.  Try a little kindness.  Be generous with your time, energy, wisdom, and resources.   Inconvenience yourself to help someone.   I am a brown eyed, brown haired woman. 
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ChrissyRyan

#4
Today at 03:48:18 PM
Quote from: Charlotte_Ringwood on Today at 02:25:26 PMWhen I first started to transition my Mum and partner asked that I didn't dress female when there because of the neighbors! Since furthering my transition and my mum coming more to terms with the seriousness of it, she has apologized for how this must have made me feel.

I was moderately stressed at the time but managed as I was early transition. Just felt my wings clipped

Charlotte 😻


I guess they both came around, or at least your mom did!

Chrissy
Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.  Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity.  Help connect a person to someone that may be able to help that person.  Be brave, be strong.  A TRUE friend is a treasure.  Relationships are very important, people are important, and the sooner we all realize that the better off the world will be.  Try a little kindness.  Be generous with your time, energy, wisdom, and resources.   Inconvenience yourself to help someone.   I am a brown eyed, brown haired woman. 
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NancyDrew1930

#5
Today at 03:51:57 PM
I'm going to be facing a similar situation later this week but with Skype.  My sister and husband (they are 3/4 of the way across the continent) haven't told my niece and nephews yet and they don't want to expose their kids to someone who is transgender.  Apparently my brother-in-law is supposed to be letting me know what is appropriate to wear over Skype, but he hasn't said anything yet.  If he doesn't tell me anything, I'll just wear a normal top, and sit where the camera cuts off my skirt.  Although, it's going to be difficult hiding my breasts, since even through a top, they are noticeable.
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ChrissyRyan

#6
Today at 03:57:38 PM
I think it stinks to be unwelcome.  So many people have so many unfair ideas towards some specific type of people, and some of these characteristics these people have NO control over.

So you are too short or too tall?

What can you do about that?

You can extend the discussion beyond height.


Chrissy

Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.  Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity.  Help connect a person to someone that may be able to help that person.  Be brave, be strong.  A TRUE friend is a treasure.  Relationships are very important, people are important, and the sooner we all realize that the better off the world will be.  Try a little kindness.  Be generous with your time, energy, wisdom, and resources.   Inconvenience yourself to help someone.   I am a brown eyed, brown haired woman. 
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ChrissyRyan

#7
Today at 03:58:32 PM
Quote from: NancyDrew1930 on Today at 03:51:57 PMI'm going to be facing a similar situation later this week but with Skype.  My sister and husband (they are 3/4 of the way across the continent) haven't told my niece and nephews yet and they don't want to expose their kids to someone who is transgender.  Apparently my brother-in-law is supposed to be letting me know what is appropriate to wear over Skype, but he hasn't said anything yet.  If he doesn't tell me anything, I'll just wear a normal top, and sit where the camera cuts off my skirt.  Although, it's going to be difficult hiding my breasts, since even through a top, they are noticeable.

I thought that Skype went away and was replaced with Microsoft Teams or something else.
Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.  Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity.  Help connect a person to someone that may be able to help that person.  Be brave, be strong.  A TRUE friend is a treasure.  Relationships are very important, people are important, and the sooner we all realize that the better off the world will be.  Try a little kindness.  Be generous with your time, energy, wisdom, and resources.   Inconvenience yourself to help someone.   I am a brown eyed, brown haired woman. 
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ChrissyRyan

#8
Today at 03:59:38 PM
Quote from: NancyDrew1930 on Today at 03:51:57 PMI'm going to be facing a similar situation later this week but with Skype.  My sister and husband (they are 3/4 of the way across the continent) haven't told my niece and nephews yet and they don't want to expose their kids to someone who is transgender.  Apparently my brother-in-law is supposed to be letting me know what is appropriate to wear over Skype, but he hasn't said anything yet.  If he doesn't tell me anything, I'll just wear a normal top, and sit where the camera cuts off my skirt.  Although, it's going to be difficult hiding my breasts, since even through a top, they are noticeable.


That is unfortunate.  That stinks.  I am sorry you are this situation.

Chrissy
Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.  Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity.  Help connect a person to someone that may be able to help that person.  Be brave, be strong.  A TRUE friend is a treasure.  Relationships are very important, people are important, and the sooner we all realize that the better off the world will be.  Try a little kindness.  Be generous with your time, energy, wisdom, and resources.   Inconvenience yourself to help someone.   I am a brown eyed, brown haired woman. 
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NancyDrew1930

#9
Today at 04:15:58 PM
Quote from: ChrissyRyan on Today at 03:59:38 PMThat is unfortunate.  That stinks.  I am sorry you are this situation.

Chrissy

The only reason my brother-in-law is doing this is because my mom will be on with me and she doesn't use a computer, so I'm the one that has the technology and knows how to use it.

As for Skype...like Kleenex.
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